We face it, people gossip and we enjoy rumors that we are hearing especially when we are bored. Rumor and gossip are slightly different. A “rumor” is unclear information that we heard from unknown source but we have no proof whether that piece of story is true or false. A “gossip” is an idle talk, usually a “private and delicate thing” that people don’t talk openly about but revealed by someone and spread it out from one person to another behind the person’s back. That is gossip. Rumor on the other side is just an occasional story which might be true, partially true –- partially made up, or maybe totally made up but also passed on from one person to another. The receiver usually don’t care if the story is true or not and how it is delivered to another person.
Here, is one example of how rumor changes:
1) Maria: “Hoy Kulasa iyong manok namin nangitlog ng labindalawa, pero nakakapagtaka, kasi iyong anim na itlog parang itlog ng itik. Iniisip ko, baka napagawi ang isa sa alagang itik nang kapitbahay namin na nagkataong doon nangitlog mismo sa “nest” nong manok ko? Di kaya?
2) Kulasa: Hoy Petra alam mo ba yung manok ni Maria nangitlog ng itik, may duda daw siya sa itik nong kapitbayhay niya … sus, pwede palang mangyari yon?
3) Petra: Hoy, Pedro nabalitaan mo ba na iyong manok ni Maria at itik nong kapitbahay nila ay may relasyon pala? Ayun… nangitlog tuloy ng itik iyong manok ni Maria at nangitlog naman ng manok yung itik ng kapitbahay niya!
This may be an exaggerated example, but one piece of story can really change seriously if the listener heard it incorrectly and inadvertently delivered the story with slight changes. Even if these slight changes were made unintentionally, a new version of the story is born and the story becomes more exaggerated as people passed it on. Sometimes, the result….” the new version” maybe hurting to both you (as the victim), and the people close to you. When rumors already spread like virus, it becomes difficult to defend yourself. Some keep quiet, sat on it until rumor dies. For some, they reacted but as they do it, the more they got trapped. It’s like a nail that you hammered deeply into a wood, even if you pull it out again, the hole remains. So whatever you do, once you are the victim, you lose. It’s nice if you have friends around consoling you, but if nobody… just try to console yourself, ha ha ha. What else can you do? Ang mahalaga, you do not harm anybody and you have tried to be friendly with others. Pero sabi nga, you can’t please everybody. Hindi pwede talaga lahat ay matuwa sa iyo! Basta isipin mo na lang, for friends who really loves you, they don’t care about the rumor they heard. Rumour is another thing and the truth on your friendships is a separate matter. How to protect your friendship against rumor? SIMPLE – Be deft against rumor. Whether a rumor is true, false, partially true, decorated, or made up…. ignore it. Measure your closeness with your friends and think of the good old days. All people make mistakes but rumors worsen it. If your friend become a victim of this, ask yourself, do I care for my friend or I care for the carrier of this rumor? If you allow yourself to be influenced by this, you are extending a big favor to the rumor-maker. In short, protect your friend first by not making the “rumor-maker” happy!
Author: Rose Cruto Ho, TF Newsmag
*Published in True Friends Newsmag (October 2008 issue)
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