wordsmiths' nook

Call It Greed

2010-04-09T05:00:00.000-07:00

One afternoon while I prepare the pages of our February issue, I paused for a break to rest my aching back and headed for Worldwide House. My intention? To cut the monotony of the endless workload that surrounds me everyday which makes my mind lose its creativity. A brief call to "Goodfella" Rolly Cruz of PNB did bear some fruits – he is available for a 20-minute chat before his regular “Top Brass” meetings (must be, for he was immaculately dressed)!

Over a cup of coffee, we started with the usual pleasantries while the remaining 18 minutes or so were mutually shared with our respective opinions. I like this type of exchanges for it brings out the best (or the worst) in me. And true – my thoughts came flowing like juices in my mind. That is why I like Rolly – he is a mild talker and a good listener.

Assured of a friendly audience in him, I lamented my most recent encounter with an airport official in the new Airport Terminal 3 in the Philippines on my way back to Hong Kong. I took the Cebu Pacific flight and so I had the chance to experience the newly opened Terminal. I admire its spaciousness and cleanliness compared to the other 2 airport terminals but what disappointed me in my otherwise good day is the brazen & shameless attitude displayed by one official (Gosh! This guy looks so decent) who keeps on asking me for a “lai si” repeatedly showing me a red pocket as he knows I am Hong Kong bound. To me, this is plain and simple act of extortion. Extortion is synonymous to "kikil" - gamit pangtanggal ng kalawang – or to be more specific, it falls into the now infamous 'Corruptionary' lingo.

His persistence and sarcastic laughs when I dismissed his overtures prompted me to explain while containing my temper that the giving of lai si is a very meaningful Chinese tradition. In a tempered but confident voice, I told him that first, the giving of lai si is practiced by a married man towards a single man which obviously did not qualify him. Second, it is given by the Boss to the employee and again I said he is not my employee. And third, I told him that I am not Chinese so I don’t practice it. And so I was left in peace.

This is just a tiny incident that may not be worthy of publicity but these little things, like when drivers wantonly ignore bus stops & traffic signs; or when people unashamedly urinate in city walls & corners in broad daylight and in public view; or when the simple observance of orderly queue seems alien among our people; these somehow “irrelevant events” are to me a prognosis of a very sick society.

But what do we expect from a country whose leadership grabs the most attention in terms of millions or billions worth of anomalies in a consistent fashion? I may sound boringly repetitive with my regular whining but not to Mr. Cruz who has all ears to what I’m saying. And so as a human being, I tried to find reason why the current leaders of this administration would want to amass so much wealth that they may not even spend in their lifetime? Why? Well, I think the answer is simple!

When they step down (Oh yes, they know their time will come.), they must have enough wealth and money to remain in “power” and protect themselves from every attempt of retribution. The Marcoses were able to get away with it having remained popular and influential and unaccountable to the many excesses and abuses of their time. On the other hand, I have strong reason to believe that the former President Ramos is untouchable only because of his extensive military influence while ex-president Estrada was not too fast to secure his own “loot”, hence, resulted in his incarceration.

Meanwhile, Cory Aquino is not haunted by allegations of corruption until today because there were probably none, however, her inexperience and lack of political will was her failings. Cory missed to capitalize from that popular uprising that brought her to power, the chance to repudiate our country’s external debt – bowing instead to the powers of the WB & IMF and other International Finance Institutions for debts that never benefited the common Filipino people. Because of this, it is safe to say in retrospect that the purpose of her leadership in that critical time of our history was already doomed to fail from the start.

All told in a little over 18 minutes without sipping my coffee, Mr. Rolly asked me what I think is the solution? And who do I think would best lead our country? “Good question”, I replied; “I need another cup of coffee to be able to think of an answer”. And since he no longer have the “time”, I just excused myself for the day.

Author: Tony Bartolome

*Published in TF Newsmag February 2009 Issue

Cutting Edge

2009-11-21T07:28:00.000-08:00

It happened in a split second. Before I knew it, my dog and I were inches away from a Toyota Previa which madly veered towards our direction in the event of avoiding a fatal mishap with a truck. Then, like a scene from an action packed flick, it screeched to a halt. Casting a deep sigh, I walked away with legs akin to rubber for escaping death unscathed. There I was, with my adrenaline surged, rushed a mental note, the top three of a want-to-do list after a near death experience, which I posed to ten people I know . Surprisingly, answers were poured down to 2 categories: focused towards self and towards loved ones. One Brit, Cheddar Caveman, wrote to propose a smile to all the people he meets (imagine my sardonic grin. No but yeah, he’s kinda cute) . Hindsight, this is the social equivalent of being simply nice (er, then my hard work of sneering will go down to nothing!).

Then one wicked idea toyed in my complex whiny nutshell . It’s about asking the exact same question to politicians who are desperate for votes . As a moot question, I am pretty certain, most Filipinos will agree to the matter . This will be the political equivalent of analyzing what goes in their heads (at least), where their priorities lie ( if it's people oriented or to a rather largely selfish goals) and what economic strategies they come up with if they will eventually win a seat in the government. As incurable optimists Filipinos as can be, it is just right that voters heed their possible answers. Due to learned brainlessness on the part of the electorate, many keep on believing the pathetic lies exemplified by politicians, thus many stay, winning the same seat in a tight grip.

Of course, these buggers may have probably experienced a near kiss of death, perhaps at a rather frightening course. “Had these steely politicians ever purported a change in their governance style after being dealt with a near peep at pearly gates, something which could bring the Philippines to a cutting edge whereby people see change ?” one thinks. Astoundingly, the kinds of political figures we have today are just too happy to impetrate for help from rich countries rather than creating an atmosphere to raise the standard of living of the mundane and to equally share the growth expected . This should largely create a roadblock to extremism and to slow down the mad flow of brain drain, thus hauling the country from the brink. The Rwandan President significantly took the courage to build such change despite him taken to center stage as ruthless, authoritarian and undemocratic. So why can’t we?

Am I too dreamy? The sense of defeatism may prove pervasive but definitely it is not terminal. We need people to govern but let them be the ones who look after the interest of the poor to a larger degree because the poor make up the bigger constituent, the bigger number of the society, whether we like it or not.

As for the haughty question popped up to my mind, Keith asked the same to me. My answer will send the female Filipino population cringing. I’d get a bf with a sexy man rug and shag twice a day . He chuckled relentlessly before agreeing. And yes, I got invites. Bettina Arndt will be too happy to include me as her diarist. Of course I will never make any list. Spontaneity is still genuine and fun. Take life as it comes and make a difference. Viva Cheddar Caveman!!!

Author: Marife Tandoc

Pasaway Na Puso

2009-11-19T07:32:00.000-08:00

Puso -- katagang makapangyarihan, nakakakilig, makulay, minsan naman madugo at madalas pasaway. Kapag puso ang pinag-usapan marami ang natutuwa. Marami rin naman ang nalulungkot. At karamihan ay umiiwas sa usapang ito. Iba't iba man ang kuwento at dahilan ng bawat nilalang kung saan sangkot ang puso, it's still a part of our everyday scenario. Boring ang buhay kung wala kang matatawag na love life or sex life na karaniwang pasaway na puso ang siyang nagpapairal.

Hanga na sana ako sa kaibigan kong si Mabeth nang makita ko siyang all-out smile sa bagong pakilala sa aming foreigner guy friend. "Ang cute niya girl, 'di ba't kamukha niya si Ian Veneracion?", 'di niya mapigilang sabi. Sa sobrang tuwa ko, ginagap ko ang kanyang palad and gave her a handshake. "Wow, congrats 'tol! You did have an eye for a perfect creature." "Ano ba, kainis ka!", nakanguso niyang protesta. Natatawa na lang ako na pagmasdan ang reaction niya. Yeah, the guy was one hell of a hunk. Malaki nga lang ang brain damage ng kaibigan ko. Maya-maya pa'y narinig ko siyang tumitili. Hila ang laylayan ng aking damit, sinundan ko ang tingin ng kanyang mata. Sa 'di kalayuan mula sa pwesto ng aming mesa sa pub na aming pinasukan, isang naka-mint green sweater, nakabonnet at mala-anghel na mukha ang kampanteng nakikisabay sa indak ng tugtog. Cool ang porma, cool ang galaw, sobrang cool ang total package.

Mabeth rolled her eyes. "Ang cute niya. Kinikiliiiigggg ako..." Oh no! Kung naging dragon lang ako ako na bumubuga ng apoy, tustado na ang friend ko. "Hoy, 'yang nasa harapan mo ang ulamin mo. Dukutin ko kaya 'yang mata mo." Tumawa lang siya ng nakakaloka. "Basta, 'di tayo aalis dito hangga't hindi mo nakukuha ang number niya." Aba! demanding ang lola. Bakit ba kasi may mga nilalang na gaya niya? Siguro ako na lang ang natitirang abnormal sa mundo. Everything around the place makes me wanna kill myself.

Saan mang sulok dumako ang paningin ko, kakulay nila ang friend ko. Disaster talaga! Ganun pa man, mahal ko ang kaibigan ko kaya 'san man o anuman ang nakapagpapasaya sa kanya, s’yempre doon na rin ako. Pagbigyan ang kabaliwan, inalam ko ang pangalan ni cutie pie. Nice name. "Ice". Bongga! to the coolest level talaga. Bumalik ako sa aming mesa. Hindi pa rin mapakali sa kilig itong kaibigan ko. At nang tanungin niya ako kung nakuha ko ang number, "Your job," ang tanging sinagot ko sa kanya. Diskumpiyado pa rin ang hitsura nito. Kinuha nito ang bote ng beer at inisang lagok. Gawin bang tubig? Pinukol niya ako ng isang pilyang tingin saka nagmartsa palabas. Nahuhulaan ko na ang diskarte niya makuha lang ang numero ng kinakikiligan. Breaking the record. Salamat kay San Mig Lights!

Hindi ko alam kung nasa ayos pa siya ng mga sandaling 'yon. Napapailing na lamang akong sinundan siya. "Hi! 'Pwede ba makuha ang number mo?", walang pasakalyeng sabi nito paglabas ni Ice sa banyo. “Bakit ko naman ibibigay 'sayo, eh 'di ko nga binigay 'dun sa babaeng nangungulit sa akin kanina?”, tinutukoy nito ang medyo may edad ng katabi lamang nila kanina sa mesang inookupa nila. "Eh, kasi nga sa 'kin mo ibibigay," puno ng kumpiyansang tugon ni Mabeth. Tumawa lang ang huli. Naaaliw na lamang akong pagmasdan sila. Ayyy... puso nga naman. Mga Pasaway!

Sa pag-aakala ni Mabeth na 'di ko siya sinundan, agad siyang nagkuwento kung pa'no niya napasakamay ang numero ni Ice ng balikan niya ako. "So you really like that Ice, huh!", panunukso ko sa kanya. "So much!," abot tenga ang ngiti nito. The intense desire in their eyes couldn't be denied. They wanted each other. And in 2 days time simula ng magkakakilala sila, wala ng pakiputan. They were already an item. May magagawa ba ako? Puso nila 'yon. Well, who the hell cares?

Eh, ano ngayon if Ice is a les, as in "lesbian"? Kung kaguwapuhan lang din naman ang pag-uusapan, mas marami nga siyang mailalampaso na mga barako. Besides, it's the character that matters. Mali man sa tingin ng iba, eh ano ngayon? Mamatay na lang kayo sa inggit!

Author: Amy Gunnacao

Year Of The Ox

2009-11-14T01:43:00.000-08:00

I call them Tony’s Angels – Tony Bartolome’s bevy of Filipina beauties who provide much of the literary input for True Friends Magazine.

It was my third trip to Hong Kong in almost as many months – I first came out to the region in October after a gap of thirty years and was wonderfully looked after then by Miam (The Boss) Medrano. A little over a month later the Hong Kong Tourist Board brought me over on an all expenses paid trip (along with five other Middle Eastern journalists) as I had been asked to write a number of articles for a travel magazine. Flown over on Cathay First Class, pampered in both the Shangri La hotels, taken to a string of good restaurants and shown some more of the city’s sites (including, I’m sorry to say, the truly awful Disneyland, which was the only down side of the entire trip… but hey, don’t get me started!). I’m sure I could get used to such a luxurious lifestyle!

And being smitten by the city and its people, it didn’t take a lot to tempt me to come on over again for Chinese New Year. Once again M(TB)M pulled out all the stops for me, sharing me around all the other Angels – such an ego boost for a hot blooded male who was made to feel so very welcome by one and all.

Who could forget Amy’s smile which seemed to linger in the air as the rest of her disappeared round a corner, much like the Cheshire Cat in Alice in Wonderland? Or Annabelle’s business savvy as she rushed around collecting sugar packets from the likes of Mc Donalds for sale on eBay? How about Marie who complained that I was too tall and proceeded to call me daddy as she skipped along the street holding on tightly and trying to flutter her eye lashes at me. “Daddy buy me some ice cream,” she wailed. “Only if you are a good girl,” she was told. (She never got her ice cream!) How about Daisy and Ines and Zyrel and Edenell and Marife and all the other Angels, too numerous to mention here?

I was taken to see the Temple of 10,000 Buddhas which for some inexplicable reason is totally missing from the HKTB’s Visitor’s Kit. This has to be one of the best must-visit places in the whole of HK. We started out by breaking into a picnic lunch by the IFC’s Caribou (much better to carry it around inside us, rather than lug heavy boxes around). The security guards tried to move us on. Not because we were making a nuisance of ourselves, but because they thought there were too many open boxes of food. What might the other visitors to the Caribou think? But Daisy placated them and they left us in peace to munch through the mountains of food.

And then it was off to Sha Tin where we met up with Amy’s friend Mercy who led us to the golden Buddhas… eventually. First we took a wrong turn and found ourselves in a kind of cemetery which was actually next door to the temple, but interesting and noteworthy all the same. And then M(TB)M spotted a path winding up the hillside which indeed proved to be the way to the temple.

I found on a website that there are actually 12,600 Buddha statues, rather than the 10,000 implied by the name. (But then, who can say? Amy lost count after the first two or three hundred anyway, as she mistakenly believed that others in the party would count the ones she had missed.)

We all posed beside our preferred statues – one that I leant against was not anchored down and toppled somewhat precariously until I managed to retrieve it and stop it rolling down the hillside. (Not sure Temple of 9,999 Buddhas would have had quite the same cachet as the original name.) We all posed with our respective zodiac animals. Me beside a tiger; Daisy in front of a dragon; M(TB)M with a rat; Amy with a cockerel; Annabelle with a dog; Mercy with an ox and Marie with her ear pressed perilously close to the backside of a ram.

Other highlights of my trip (not to mention the pizza parties in Tony’s office) included the New Year’s procession (tip for next time – stay in and watch it on TV); and the fireworks display which we watched from the IFC Mall, thereby missing the drama of one of the barges catching alight and wondering why there was so much black smoke that at times one was hard pressed to see the fireworks at all. It will all end with the Chinese character for an Ox, M(TB)M predicted. But from where we were, it was all just obliterated by the smoke. Her prediction was acknowledged by a report in the South China Morning Post, however, which prompted an apology from yours truly who was ashamed that he had had so little faith in her tourist guide capabilities.

We visited some of HK’s beautiful parks – Victoria Park and Hong Kong Park and the Botanical Gardens – where there was so much to see and learn. How do you tell the difference between a turtle and a tortoise, for instance? Throw them both into a pond and see which one crawls out. Oh look, there’s a Burmese Python, said M(TB)M in the reptile house. How do you know it’s a Burmese Python, asked a member of the party, better to remain anonymous. I read the sign, she was told!

And talking of signs, HK is full of wonderful collector’s items. “For your own safety, please do not climb up … the staircases” advised one notice; whilst another by a fountain admonished “No climbing or padding”. “Closed” said another sign on a door which was blocked open and through which visitors walked. But my favourite sign was a massive billboard positioned very close to Tony’s office. “Single unattached billboard looking for love” read the main headline, with accompanying classified ads as diverse as “Have Viagra: Need woman – any woman between 18 and 60” and “For sale: Complete set of Encyclopaedia Britannica. 45 volumes. No longer needed. Got married last weekend. Wife knows everything.”

Aaaahhhh. Hong Kong . Don’t you just love it!

Author: Brian Salter

Kaylupit Mo Pag-ibig

2009-11-13T05:18:00.000-08:00

Masarap ang magmahal at mahalin. Ngunit paano kung ang minahal mo ay sasaktan at iiwan ka lang? Ano ang gagawin mo? Gaganti ka ba at gagayahin mo ang ginawa niya sa iyo? Manahimik at magsasawalang kibo? Tanggapin ang pangyayari at magmove-on sa buhay? Alamin po natin.

Pag-ibig! Iyan ang pangunahing suliranin ng mga OFW saang panig man ng mundo.Unahin na natin ang mga nasa Hong Kong. Napakarami sa atin na ganyan ang problema. Nang magpunta ka dito napakaganda ng inyong mga pangarap para sa inyong pamilya at mga
anak. Umalis ka sa atin dahil ninais mo na makaipon at mapag-aral ang mga anak. Ngunit bakit iba ang nangyari, nasira ang pagsasama nyo ng asawa mo. Ano ba ang nangyari? Parang may mali, di ba? Nabalitaan mo na lang na may ginagawang milagro ang asawa mo. Aray ko po! Ah, napakasakit at nakakalungkot.

Minsan ayaw man nating tanggapin na may mga pagkakataon na tayo rin ang may kasalanan. Sa katwiran natin na "okey lang na magluko ang asawa basta ba pagdating ako parin ang asawa nya". At okey lang basta huwag siyang mag-aanak sa iba. Iba ka sa lahat, iba ka kung magmahal! Okey lang sa iyo dahil katwiran mo pa nga na kailangan ng asawa mo ang pangangailangan niya bilang isang lalake at katwiran pa
ng ilang lalake naman walang mawawala sa kanya, bagkus nagpapatingkad pa sa kanyang pagkalalake. Aba, bongga! Eh ikaw ba, tayo, walang pangangailangan? May puso ka, katawan at pakiramdam, di ba? Kaya kung katwiran nyo eh kailangan nya dapat sabihin nyo din kailangan nyo rin pero nagtitiis kayo dahil mahal nyo siya at ayaw nyong masira ang pinagsamahan nyo. Dahil katwiran na okey lang, kinukunsinti mo lang ang pagluluko ng asawa mo. Tingnan mo ha, dahil sa katwiran mo na iyan, ang asawa mong mabait, aba, nawiwili siya kasi nga katwiran mo "okey lang". Paano iyan kung matutuhan na niyang mahalin ang kinalolokohan niya? Ano na ang mangyayari? Eto na, magsisimula na ang away at walang katapusang sumbatan. Kesyo ganyan, kesyo ganito! Kasi ikaw, kasi siya! Ah, buhay pag-ibig, nakakabaliw!

Kailangan kasi natin na palagiang may komunikasyon sa ating mga mahal ng maiwasan kahit papaano ang mga ganitong pangyayari. Kung ang atin pong mga asawa ay nagluko lang noong umalis kayo sa Pilipinas pag-usapan nyong dalawa kung ano ba talaga? Saan na ba papunta ng relasyon nyo? May aasahan ka pa ba? At dapat ka pa bang umasa? Kung sinabi niya na ikaw parin ang mahal nya, okey fine! Bigyan natin ng isa pang pagkakataon. Why not? Coconut? Chestnut di ba? Tanggapin mo, bakit hindi? Kailangan mo tanggapin na tao lang ang asawa mo at natutukso rin. Lalo na kung ang asawa mo ang nilalapitan. Kung may pag-asa pa ang pagsasama nyo gawin nyo ang magagawa para maayos pa ang ang pinag samahan nyo. Sayang naman kung mauuwi sa wala ang sinimulan nyo. Pakialam mo ba sa iniisip ng iba kung iyon naman ang paraan para maging masaya ka. Dapat naman talaga na kayo ang higit na nagkakaintindihan dahil relasyon nyo iyan hindi ninuman. Kung kinakilangan na masakripisyo ka maging maayos lang ang samahan, bakit hindi? Pero kung ginawa mo na lahat, as in nilunok mo ng lahat ng pride mo, wala parin halaga sa kanya at pagkalipas lang ng ilang araw ayan na naman.Aba ba ba! Mag-isip-isip ka na kung okey lang ba sa iyo at kung kakayanin mo na dalawa kayo sa kanya? Over na iyan ha! Kailangan na mamili siya kung sino ba talaga sa inyo ang mahal niya? Hindi puwede iyong katwiran na ikaw ang mahal niya pero may iba pang nakareserba na pag wala ka siya muna proxy ika nga. Dahil kung mahal ka niya, patunayan at panindigan niya.

Oo, mahirap ang malayo sa mahal mo ngunit dahil my pangarap ka kaya kailangan mo na magsakripisyo. Sino ba ang di nahihirapan pag malayo ka sa mga minamahal? Wala di ba? Mahirap iyong umasa ka sa wala at nagmumukha kang tanga! Kailangan din naman nating magtira ng pagmamahal para sa sarili natin. Kapag nagmahal tayo kailangan 50-50 lang. Hindi maaaring lahat lahat dahil pag nabigo tayo baka maloka ka. Eh ang pag-ibig pa naman pag pumasok sa puso, patay, bulag, pipi at bingi. In short, kakaloka!

Ngayon kung ang sagot sa iyo ay mas mahal na niya si SPO2 , ngak, patay! Kailangan mo ng mag-isip at magdesisyon kung ano ang mas makakabuti sa iyo -- ang maging martir ba habang buhay o ang palayain siya? Ah, napakasakit, kuya Eddie! Kaylupit mo pag-ibig! Sinasabi ng iba na bahala na siya sa buhay niya at hahanap na lang ng iba. Madaling sabihin, mahirap gawin lalo na kung itinakda mo na sa isip mo na siya ang asawa mo at magsasama kayo sa hirap at ginhawa. Paano pa nga kayo magsasama kung may mahal na siyang iba? At si SPO2 na ang gusto nyang makasama sa hirap at ginhawa kahit pa mali ang isipin ng iba. Kailangan ba na maghabol ka sa kanya habangbuhay dahil asawa mo siya? Oh come on! Move on. Ang buhay natin ay napakaiksi sasayangin mo pa ba ito sa isang kaluluwang ayaw na sa iyo? Sabi ko nga po kanina kung may pag-asa pa, bakit hindi? Pero kung wala na, hello?! Magising ka sa katotohanan at tanggapin ang kapalaran di ba? Kailangan natin ng lakasan ng loob at harapin ang bukas. Kung ang iisipin nyo lang siya at siya wala ng iba eh maawa naman kayo sa sarili nyo higit sa lahat sa mga anak na umaasa sa inyo. Ipakita nyo sa asawa nyo na kaya nyo na kahit mawala siya makakaya nyo. Sino ba sya para habul-habulin nyo? Lalo na kaya lang pala siya nakakuha ng SPO2 dahil sa padala nyo. Hah! Masaya ka! Kaarawan mo ba araw-araw? Akin naman ang bukas.

Sa mga anumang samahan dito sa Hong Kong pangkaraniwan na natin itong naririnig. Pero alam nyo ba na hindi ibig sabihin na kaya lang nagluko ang asawa nyo eh dahil andito kayo. Ang mga asawa kung nais talagang magluko kahit katabi nyo gabi-gabi sa higaan gagawa at gagawa ng paraan iyan upang magawa ang nais nya. Nagkataon lang na mas may dahilan sila dahil malayo ka sa kanya kaya iyon ang idinadahilan niya. Ika nga ng kasabihan "kung gusto may paraan, kung ayaw may dahilan." Tama naman, hindi ba?

Kaylupit mo pag-ibig to the point na nagmumukha ka nang tanga at sugar mommy. Iyong iba pa nga kay SPO2 nagpapadala ng pera at siya na ang bahalang magbudget para sa mga anak dahil hindi marunong sa pera si general. Sustentado, asensado, abusado ika mo! At pag wala kang maipadala aawayin ka at ibinebenta ang mga naipundar mong gamit. Wow! At kung wala ng gamit babalasin ang bahay dingding man o bubong ng bahay. Mga tinamaan ng magaling! Ikaw kasi eh masyadong mabait. Ang iba naman, sabi bibili daw ng bahay o lupa, pasamahin na natin bahay at lupa, kamukat-mukat wala pala, pinag-pasarap o pinantustos lang pala sa luho ni SPO2. Gusto ko na atang mag-amok, lalaban ka ba? Maraming kuwento, ibat-ibang mukha ng kalokohan. Hay, life!

Sa dami ng nangyari, nangyayari at mangyayari pang ganito sana magkapuwang parin ang pagpapatawad. Pagpapatawad bilang kaibigan man lang at katuwang kahit papaano para sa mga anak. Kung nangyari man ito sa atin sana wag nating ipagkait ang mga anak natin sa kanilang ama o ina man. Dahil pagbabaligtarin man natin ang mundo magulang parin sila ng mga anak mo. Hindi ko sinasabing magkabalikan pa kayo kung wala na iyong respeto at pagmamahal mo sa kanya. Ang ibig kong sabihin ay bilang kaibigan man lang para sa mga bata. Ngunit kung ang mga bata na ang ayaw eh mahirap iyon, ibig sabihin grabe ka, general. At sorry, di ba kailangan ligawan nya ang mga anak nya para mapaamo niya?

Masakit at mahirap man tanggapin ngunit may mga pangyayaring nais man nating iwasan pero iyon pa rin ang nangyayari. Parang aksidente, ingat na ingat ka na eh nababangga ka pa rin. Huwag po nating hayaan na palaging poot ang naiiwan sa ating puso at isipan. Imulat natin ang ating mundo sa panibagong yugto ng buhay. Dahil walang mangyayari sa atin kung palagi tayong nakalingon sa nakaraan, mababangga ka, ikaw rin. Harapin mo ang kasalukuyan at tanawin mo ang kinabukasan. Magsilbi kang sandigan ng iyong mga mahal na anak. Malay mo, may makikilala kang higit pa sa nang-iwan sa iyo at tanggapin ang nakaraan mo. Tuloy ang buhay kahit nag-iisa. Isipin mo na siya ang nawalan ng iwan ka niya at hindi siya kawalan sa buhay mo. Maraming nagmamahal sa iyo. Pangyaw, andito lang kami.

Author: Daisy Vanzuela

Published in True Friends Newsmag September 2009 Issue (vol. 6 no. 2)

The Beauty of New Zealand

2009-11-11T22:49:00.000-08:00

Wished nowhere but home. Do I need reasons? Work has to serve its purpose and so does time for every plan. I wasn't entirely excited when Boss asked me to spend a month with them back in their home country.

Twelve hours air travel, five times miles away from family, aches and longings but as I step out from the plane onto the tarmac I was treated to a visual feast so stunning that it took my breath (and pains) away. Scenic view of wide lush fields, feast-like coasts and cosmopolitan areas provide an amphitheater unfolding the unique beauty of New Zealand. First morning I woke up at 5. Well, actually the sun rose before 4. It shone brightly on the window blinds (sunsets at 9 pm). Glorious. I decided to walk around the neighborhood. Anti-clockwise seemed the right way to explore, I don’t know why, just a hunch. But the hunch proved right. My location: Waikanae. It is part of Kapiti Coast situated at the Northern Island.

Strolling is great that it became a ritual. The beach is just 5 minutes walk down from our residence. And I was amazed that no matter how many times I walked around the place, I always spot something new and I did enjoy munching wild berries picked along the roadside on my way.

I visited the world famous Nga Manu Reserve, it's a bird sanctuary protecting endangered animals and birds of rare kinds like the kiwi, it has a body smaller than a native chicken yet it can lay egg bigger than that of ostrich... really amazing. Also I watched a Jousting Show, the settings, music, costumes and games were so medieval. I felt I was classically transported back 200 hundred years ago.

For me, holidays are also about history. I can’t bear to be in a place without knowing how it came about or what makes it tick. So after attending Holy Mass, I spent most of my Sundays exploring museums, bookshelves, and interesting places. Nothing can compare to learning the history of people while you are there.

From Waikanae, Paraparaumu Station, it takes 45 minutes by train to reach NZ's capital city, Wellington. The city's historic Cable Car brought me up to Mt. Victoria summit, a 360-degree views over the top, so magnificent. Botanical garden, flower displays, walking trails are added treat to enjoy. I wandered along its heritage buildings and colonial charm. I stopped at the Wellington Cathedral, the National Library and the nation's political powerhouse-Parliament Building. I even sat at the exact chamber where PM John Key delivers law and order… sorry bawal and kamera. On the central waterfront, Te Papa (NZ's national museum), I had interactive and innovative experience. In Our Space, Earth Quake House, it simulates real shakes and aftershocks, likewise with other adrenalin-filled motion simulators. I came face to face with the infamous Colossal Squid: 4.2 m long, weighing 495 kgs… yap, almost half a ton, (at katumbas ng gulong ng malaking truck ang diameter ng katawan ang isang hiwa) preserved in 3D glass compartment. And oh, more than 300 impressive artworks-both historical and contemporary.

Along with the fascinating stories of this land and its people… bitin ang half day mo sa loob. I had unusual close encounter with the cheetahs, giraffes, and red pandas at the Wellington Zoo and was deeply enchanted at the film location of the Oscar-sweeping trilogy "Lord of the Rings". Along the outskirts of the Shire and the eerie darkness of Buckland Forest, I trailed along the same path where the Hobbits took the ferry, and the famous site "Get off the Road" scene.

Alone wandering? Nope, lots of locals are too eager to entertain and in each destination, fortunately, I was always with someone when it's time to eat, to get lost, to laugh, and to fill in photo memories. So that was 28 days of summer in NZ. Yes, it's one of the most memorable experience of my life. I love this place. Everything is accessible, including the past, and it’s free. Sights and sounds, fresh air, organic foods, 4.2 million friendly people, 17 million sheep, added new friends... I have to tear myself away.

As I climbed the steps of the plane, vowing to return, I have sweet plans in July when the cheese and wines are at their best and the Alps will be covered by snow.

Author: Annabelle Libao

Worthwhile Pursuits

2009-11-10T15:22:00.000-08:00

As my BA flight taxied through the tarmac, I made quick recount of the year that was. My clamor for change towards my current disposition about life ceaselessly pounded me all throughout the past year. With a massive amount of courage, I willed to seize every chance there is to initiate that change. Remembering that New Year's eve, I left the year bearing a positive note.

Before I could get up, from my aisle seat (my choice of seating arrangement for long haul flights) to gather my stuff, I rummaged through my neurons of what capacity I have to fulfill this year's aspirations. My limitations will bound to grip me helpless, I'm sure, but to dream, plan and find ways to make these happen will worth any wait. Same ways in the past, when my thirst for something more to fulfill my aspirations was insatiable. The faith that somehow, sometime, these pursuits will bound to happen lingered on.

There was a time when I was searching for a school which offers courses for professional advancement, I sighed in exasperation upon learning that I needed to submit a good number of contact hours of continuing education as an additional requirement for admission. It started there. Someone did actually called me a psycho for endlessly searching and hauling all capabilities to learn and test and garner certificates on accredited sites. Completion is still halfway through but smile is slowly replacing my long time burrowed forehead (of which is good because I'm too young to be a candidate for botox. Ha ha.).

One could blatantly surmise that to pursue educational pursuits is somewhat out of reach given the current situation. Pretty true. Everyone is harping how bleak the economic atmosphere is. It's doom and gloom for most families back home and we, the providers are directly affected. Selflessness resurfaces as a result in order to meet the growing demands of living. Prices soar to an inconceivable heights, sadly speaking. Yet again, to dream of something more on the educational front and hold on to it is perhaps worth doing. Instill a faith of what one can do, unshakable even when then eyes are blinded by tears of frustration. Never settle for less such as ending up undergoing surgical procedures to sell body parts, a misguided concept. (Some people actually resort to such measures as in nephrectomy to sell one of their functioning kidneys for a huge amount. Out of desperation, I believe). The madness of being less empowered is sometimes undaunting, true. But to keep believing and taking charge could keep one on track. After all, the promise of economic revival is always there.

To emulate those who invested on knowledge could have a long term effect. After all, knowledge is unsurprisingly ubiquitous. I suppose, it is worth not letting it sit idly within one's reach and like a macrophage engulfing an invading microorganism, be ready to conquer.

As I got up from my seat, ready to breathe Hong Kong life once again, my smile never left. I clutched my rucksack and strode my way out the plane ready to face the battle of daily life. With me is the promise of achieving my plans.

Author: Marife Tandoc

Winner: Bagong Tuklas na Manunulat of the Month. Published in True Friends Newsmag February 2009 Issue (Vol. 5 no.7)

Too Much Power Corrupts

2009-07-21T07:38:00.000-07:00

Once, my friend jokingly said that for the Philippines to really rise up from the ashes it has to burn down first. Then he continued by insisting that for a fresh start, all existing politicians should be wiped out from every nook and corner of the Philippine island and those who will declare in public that they are aspiring to be mayors, congressmen, senators, etc., should immediately be exterminated. Thus, he argued, when we reach a state wherein we force our friends to run for public office, or say, beg those we admire and respect the most to run for president but still they refuse to accept either for fear of their lives or scared of the sacrifices that is required of a public servant, only then he said, can we safely say that our country is indeed on the road to recovery.

Of course, these are just wishful thinking because we know for a fact that our country is abundant of power-hungry leaders who would do everything in their means to remain in power. These are people who believe that to remain “there” is not everything – it is the only thing. I have consistently spoken in the past that the most effective reformers and ideal voice of change our country badly needs will not come from the breed of politicians or military personnel or even celebrities we have today, but rather, it will come from the ranks of the OFWs because of the unique traits we have acquired through all the years we spent overseas. Below are just some of the qualities I am referring to and the reasons why:

1. Good Governance -- Our temporary stay on the host country where we work, give us the opportunity to witness that good governance leads to efficient public utility services such as water & electric supplies, affordable but dependable transport system, transparent government bureaucracy, etc. These amenities eventually results to a stable, orderly and progressive society. Majority of our people back home are unaware that these “luxuries” -- as migrants like us call it – are not impossible to achieve because these are products of a government run by ordinary folks like us.

2. Self-sufficient -- Our society should be appreciating real heroes (the OFWs) - people who sacrifice their own interests for the good of others - and not self-centered, grandstanding politicians. As workers, we have learned to look after the welfare of our own family and have lived with the fact that our government cannot be depended upon in times of need.

3. Honest Labor -– We know the value of every dollar that we earn. We pride ourselves with the thought that what we feed our family comes from honest work - galing sa pawis at luha nating mga manggagawa. If only our leaders will have the same principle in their conduct of running the affairs of our government… but again, that is also wishful thinking.

4. Visionaries -– Against daunting odds, we were able to provide food, clothing, shelter and education to our loved ones. On top of that, to combat homesickness, boredom and other negative vibes that is commonly associated with being an OFW, we learned to manage our limited free time positively. Many among us have developed skills in organizing events, honed our entrepreneurship skills and appreciate charity work.

The qualities that I mentioned above are just but a few of what we have become. I just hope that we can finally unite into one strong body in order for us to fight the ills of our society. Few weeks ago, I was invited to attend in what is now known as a very private and selective gathering with President GMA and FG Mike Arroyo in a restaurant in Central. I was ushered on a table few feet away from where the President, the First Gentleman and their entourage where sitting and I couldn’t help but wonder how these two seemingly harmless individuals inflicted so much harm to our country. Instantly, the scandals wherein they have strongly been linked came flashing in my mind – the Garci tapes, NBN-ZTE scandal, Joc-Joc Bolante Fertilizer scam and the most recent issue regarding Charter Change. Although there are numerous anomalies and countless questionable transactions our current administration is accused of, these 4 incidents are perhaps the most unrivaled in terms of ruthlessness, figuratively speaking. Garci tapes scandal points to the tampering of the results of the 2004 election –- an indication that there were concerted efforts to undermine the will of the people. The NBN-ZTE deal shocked the people by the sheer amount of the bribe –- alleged to be somewhere around 130 million US dollars. Whew! The Fertilizer scam, although smaller in amount compared to the NBN-ZTE scam, was supposedly intended for the farmers – meaning, it was meant for the very disadvantaged sector of our society, ninakaw pa nila (ang lupit talaga!). And now most recently are the efforts, obviously, by this administration to modify our Constitution to suit their insatiable thirst for more and endless power.

As an editor and a concerned citizen, I normally get excited in the presence of VIPs especially when the VIPs I am referring to are no less than the most powerful and influential figures in our country. No disrespect to those who invited me, but the truth is I felt no trace of admiration to the President and her husband especially when she triumphantly proclaimed that she was able to secure numerous job-placements from various countries in the middle east and Japan. While she received a vibrant applause from the selected guests over her announcement, I cannot help but be dismayed to hear from our President, who boasted herself as an economist, that she was able to secure more deployment for our people as contract workers overseas. How can a true leader rejoice by the thought of sending your people away? I have spent two thirds of my life as an overseas worker and I stand proud of what I have accomplished – no thanks to the government. I strongly believe that I share the same sentiments of most of the OFWs. We know that our government has consistently failed us. We feel it when we go home for our regular vacation, the hassles at the airport, the red tapes in every government offices we are required to visit, even all the people seem to be in an extortion mode when they find out who we are.

For now, while I longed for a leader who will stand before us and speak of decent jobs to be created in our own country, of realistic plans to lure honest businessmen to invest, to give us hope that corruption can finally be contained and peace and order can be restored in our land, I will remain vigilant and hopeful until that day will come!

Author: Tony Bartolome

Of Vision, Division And Prevention (Rising Above Negative Criticism)

2009-04-09T21:21:00.000-07:00

“Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon”, this award-winning movie title best describes the China that I saw when I visited the capital city, Beijing, two weeks ago. After a 3 ½ hour gentle Air China flight from Hong Kong, we landed in an airport 3 times bigger than Chek Lap Kwok Airport. If there is one obvious spectacle that a non-Beijinger would immediately notice upon arrival, it is its grandeur and sheer vastness. As part of a K-Touch group (Manufacturer and Distributor of K-Touch Mobile phones) on a 4-day business trip, we were welcomed by our local counterpart who immediately ushered us to the hotel. True to my first impression, the 30-minute ride through smooth traffic in a late afternoon on an almost empty freeway reinforced my thoughts -- that the airport, the freeways, the transport system and other structures that I saw, are obviously built to accommodate a business environment that is yet to come, say 5 or 10 years in the future. What strikes me with admiration though is the ability of its leader to prepare their country for these challenges ahead. That is what I call VISION!

Except for the slight distraction caused by this “Chip Tsao incident”, I have no doubt that the Filipino politicians and entrepreneurs have already noticed this transformation and consider China as a serious partner both economically and politically.

On a personal level, Chip Tsao’s article has not elicited my contempt simply because it’s not worth it. Instead, I pity this poor soul for “he know not what he is doing”. On his opening statement – "The Russians sank a Hong Kong freighter last month, killing the 7 Chinese seamen onboard. We can live with that-—Lenin and Stalin were once the ideological mentors of all Chinese people. The Japanese planted a flag on Diàoyú Island. That’s no big problem…”, Mr. Tsao is implying that he can take the bullying from “stronger” countries and at the same time rejoice in bullying the “weaker” ones. This kind of persona reminds me of infamous people such as Hitler, Mussolini, etc… characters who had provoked and incited people to harbor hatred against others through their misguided or misplaced concept of nationalism. And so it is no wonder why his article brought condemnation both from the Filipino community and Hong Kong people. In this age of the internet -- where the world becomes a small global village -- this kind of mentality, no matter how Mr. Tsao defends it, has no place in a just and decent society. He is a disgrace to the Chinese people in general. Instantly, my local Chinese friends called me to express their disgust as soon as they came across his article. Mr. Chip Tsao’s mentality towards people who are doing honest labor, no matter how menial, is what creates animosity in our society. That is what I call DIVISION!

On the other hand, as responsible members of our community, we should treat this incident as a wake-up call for us to discipline our own ranks and stay on guard at all times. Meaning, we have to be vigilant to the excesses that may arise in our conduct as “transients” in our adopted home. On this regard, I strongly urge our community leaders to take notice of how our people behave in public places, especially during holidays, such as gambling in public view (i.e., tong-its, pusoy…), barricading highly visible walkways with thick cardboards (karton) which is obviously an eyesore, leaving behind piles of trash in places of convergence, or any acts for that matter that may offend the sensitivities of others. Kailangan pa bang antayin natin ang Hong Kong government pa ang magbawal sa atin? Officers of the Philippine Consulate must look into this matter and come out with appropriate recommendations. I understand the shortage of manpower from our consular office but there is urgency in this problem that I think they must seriously consider. In as much as I admire and commend our consular staff for gracing our community events with inspirational speeches, I urge them to do a brief detour to the places where our OFWs get together during holidays before proceeding to their appointments so that they themselves can witness what many already know – that during Sundays and holidays our kababayans have literally taken over the many paved walkways and corridors, especially areas around Central and Admiralty, making it appear like we are squatters. We should come up with answers as to why our workers choose these places for “rest & recreation” instead of the more appropriate areas such as public parks and other shelters. Is it lack of space? Is it because of its proximity to Worldwide House? O kaya likas lang talagang wala ng halaga sa loob natin ang maaaring ipuna o masagwang masabi ng ibang tao sa ating lahi? Whatever is the reason, believe me, we should get answers now or find ourselves being bombarded with complaints in the very near future. Have we ever forgotten the old saying: “An ounce of prevention, is worth a pound of cure”? Now, I challenge you to act on this “PREVENTION”.

As for us in True Friends Newsmag, we will continue to do our share of raising awareness to some of our negative traits so that we can rectify it before another persona of Tsao’s mentality take advantage of it and poke fun at us once again.

Author: Tony Bartolome

*Published in TF Newsmag (April 2009 Hong Kong issue)

Tsao Mentality Explored

2009-04-01T22:42:00.000-07:00

"As a nation of servants, you don't flex your muscles at your master, from whom you earn most of your bread and butter," wrote Chip Tsao on his HK Magazine article. The bigot columnist apparently has a heavy chip on his shoulders. Whatever grievances he has, he need not take it out on an entire nation nor a powerless group (the domestic helpers). Had Tsao been the egoistic master and I, his humble servant I'd tell the old fart to take my "bread and butter" and shove it up his ass. Oh man, I pity the poor soul working for him -- if he really has one. He probably couldn't afford to hire a local maid if his only bread-and-butter depends on his unprofessional writing. Even if he's filthy rich and offered me a job to clean up his daily filth for, say twice, the amount I'm earning now... I'd still tell him to shove the darn job up his butt. The Filipinos that Tsao speaks lowly of may not all be professionals but we do our job professionally that is why many (for your information, master fool Tsao!) nations seek our services. In case, Tsao misinterprets my piece, I'll make my message clear: There is nothing so sweet in this write up, peahead. Read ahead to enlighten your dark, ancient, narrow, narcissistic mind! I'm an amateur creative writer so pardon my colorful language, old hog.

"As a nation of servants, you don't flex your muscles at your master, from whom you earn most of your bread and butter"... the Tsao mentality. How else can we Filipinos, or even non-Filipinos, interpret such words other than a racist's remark. Tsao added more insult to injury by saying his words were misinterpreted...
"The article was never intended to be insulting to the Filipino domestic workers," he told Agence France-Presse (AFP). "English, being a global language, is open to different interpretations by those who come from various cultural backgrounds." Now what? You're suggesting we're morons? Get lost!

Tsao must get off the Spratly Islands issue since he's obviously not in a sane, diplomatic mind to write about such (if anything, he's simply creating a great divide) just as I won't talk about Spratly Islands which I know not much about but I'm here for my people, I speak as an 11-year Overseas Filipino Worker (OFW).

Sadly, the Tsao mentality (arrogance, superiority-complex, one-track mind, narrow vision, and snobbery) exists in any part of the world. When I worked for a manpower agency in Taichung City in 1999, one of the agents told me that Taiwanese employers no longer want to hire Filipino workers. When I asked why, a client/employer complained to my agent that "Filipinos are very smart. They know their rights and can sue you to court. Other nationalities won't complain as much, cost cheaper, and got the 'yes-ma'am' attitude." We both laugh at that. The months that followed after that little conversation had proven my agent wrong... The five employers I've been sent to by the agency had all wanted to hire me -- a Filipino -- permanently. Not that I'm an idiot nor will it cost them less... No, senor. It's because I do my job professionally. Filipinos are honest, efficient workers. Period. I worked exclusively for my greedy broker (who's infected with the tsao mentality), working only temporarily for the other employers (Yup, that's illegal. I was at the mercy of my agent -- "Taiwan --Mei Yo Nama Wan" article). When I defiantly challenged the shrewd agency owner, I was more than happy to be sent back home... that's simply "shoving the bread-and-butter" up my agent's ass. Lesson learned: The master sings high praises of you, "selling" you to his clients, family, and friends at every possible opportunity, giving you false hopes of high salary while encouraging you to work your butt off and pushing you harder and closer to workaholic hell, as if your job's the only most important thing in the world that your life depends on it, never mind the damage it's doing to your well-being -- physically, mentally, emotionally, socially. At the slightest sign of defiance (i.e., you're sick you can't work or you want a day-off after a year of non-stop work), you're given a crack of the whip, you could be terminated. Ask why you're not getting the right amount of salary, you're told you have no right to question how you're being paid. It sounds like it's a practice from the dark ages but it's actually happening everywhere. It happened to me in Taiwan. Though the severity was less than Taiwan's, it happened to me in the western world with my previous slave-driver boss who had been shortchanging me. Darn right, she's got the tsao mentality so I shove my bread-and-butter at her throat and quit my job. With my current Canadian bread-and-butter, it's way, way creamier and healthier. ;-D

No matter how big a master you think you are, if you step on my pinky toe or blow on my tribe's face with your stinky breath, you have something coming... and it's definitely not sweet words, cheap old Tsao. Being a master doesn't give one the authority to step on a servant's rights. Creatures with the tsao mentality need a brain overhaul. If Filipinos are such an insignificant, worthless lot to Tsao why then are our services in such high demand in Hong Kong and China (not to mention other nations)? Why can't they just hire local workers which would cost them way cheaper (RMB500/month) than hiring an OFW (HK$3500+/month)? It's the quality of work we do. It's the respect we have of ourselves (OFWs), of our job (bread and butter), of our employers (masters). Tsao doesn't seem to know anything about respect. And if he's afraid his article could be misinterpreted he should stick to his mother tongue and not write in English.

I thank my lucky stars I hadn't been employed by someone of a tsao mentality in Hong Kong. My big-hearted, open-minded Chinese employer encouraged openness, creativeness, and couldn't stand idiocy. It's in my 5-plus years of working for her that I completely understood why people like her prefer to hire Filipinos instead of other nationalities. More than a dozen locals got the sack from my former boss in just a span of 2 years. There are way much more of the enlightened Chinese souls than that of the tsao mentality kind. ChipTsao wasn't speaking for the entire Chinese race. He was speaking for himself. Furthermore, his writing voice was severely out of tune, and he stepped out of line. Tsao's chosen words simply reek of racism. Filipinos will not simply stand back and let him flex his muscles at us!

Author: Joy Marqueses

*Published in TF Newsmag (April 2009 Hong Kong Issue)

Letting Go

2009-02-21T11:31:00.000-08:00

I saw myself walking down the beach; my feet were touching the floury sand, hand in hand with the cold and lonely night.

I was all alone...

As another puff of freezing wind blew my face, tears start rolling down my cheeks. I wonder why I cried when I was alone.

I sat on the sand and pondered for answer but all I heard was silence. I could not understand why up to now I still have not learned to be alone. The tears I felt falling on my cheeks was profuse they rolled continuously.

Suddenly, I heard a voice calling. It called my name. I looked back. It was a blur, all I saw was a man from a distance waving to me. And as he drew near me, he smiled while putting his arms around my shoulders. I felt so weird, but I gave in, for I needed a friend at that time. We went walking with our hands clasped together. The grip of his hands was strong, so strong to catch me if I fall.

He led me to a house, full of daffodils around the ground. The scent of the fresh green grass swayed and danced in the wind. I felt the warm caress of the air as I entered the house full of glaring lights. My spirit exalted. The coldness I felt slowly faded as the warmth of joy greeted me.

He took my hand and showed me around the house. It was full of people dancing,with smiles gleaming on their faces. Everyone was happy and I was happy too.

I danced all night with the man I met on the beach. His eyes stared like an angel. Though he was a stranger, all that mattered was the gladness he gave me. He was like a prince, he held me differently, in my mind and in my heart, and I knew I would fall for him.

We stopped dancing, and went out from the house. He asked me to the grass while looking at the stars. He turned to me, as if he wanted to say something. He held my hand tightly, stroked my hair and touched my face. I gave him a bemusing look. Then the music from the house stopped. A big roar was heard from the sky, then, he placed his arms around me and gave a kiss and cheerful smile and said, "It's gonna be okay, I'm here!"

I closed my eyes to feel him and tried to retain this in my heart.

I opened my eyes and found myself lying in the beach. There was no house, no daffodils, no dancing people, and worst still, he was not there.

I thought I had him.... I was wrong. Tears began to roll down, I closed my eyes to stop them from falling and was startled because I felt his lips on my forehead. I opened my eyes excitedly. Only to find out he was not with me. Again, I am alone.

I closed my eyes again and felt his presence so passionately. Then, I woke up from my dream.

This morning, I understood why I needed to cry. It was the pain of letting go, of realizing that he was just a dream and can never be true.

I want to stay and wait for his presence but it is time for me to let go and accept that he was just a dream, my fantasy. Yet I am thankful, for in my loneliness he came and made me feel he was right for me -- forever in my dreams.

Author: Feme Delmonte

The One

2009-02-01T21:21:00.000-08:00

"This story of overseas Workers, Migrant labor, Contract Labor – however they may be labeled – people looking for a better opportunity at HONEST LABOR- seems similar to the Silver People here in Panama. People are still searching for relatives lost a century ago when they took ship to come to Panama to work on the Panama Canal – never to be heard from again." -- Lydia Cortes Reid, Editor, The Silver People Chronicle

The caption above is a comment from the Editor of The Silver People Chronicle based in Panama who read my article "Casualties of War" (Knockin' on Heaven's Door, TF November edition) through the blog site of our Editorial Assistant, Joy Marqueses. As an outspoken critic of the ills of the Philippine Society – of how badly it has turned out through the years – I felt sad yet somehow elated of what Ms Reid is trying to impart. Sad because as Overseas Workers we can relate partly to what Ms Reid's migrant worker-ancestors' tragic experiences had 100 years ago and yet elated because at least nowadays even if we have "fallen" workers, modern technology allow us to identify causes of their misfortunes and transport their remains back home. Napakasakit talagang mawalan ng minamahal, subalit mas masakit and 'di mo man lang masilayan and kanyang labi, 'di ba? One of my cousin back in the 70's was a seaman and was declared missing when their ship sunk somewhere in the seas of Africa. Up to this day, my Aunt refuses to believe that he died and she never stopped dreaming that one day my cousin, Eddie, will come back.

As I started my career in publication 5 years ago, I never stopped dreaming too. I am still hoping that my thoughts, especially my clamor for decent and sincere governance from our leaders back home, would somehow inspire many of my co-workers to be vocal and express their sentiments too. I am also fully aware of what little we could achieve because of our limitations. Our voices of gripes might not even reach the gates of Malacanang. As I begin to contemplate that perhaps our generation of OFWs is not destined to start the "wind of change" that our country badly needs to get back to its feet, something promising happened a month ago that renewed my hopes.

One Sunday afternoon of December 21, 2009 in North Point, being one the invited guests in the celebration of the 16^th Anniversary of the Bohol Hong Kong Association headed by Flor Virtoudazo, I was by chance arranged to sit beside their special guest – Cesar Montano and his wife Sunshine Cruz. My short chat with Cesar Montano brought surprising realities of our bloodlines – he is my cousin – somewhere in the 3^rd or 4^th degree. However, my amusement did not stop there for when he took the stage, to everybody's delight, he spoke not just of mere celebrity stuff to entertain the HK Boholanos & their visitors but rather about his humble beginnings; his plans for his home province – Bohol; his vision for the youth and so on. I was not only impressed. I was mesmerized not by his celebrity charm but rather his intellect and the strong values that is rare among stars of his stature.

A natural-born Leader
A quiet dinner with the couple the following night revealed more interesting character of the man. He spoke of his priority projects to build sporting facilities for kids, believing that a young man's "idle mind is a devil's workshop". His ideas of how to transform Bohol into a premier tourist destination and investment paradise is not only practical but realistic in my view. After all, he has a reputable track record in Bohol when he filmed his much acclaimed movie: "Panaghoy sa Suba" entirely in Bohol - bringing prestige and revenues to this island-province. His impressive knowledge in Philippine history surprised us at the dinner table that night. His outstanding portrayal of Jose Rizal must have rubbed him that special aura of nationalism and pride. A non-smoker and non-drinker, he turned down a lucrative endorsement from a giant alcoholic drink industry to the tune of P10million pesos. His explanation was simple, "How can I reprimand my children when I see them smoking or drinking if they would counter by saying that I endorse those products to the public".

This man has balls.
Since he publicly declared his intentions to run as governor of Bohol, I asked him in an alarming tone the dangers he will be facing especially from the more established political clans in the province. To which he replied; "Sinabihan ko sila (referring to Bohol's local politicos) na I will work with them as long as they invest their wealth and create jobs for our people. But once, they exploit its resources and bring elsewhere its revenues, I will fight them!" Behind that baby face and sweet smile is a fighter.

A fighter for OFWs
Being critical of the government and consistently encouraging my fellow OFWs to voice out their dissatisfaction to the excesses of our government, I cannot resist from pouring my sentiments to "Buboy". I told him that many among us feel funny about being labeled "Bagong Bayani". The truth is parang pang-uto lang ng mga politico. We don't feel its meaning when we go home. Many among us, especially those from the domestic workers' sector, still suffer the same humiliation and discrimination at the arrival sa airport pa lang. We are victims of impractical policies and bureaucratic red tapes tuwing umuuwi at umaalis. Again, to my surprise, Buboy talks about the need for a strong OFW body that could represent its interest in the higher echelon of the government (tulad ng sa Kongreso). Kailangan din daw na magkaroon ng isang seryosong pananaliksik kung paano makapagtapos ang mga undergrads o kaya'y makapag-take ng board ang mga hindi pa lisensyado habang nasa "Tour of Duty". Kung ano-ano pa raw na re-integration program ang pinagkakagastusan, samantalang kung magagawang mapagtatapos ang mga "undergrads at underboards", the country will not only benefit from their professional skills but will also create more business as returning OFWs are financially capable of creating medium-size businesses.

For more than 30 years that I lived my life as an OFW, my eyes have painfully witnessed the consistent downslide of our economy and the slow degradation of our moral values. There are times that I am convinced that the "salvation" of our country's woes that can only be delivered by a leader of exceptional character will not be seen in my generation. Today, I stand to be corrected. Cesar "Buboy" Montano is one leader we can bet our children's future and now I believe more than ever that there are more of his kind. Fight for our cause, Buboy, and we will fight for you! You are THE ONE – Mabuhay!

Author: Tony Bartolome
*Published in True Friends Newsmag (January 2009 issue)

Hidden Value

2009-01-31T22:21:00.000-08:00

Easy come, easy go. On the contrary, ang pinaghirapan 'di madaling kalimutan. We value things by the hardships that we take. In fact, what rewards us more than the challenges that entail is the feeling of worth that we earn. There are no shortcuts to precious-happy ends.

Gold miners are well known for their unsurpassed optimistic persistence. Exploration includes site discovery, preparation, ground testing and working tirelessly as a team, dig down the deepest depth of the earth, gather, pulverize, sieve until a sign of ore appears… in it stores endless treasures of great value, the reward of their hard labor. Similar procedures apply in finding the hidden value of things or in any relationship.

Yesterday, I told Cherry siya ang pinakamakulit na nakilala ko sa buong mundo. She reminded me, "I cherish you my dear, kapag ako ay hindi na nangungulit sa 'yo dalawa lang ang ibig sabihain non; either give up na ako sa 'yo or namayapa na ako." Alive and true, obviously for so many years, she considered the benefits of remaining engaged as opposed to slowly departing our friendship. She thinks less about the pains and disappointments that I gave when I openly contradict her opinions, honestly criticize her works, and sometimes I'm coincidentally unavailable to attend her demands or needs. Instead, she ponders more about the good times, the meaningful memories, ideals, and goals that bring and hold us together. She is always understanding and generous while I try to make up or reciprocate. Cousin Peachy just came from a happy-loving relationship that turned into war and hate. Does she care to repair the damage? Certainly, kung sana may panghihinayang but then she says, "We cannot choose people that enter our life but we can always choose the ones that we want to stay." In life, I realized that people we meet are there for a purpose. Some are there to use you, to teach you, bring out the better if not the best in you. Some may cause you pain and heartaches but one must learn to move on, to let go of the people who can't treat you right and hold on to those who can love you back and see your worth. After all, life isn't about meeting people but finding relationships that lasts.

More reasons than we can count, sometimes bad things happen to good relationships. Miscommunications, blames and excuses can lead tempers to flare, or people to quietly drift apart, feel hurt, let down, abandoned, frustrated or whatsoever. Do we invest right enough time, effort and reasons to the right person to find high value? It pays to know deeper than the surface, to look closely beneath the layers where gems await to be discovered. Ninang Mae tells me "In a world full of strangers, where life isn't perfect, it's a wonderful blessing to have found people who are sensible to hear your thanks or complaints for the day. Friends who can read you inside-out without difficulty finding language to explain. Friends who know their place in you and you know where you stand, never taking for granted ..for real friends cherish you and stay with you in your worst or even when the rest of the world are gone."

Of relationship, we are all hunters. I for one, when hunting gets tough and difficult and I feel like approaching the end of my string, I find more reason to hold on, give it another try. I may give a little extra but it's worth especially when someone say, "I don't want to lose you as my sister." That surely creeps to the treasure box of my heart, adding more precious gifts in life. I honor friendship by the law of trust and transparency. I let them know my fears, my weirdest dreams and that I love nature, good books, danish bread, ikebana, and Kris Aquino. Same way, I don't try to change them but I accept them for who they are. Friends are treasures more precious than diamonds.

Did you meet one today? Stay put to find the hidden gold then polish to shine. To discover and be discovered is worth more than the greatest treasures of a lifetime. Enjoy hunting!

Author: Annabelle Libao
*Published in True Friends Newsmag (January 2009 issue)

Konsensiya

2009-01-30T20:44:00.000-08:00

KUNG HEI FAT CHOY sa mga kababayan natin. Pagnanakaw – marami na ang kasong ganito hindi lang dito sa Hong Kong kundi pati na rin sa iba't ibang sulok ng daigdig. Bakit nga ba may nag-nanakaw o mandurukot? Dahil kaya sa hirap, sakit na niya ang pag-nanakaw o wala siyang magawa sa buhay niya kaya niya nagagawang magnakaw o baka kaya naman galit siya sa taon na pinag-nakawan niya.

Tulad na lang sa Worldwide, nag-kalat ang mga kawatan; hindi lang mga shop ang ninanakawan kundi pati mga kapwa kababayan natin na alam na maraming dalang pera dahil kakasuweldo pa lamang at magpapadala sa kanilang pamilya. Hindi ba kayo na- kukonsensiya sa ginagawa ninyo? Sa masama mong ugali na nag-nanakaw ka ng pinaghirapan ng iba! Hindi ba ninyo naisip na pinaghirapan at kinita mula sa pawis at dugo ng ating kababayan ang ninanakaw ninyo? Kung kapit man sa patalim ang dahilan ninyong mga kawatan, isaalang-alang naman sana ninyo ang bagay na ninanakaw o dinudukutan ninyo. Naisip ba ninyo kung ano balik niyan? Kung hindi man sa iyo mismo ang balik niyan, sa pamilya mo babalik ang mga ginawa mo. Iyon ay ang tinatawag na KARMA. Inisip mo man lang ba kung tama ang ginagawa mo? Pero sabagay kung talagang gawain mo na ito, manhid ka na talaga o wala ka ng konsensiya sa ganoong bagay. Hindi mo na iisipin kung ano kahihinatnan ng ginawa mo! Ano kayang mukha ang ipapakita mo sa pamilya mo kung sakaling ipinapulis ka dahil sa pagnanakaw? Sabagay sosyal naman ang dating dahil you become an international shoplifter. Yun nga lang wala ka na ring trabaho, kaya goodbye Hong Kong ka na rin.

Sa mga kapwa natin OFW porke't hindi tinitignan ni amo ang listahan, sige ang sulat ng mga pinamamalengke kahit hindi naman binili. Dinadagdagan at pinapalaki ang presyo ng pinamimili maka-ipon lang ng pambili ng phonecard na pantawag sa pamilya nila o sa mga boyfriend nila sa ibang lugar. Matauhan ka naman sa ginagawa mong pangungupit o makonsensiya ka naman dahil may pamilya kang tao sa Pilipinas. Sila dapat ang isipin mo hindi iyong kung sino-sinong ka-text mo. Mayroong nagsasabing, "hindi naman kami kasal kaya okey lang na makipag-boyfriend kahit ilan" pero takot naman malaman ng asawa sa Pilipinas. Tapos pag wala ng money na ipinapadala iyong boyfriend, say goodbye na rin. Ang pangunguwarta at pangungupit ay walang pinag-kaiba sa pag-nanakaw.

Magkatulad din iyan. Tayong may pamilya na sa ating Inang bayan, pumunta tayo dito para pagandahin natin ang ating buhay; isipin natin kung paano natin itataguyod ang ating pamilya. Hindi natutulog ang Diyos. Lahat ng galaw natin ay alam Niya. If we do something bad expect that in the end you will be the one who suffer. We are not perfect but if we want to be one, we can.

Author: Ed Roquel
*Published in True Friends Newsmag (January 2009 issue)

Career In Information Technology & Communication (I.C.T.)

2009-01-29T14:06:00.000-08:00

"Do you still have a career in I.C.T?" When computer technology started during the early stages of our modern present times, the small group of people who are knowledgeable in computer started as a sub-group or sub-team of either under the administration department, or finance & accounting department, or engineering department.

The small section turned into and became a computer department as a separate entity, during the transformation and recognition of its importance and functionality. Nowadays, the whole computer or I.T. department could be the whole company itself. The company's business pertains to I.T. solutions or services for another company requiring their skills and technology.

Where and what is then the integration career in I.T. as many of you have asked. The answer varies and dependent on the requirement of certain companies, also your qualification, your age and most important your computer skills. Your know-how gives a great deal since it is directly related to your experience.

Even if you are not working in a company but uses the computer system at home or even at the computer school, at computer rental, or Internet café, it adds up to your experience. All you need to do is apply or continue practicing several techniques using specific computer software implemented for everyday personal use.

Back to our original questions, do you still have a career in I.C.T.? The answer is both yes and no. When I say YES, you should start at a younger age, let's say early 20's (20-25 years old) by learning a special skill, like applying your college degree knowledge or start to master computer related application. Example of which is web page designing, learning accounting system (even if you are not an accountant), learn and master a computer language for programming and developing software. But, when I say NO it means, it will not be a career anymore because you will no longer work for somebody or in a company but work for yourself on your own company, all you need is apply what you learn in your computer lessons.

If you are not yet convince to study with us why don't you just try us because what you will learn will be beneficial as your background and experience. Other reason they keep saying is that "I am too old already and let my children do it for me." But, don't you realize that they (your kids) do not have that time to spend with you teaching, so why not do it yourself and learn yourself the intricacies of computer technology. And, why don't you follow others that they are the one being asked by their kids because they are more knowledgeable in computer than their kids. Isn't it it's a better feeling that you are the one teaching your kids than your kids is the one teaching you.

Just follow our advice and undergo our tutorial service, a service to our co-Filipino's for a better Philippine citizen, will you allow non-Filipinos to develop their computer skills ahead of us again? A question I leave to you to answer and digest.

Author: Dennis Madlangbayan
*Published in True Friends Newsmag (January 2009 issue)

Pakialam (Mensahe Sa Tula)

2009-01-28T22:15:00.000-08:00

Walang masama sa pagbibigay ng payo
Lalo na kung ito'y nagbuhat sa puso
Lagyan din ng limitasyon pananalita mo
Magkakaiba ang damdamin ng lahat ng tao.

Minsan di mo alam, nakakasakit ka
Akala mo ok, pero hindi sa kanya
Tumahimik ka lang kung may napupuna
Huwag manghimasok sa buhay ng iba.

Ang buhay ng kapwa ang laging paksa
Sa mga usapan ng walang magawa
Tingnan ang sarili at ika'y mahiya
Huwag kang makialam, lalo na ang manira.

Kayrami ng taong may ganyang ugali
Kapag walang ginulo ay di mapakali
Hindi nakikita ang pagkakamali
Manahimik kana lang d'yan sa isang tabi.

Ang lahat ng tao ay may karapatan
Na gawin ang gusto sa kanyang paraan
Kung hindi sang-ayon, tumingin kana lang
Ang mahalaga, hindi ka naaapektuhan.

Sa mga natamaan, pasensya na po
Masasaktan ka lang kung ito'y gawain mo
Sa mga nabiktima, naku, hayaan mo
Babalik din sa kanila, maling ginawa sa iyo.

Ang aking mensahe sana ay makarating
Sa mga taong walang ibang gawain
Kundi makialam, manakit ng damdamin
Umayos ka naman, sarili ang atupagin.

Author: Zyrel

*Published in True Friends Newsmag (December 2008 issue)

Kalusugan Ay Kayamanan

2009-01-28T15:40:00.000-08:00

Sa buwang ito, bibigyan ko po ng pansin ang mga natatanggap kong mga katanungan sa text o panulat galing sa aking mga taga-subaybay at mambabasa, na pawang nagtatanong ukol sa kanilang KAGANDAHAN. Sa unang mga palatandaan ng pagkulubot ng mukha, marami sa ating mga kababaihan ang natataranta at nag-aalala. Biglang nararamdaman natin ang pagtanda at paglipas ng ating kasibulan. Inaalala na lamang ang lumipas na panahong nawala ang ating kabataan. Sa kabilang banda naman, may mga kababaihang may edad na subalit mukhang bata pa ang hitsura. Dalawang bagay lamang ito: maaaring sa tulong ng siyensiya o sila ang mga kababaihang hindi nilalabanan ang natural na nangyayari sa kanilang katawan, bagkus ito ay tinatanggap nila ng maluwag sa kanilang kalooban at inaalam ang tamang pangangalaga sa kanilang balat at katawan.

Karamihan sa mga kababaihan sa ngayon bata man o matanda ay pawang may ipinapahid na kung anu-ano sa mukha (cream, lotion, astringent at iba pa). Ito raw ay upang mapanatili ang kasariwaan at kagandahang panlabas. Sa mga taong umaasa sa mga nabanggit na kosmetikong ito—walang "magic potion" o "cream" ang makakapag-alis ng mga kulubot o ano pang mga imperpekto sa mukha tulad ng pekas. Gaano man kamahal ang mga ito, gaano man karami ang ilagay mo hindi pa rin nito mapapanatili ang kabataang inaasam mo ng pang habang panahon. NGUNIT, ang pagpapanatili ng kagandahan ay maaaring makamit at mapasaiyo ng mas matagal pang panahon. Maging disiplinado lamang at magkaroon ng likas na kagalakan at kasiyahan sa iyong pananaw sa buhay.

Paano ba tayo magiging disiplinado? Simple lamang ito. Una sa lahat ay sa ating pang araw-araw na pagkain. Habang tayo ay nagkaka-edad, humihina na ang ating metabolismo. Hindi na ito tulad noong mga "teenagers" pa lamang tayo. Noon talaga, maaari tayong kumain ng kumain hanggang kaya at ibig; sapagka't hindi naman natin napapansin ang mga pagbabago sa ating katawan. Kumbaga, kahit anong gana natin sa pagkain, kay dali pa ring matunaw ng ating kinakain kaya ating napapanatili ang ating "slim" na pangangatawan. Subalit, sa pagsampa ng mga edad na 35 pataas, ang ating "hormone" na responsable sa magandang metabolismo ng ating katawan ay humihina na at hindi na rin aktibo, kaya tumataba na tayo at unti-unting nakakadiskubre ng mga linya sa ating mukha at may mga hindi kanais-nais na "cellulite" sa ating buong katawan. Ang pagpapanatili ng slim na katawan ay malaki ang maitutulong kung ibig nating mapanatili ang ating kabataan. Kapag kasi tumataba o mataba tayo, ang unang nangyayari ay nagmumukha tayong may edad na. Ikalawa, naririyan na ang mga "cellulites" na "stored fats" sa ating katawan na nagbubuo-buo dahil masyadong mabagal ang ating mga kilos gawa ng mabigat ang pakiramdam. Kailangan nating imintina ang liksi ng ating katawan.

Sa pagdagdag ng edad mas kailangan natin ng ehersisyo. Ang kaso mo, masarap daw kumain, kahit ako ay hirap na hirap ding imantini ang aking "ideal weight". Hindi sana ito mahirap gawin kung may determinasyon at disiplina tayo sa ating katawan upang mapanatili ang ating liksi at lakas. Para huwag mahirapan, ugaliing maglakad sa umaga, kung ang iyong tinutuluyan ay nasa ikatlo o ikaapat na palapag isang magandang ehersisyo din kung ikaw ay maghahagdan na lamang huwag ka lang magdala ng marami. Ugaliin ang sadyang paglalakad—kung ang iyong pupuntahan ay malapit lamang at may oras ka pa. Labing-lima hanggang dalawampung minutong paglalakad ay mainam sa ating mga nagkaka-edad.

Kumain lamang paunti-unti. Sadya itong mainam kaysa biglang pagkain ng marami sa tatlong beses sa maghapon; maaaring kumain ng paunti-unti kahit ilang ulit sa maghapon. Ang ating panunaw ay hindi na kasing bilis gumiling tulad ng dati. Sa pag-aalaga sa mukha, pumili ng sabon at "cream" na ipapahid upang hindi matuyuan ang balat. Kailangang "moisturizing" ito at may "Vitamin E" at "Collagen". Ang paglalagay ng kolorete o "make-up" ay gawing paminsan-minsan na lamang o ayon sa okasyon; at hangga't maaari ay mas mainam na iwasan ito dahil sa mga kemikal na napapaloob dito. "Moisturizing" ang kailangan sa panahong ito ng nagkaka-edad. Ito ay mainam din laban sa klima (sobrang init, sobrang lamig o ang tinatatawag na UV "ultra-violet"). Malaki ang maitutulong nito upang hindi agad maglabasan ang mga linya sa mukha. Gawin ninyo ito, pati ang pagmamantini ng "ideal weight", makikita at mararamdaman natin ang buting dulot nito. Higit siyempre sa lahat, ang magkaroon ng bukal na kaligayahang nagmumula sa kaibuturan ng ating puso. Kahit gaano karaming kolorete ang ipahid natin sa ating mukha, kahit gaano kamahal, kahit na gaano kabantog ang tatak nito hindi kayang itago ang mukhang nagdanas ng hirap. Kulapulan mo man ng Cover Mark o Estee Lauder o Mark Spencer at iba pang mamahaling make-up ang iyong mukha, hindi ka naman maligaya, wala rin itong saysay. Ang panghuli, magkaroon ng walong oras na tulog at pahinga. Ito ang "best beauty treatment" na maaaring makuha ninuman ng libre.

Ito po ang inyong lingkod Ines A. David na nagpapasalamat na muli sa aking mga taga-subaybay sa aking kolum. Nagpapasalamat din ako sa sumulat sa akin na taga-Discovery Bay na nagtatanong tungkol sa almoranas. Ikaw ay aking inaanyayahang subukan ang ating "cleansing" sa pamamagitan ng Chlorophyllwith guarana juice. Sa mga tumatangkilik at patuloy na gumagamit ng "detoxifying process" ng Chlorophyll with Guarana Juice na nagpapalakas ng ating "immune booster" at panlaban sa sakit. Ang ating DYNATONIC na nagpapalakas sa ating bato, pantog at "colon". Sa ating mga "power coffee users" Kacif Fatimah, Tongkat Ali at Ganoderma, maraming salamat po sa inyong lahat!

Author: Ines David
*Published in True Friends Newsmag (December 2008 issue)

Away In A Manger

2009-01-25T14:52:00.000-08:00

Though I used to celebrate many occasions in life away from family nothing beats the emptiness I felt as Christmas approaches the month of December 2006. I deeply missed home and for the first time I will be spending the season without my children.

I went to Tsim Sha Tsui for a little gift-shopping then headed at the Grand Promenade to have snack, savour a good book, relax my aching legs and enjoy the beauty of the harbour. Slight rain drizzled the air and the place was crowded. I settled at one of the benches, and I noticed that my seatmate –a Filipina – was doing some serious observation of the festive decor. She was holding a sketch pad and a well pointed pencil. I'd forgotten how our conversation started but I will always remember our warm sharings. I'd known that she is a widow with 3 children left in Bulacan under the care of a relative who offered them refuge when they left Lanao – grieving, broke, hopeless and in need of shelter and justice. It's been 11 years but memory shrouded her with pain as she related to me the terrifying day when the life of her husband was taken – tortured to death in front of her and her children.

"It was traumatic and I know that we can never regain our losses but I'm thankful for the opportunity to rebuild our future making sure we will not be homeless and hopeless forever. Well, I take drawing as a therapy to express my emotions, and I always sent them to my children, this way I feel closer to home." Rose (her name) said.

To let her know that many shares in her affliction, I told her about the story of a respected High School head-teacher who was murdered in a bus stop cafeteria on her way to Baguio City to attend a seminar and the hopelessness of a church-mate whose father and brother were framed of the crime, sentenced to life imprisonment with no opportunity for a fair trial.

We talked about many things, almost everything under the sun and we finished our foods. Darkness fell, and we said goodbye. Surprisingly, she gave me her work of art. I was deeply touched, my tears dropped as I moved closer to embrace her... on the paper the "Nativity" scene was drawn skillfully. The night was cold and crisp. I passed Nathan Road and admired the peace and grandeur of brightly lit decors of the season. Alone and away from home, I found a place for the manger (courtesy of Rose) in my room. Christmas to me is no longer bleak and barren. There on my wall breathing with a message of love, hope, and calmness is a wonderful gift of the Holy Family – Jesus – once a homeless fellow.

As the US President-elect Barack Obama was delivering his victory speech in Chicago, equality and democracy filled every American as they made historical change having their first black President. And it is also inspiring to note just recently, that the mainland authorities extended protection to rescue thousands of Chinese residents and travelers to fly back home for safety from the chaotic situation in Thailand.

Our country is a place of beauty, and agricultural richness. Majority back home are trying to make a living from the land that has never paid them well, while millions toil overseas hoping for a change of fate. I wonder what life could be for those OFWs who do menial labour, constantly facing danger and abuse, those who never got the chance to enjoy prosperity, freedom and family presence? Have our leaders enforced enough measures to protect our welfare and rights?

I wonder what future lies in our country as issues of controversy, scams, allegations of graft and corruption never seemed to run out. Like Rose, and many others who are "Casualties Of War", as our dear Editor said (TF November Issue), still continue to fight an invisible enemy with no territorial boundaries. These "Casualties" hungers for truth, equality, security, and opportunity.

Some parts of our country is blessed by effective, ethical leaders like Ed Panlilio and Grace Padaca of Isabela. Will there be more of them? Will there be more leaders, lawmakers and law-enforcers who will work earnestly to uplift our economy, restore our peace and security and regain the many losses of our sufferings? In and outside our country, we dream and pray.

Author: Annabelle Libao
*Published in True Friends Newsmag (December 2008 issue)

O Ikaw! Tsismosa Ka Ba?

2009-01-19T21:59:00.000-08:00

Tsismis is my business. Ito ang nagiging libangan na ng mga Pilipino na ang pinag-uusapan ay ang buhay ng may buhay dito sa Hong Kong. Ang ugali sa Pilipinas dinadala hanggang dito. Hindi mo malaman kung naiingit lang sila sa taong kanilang pinag-uusapan o gusto lang nilang siraan ang buhay ng tao. Wala naman sigurong masama kung makipagkuwentuhan lang basta huwag lang ang pinakikialam ay iyong buhay ng iba. Sabi nga, "Who are you to judge the life I live? I'm not perfect, and I don't live to be. But before you start pointing fingers at others, make sure your hands are clean."

Ano ba ang nakukuha natin sa ginagawa nating pakikialam sa buhay ng iba? Wala naman tayong mapapala nito. Kung may narinig kang kuwento baka naman pwedeng huwag mo ng ipamalita sa iba. Dahil ang kulang baka madagdagan pa. At isa pa masama ang dating nito sa taong pinag-uusapan. Eh, ano kung may ginawa iyong tao? Buhay niya iyon eh. Alam naman niya na mali na ang ginagawa niya, kaya 'di na dapat para siya ay i-tsismis.

Oh ikaw ba naman na nag-kukuwento perpekto ka ba? Wala ka bang ginagawang kababalaghan Dahil lang sa tsismis marami ang buhay na nasisira maraming pamilya ang nawawasak kasi nadadala sa sabi-sabi ng iba. Lalo na iyong mga kababayan nating galing sa i-isang baryo na nag-sisiraan. na maayos natin ang mali hindi naman nagkakaganoon, dahil lalo lang nating dinadagdagan. Kumbaga sa isang pelikula kung may bida, may kontra bida. Ganyan ang tsismis kung may nagbibida na nagtsi-tsismis, may nakikinig, 'di ba? O kaya sabihin na lang sa nagkukuwento, iba na lang kaya ang pag-usapan natin? Wala naman tayong mapupulot o mapapala diyan.

Iyan ang dapat na gawin, bilang kagandahang-asal. Pero talaga lang, para sa mga kapwa natin kababayan na mahilig mag-tsismis, 'pag may naririnig siya tungkol sa iba, 'di na mapakali kung hindi ikuwento sa iba. Doon na nagsisimula ang away at hindi pagkakaintindihan. Kaya kung minsan kahit na mismong malapit na kaibigan o kasambahay mo lang tsini-tsismis mo ang buhay niya. Kung ano ang kinuwento niya sa iyo, ikinuwento mo na rin sa iba. Paano kaya kung ikaw naman ang pagkuwentuhan ano naman kaya mararamdaman mo? 'Di ba masakit o nakakahiya? So, it's better na i-zipper your mouth na lang. Kung ano man ang nakita mo o narinig tumahimik ka nalang at huwag mo ng pakialaman ang buhay ng kapwa mo dahil hindi tayo perpekto at lahat naman tayo ay may kasalanan. Kaya wala tayong karapatang mang-husga sa ating kapwa.

O, mga minamahal kong mga readers, magsama-sama tayo sa nalalapit na kaarawan ng Anak ng Ating Poong Maykapal. At tayo ay dumalanging nawa'y maging maayos ang buhay natin dito. At baguhin na natin ang hindi magandang asal na taglay. Maligayang pasko at manigong bagong taon!

Author: Ed Roquel

*Published in True Friends Newsmag (December 2008 issue)

Multi-Tasking -- OFWs' Tool For A Progressive Future

2009-01-18T22:21:00.000-08:00

As the year's end approaches, I look back in retrospect and somehow feel mixed emotions for the year that was. While I found myself busy all year long which is truly a blessing, many of my acquaintances are not fortunate enough to find such good opportunities. The current global financial crisis is undoubtedly the major culprit to this gloomy forecast that lies above our heads. But let us not forget that part of the misfortunes which befell us is a direct result of our inaction to improve our own selves. OFWs' who do not even try to take the extra mile in upgrading their skills or even search their inner selves of their God-given talents are the ones that easily loses heart when "the going gets tough"

Of the many terminologies brought to us by the dawning of the computer age (i.e. Word Processor, Scanning, Surfing, ISPs, etc…), "multi-tasking" is perhaps the most appropriate function that we, as OFWs, must practice. I am a strong believer and practitioner of the old adage that "Chance favors the prepared mind". Many among us never knew that opportunities came simply because they were not up to it. In this critical time, those who have continuously and consistently armed themselves with additional skills are the ones that do not worry of the days ahead. That is why I am proud of True Friends' columnists that in spite of their restricted time and movement, the strong and positive character they display continue to serve as an inspiration to many.

Let me cite to you an example. One of TFs' regular contributor enjoys chatting in the net just like all the rest. But instead of searching for "papas" or "cyber-mates", she found professionals and decent people. One is a journalist based in the Middle East. The friendship is pretty healthy that when the journalist got the chance for a business trip to Hong Kong, the guy asked her to be the guide. The trip was officially sponsored by a Middle East Journalists group and was received accordingly by a local Hong Kong Journalists' group. After the first trip, the guy made a second trip purposely to write a book about Hong Kong and assigned our True Friends' contributor as a researcher. Kumita pa siya at may chance pang magtrabaho sa Middle East as a Skilled Worker. You see, we have the same chances, the same freedom and restrictions, yet some make it good and some don't. For me, I believe that it's the attitude that makes the difference.

I started learning computer works & literacy 10 years ago and like many others I thought I was too old for it. Look where it has taken me now. What I have become today with IT technology is no Cinderella Story. Long hours of back-breaking efforts exploring the intricacies of computer technology has given me another career and a promise of more opportunities that doesn't seem to end. I remember not so long ago that while many of my peers were spending most of their free time enjoying the games the computer has to offer, I was perfecting graphics application programs. While playing basketball was their means of relieving their stress – testing their physical strength to its limits that sometimes end up in bruises and enemies – I was walking around parks for contemplation and relaxation.

With a strong conviction that if I work longer hours than most and continuously upgrade my skills, I will surely have an edge, and so, in only a span of few years, I have proven it right. I do not worry so much of what lies ahead. How about you, do you?

Author: Tony Bartolome

*Published in True Friends Newsmag (December 2008 issue)

Housing, Scholarship, And Retirement Scheme For Low-Earning OFWs

2009-01-14T21:46:00.001-08:00

Sa atin sa Pilipinas tatlong social classes na pamumuhay ang pinoy, upper class, middle, at lower class. Karamihan sa atin na domestic helpers come from middle class at lower class. Sa status ng OFWs in Hong Kong, tatlong klase din sa tingin ko ang pamumuhay: Upper class are those pinoys who enjoy their earnings, run and own their business. Middle class pinoys are the employed professionals who enjoy all the benefits of their employment including the Right-Of-Abode. Lower class are the domestic helpers –- no matter kung ano man ang kurso mong tinapos, domestic helper ka pa rin. This “category” does not enjoy benefits such as right of abode at iba pa. The salary kung ano lang ang approved ng host country; working more than the minimum hours at usually discriminated kahit sa kapwa pinoy. If you don’t like your employer, you cannot change or look for another at anytime or else you will have to go home and start all over again. Ang domestic helpers are what I consider as low-earning OFWs. There are 3 major reasons why we went to work abroad. First, we want to have a decent house, secondly, mapag-aral ang mga anak at lastly, makapagtatag ng sariling negosyo. Kaya nang dumating dito sa Hong Kong ang Pangulo nuong Marso, realistic housing scheme for OFW ang pangunahing “request” ang hiningi namin. Sa $3,580 na sahod ng isang domestic helper, mahirap pa rin maglaan ng budget para sa isang decente na bahay. Ang 10 % down payment makes us hard to budget unless we have to make another extra loan from financing. Kahit ang pangulo nakita n’ya ang pang down-payment sa housing loan ang malaking balakid para ma-avail natin ang housing benefits. I am looking forward that real estate company will offer soon zero down-payment for housing program at gawing priority for low-income OFWs. Ang pamahalaan ay maraming scholarship program, but ilang porsyento ba sa mga low-income OFWs ang nakaka-avail nito? Parental absence is one major reason naman kung bakit karamihan sa mga anak ng OFWs cannot maintain the average grade required sa scholarship program. While our domestics helpers care for other families, napabayaan nila ang sariling pamilya. Ang programa ng pamahalaan sa scholarship program ay ‘di hamak na maliit para sa percentage number ng mga OFWs. Kaya mahirap hanapin ang success stories sa mga anak ng low-income OFWs na nasa nabanggit na program. Dapat maglaan ang pamahalaan spcecifically para lang sa mga anak ng low-income OFWs o di kaya isang programang vocational – being the least privileged among the OFWs that I mentioned above.

Sa Pilipinas, ano man ang sahod mo may nakalaan para sa iyong pagtanda. Sa ngayon wala pang programa ang gobyerno natin sa retirement scheme for OFWs. Sana isa rin ito sa pangunahing bagay na dapat nating tingnan sa ating pagtanda kung wala na tayong kakayahan sa pagtrabaho sa abroad. Mga Bagong Bayani ng Bayan, ano ang mangyayari sa ating 10 to 15 years from now? Kung ang SSS ay ang kasagutan, dapat gawin nating kaugalian magpamyembro at magset aside for the future. Sa mga pagpupulong karapatan natin makibahagi at magbigay ng opinion particularly ang pagdesign ng retirement scheme para sa atin na mga OFWs. Ang OWWA o Overseas Welfare Workers Administration ay ahensiya ng pamahalaan na dapat mag-isip para sa kapakanan nating mga OFWs. Nararapat lang nating tanungin sila kung anong klaseng mga welfare scheme ang mga nakadisenyo sa atin lalo na sa sampung taon o mahigit pang pagmimyembro. Naiplano na ba nila ito?

On my next article, I will be sharing my opinion on the following topics: Every month many new associations are born. Are these Associations or just simply social clubs? What are the purpose, objectives, missions and visions of these Associations? Ito ba ay makakatulong sa ating mga OFWs o dagdag gastos? Abangan sa next issue.

Author: Jojo Sapio

*Published in True Friends Newsmag (October 2008 issue)

Laws, Rules, And Codes

2009-01-14T21:31:00.000-08:00

Zyrel's "10 Batas Para Sa Bayaning OFW" spelled out the OFW soul's code. There are those among us who live as if they are the only inhabitants on earth, without care and respect on their fellow human beings. "Masagasaan na ang masagasaan, wala akong pakialam" seems to be their own selfish rule. This world's a lot better place if we could just subscribe to Zyrel's "10 Batas" and not hold on to the I-me-mine-myself attitude (an egoist's I-sight) we could be carrying around. We race ourselves to the top, raise ourselves up, but trample on some fellows in the process.

Sometimes, we're best heard when we stay "low" and not act as if we're high and mighty; stay gentle and not tyrannical; speak softly and not loud and screaming. Throwing our weight around, looking down our noses on anyone is the sort of attitude that will alienate us from everyone. When we're sensitive to other people's needs, we gain more respect. We get pushy and bossy and we sure will drive away the people around us.

The third law -- Iwasan ang pagiging makasarili -- brings us back to Ed Roquel's article "Panloloko" in October 2008. People tend to put material things above relationships. For the love of money, they use people. Should we not love people and use money, not the other way around? Many relationships have been ruined by money issues. Wala ng kai-kaibigan o kama-kamag-anak pagdating na sa pera. Friendships take the back seat. Materialism has taken precedence to what's much more essential -- human relationship.

"Maging magandang ehemplo sa iba," according to Zyrel. If you are a leader, what sort of example are you setting for your members? Do you lift their spirits up or do you crush their self-esteem just to make a point? Can you hold the group together or you simply let the group break apart? If you see yourself above everyone, there's no way that anyone can genuinely connect with you. It would be like treading on an egg shell communicating with a leader with a big ego. We make simple and innocent statements and we could be stepping on sensitive toes and feelings. How free could my thoughts be when talking to you if you are my leader? You build barriers, I keep my distance... that's the kind of attitude a leader gets from the members when something is utterly wrong with the leadership. Trust and respect is missing there.

There are unwritten rules in any relationship. An open heart and an open mind know just how to figure it all out.

Time to reflect on your soul's code...

Author: Joy Marqueses

*Published in True Friends Newsmag (January 2009 issue)

10 Batas Para Sa Mga Bayaning OFW

2009-01-08T23:42:00.000-08:00

1. MAGKAROON NG MALAWAK NA PANG UNAWA. Igalang ang paniniwala ng ating kapwa anuman ang relihiyon na ating kinaaniban.

2. MAGING MAGANDANG EHEMPLO SA IBA. Ipakita sa ibang tao na ang mga natututunan sa loob ng anumang kongregasyon ay nabubuhay sa araw-araw.

3. IWASAN ANG PAGIGING MAKASARILI. Huwag gamitin ang ating kapwa para sa pansariling kapakinabangan. Ang paghiram ng pera gamit ang pangalan ng ibang tao ay hindi makatwiran.

4. MAGLAAN NG SAPAT NA PANAHON SA SARILI. Gaano man karami ang ating trabaho sa araw araw, nararapat lamang na hindi napapabayaan ang ating kalusugan dahil ito ang ating puhunan sa ating mga paggawa.

5. MAGING TAPAT SA KABIYAK. Huwag pabayaang masira ang pamilya habang nasa malayong dako, mahalaga ang kumunikasyon at tiwala sa isa't isa.

6. MAGING POSITIBO. Harapin ang anumang problemang dumarating sa ating buhay. Sa halip na sumuko, gawin itong inspirasyon upang mas maging matatag.

7. IWASANG GUMASTOS NG HIGIT SA KINIKITA. Matutong magtabi ng sapat na halaga buhat sa ating pinagpaguran. Iwasang magwaladas ng pera sa mga walang kwentang bagay lalo na sa luho

8. MAGING TAPAT SA AMO. Iwasang matulog sa oras ng trabaho o gumawa ng ibang bagay na hindi dapat sa panahon ng paggawa, dahil ito ay isang uri ng pagnanakaw ng oras sa ating pinagsisilbihan.

9. MAGING MAPAGMALASAKIT. Iwasang gumawa ng mga bagay na maaring maging dahilan ng pagbagsak ng ating kapwa, mahalaga ang ating trabaho dahil sa ating pamilya na umaasa sa sa ating bansa.

10. HUWAG MAGING MAPAGMATAAS. Panatilihin ang magandang samahan, maging mapagkumbaba anuman ang ating narating. Huwag kalimutang magpasalamat sa Panginoong Diyos sa mga biyayang natatanggap natin sa araw araw.

Author: Zyrel

Simply Vergissmeinnicht

2009-01-06T15:22:00.000-08:00

I don't understand
I really don't
How you can be so ruthless
How you can be so heartless
Too many times
You hurt me
Yes, I am hurt
Very hurt
And it's so unbearable
I shed so many tears
Nobody could see
I hope it would stop
But the pain wouldn't go

Shame on you
For making me feel this way
How dare you play
Havoc on my emotions
How dare you make me feel
So helpless, so sad
And so frustrated

I treated you
As my friend
A real, true friend
Neither fault, nor foe
Could stop me
I trusted you
Shared my secrets with you
My ups and downs
And even my simple happiness
In all honesty
I never treated you otherwise
Nor I made you superior
Much less inferior from me
You are my equal

You wouldn't believe it
But my heart went with it
I was hoping
You would be one
Of my lifetime friends
Who would never let go
But all along
I was wrong
Maybe, just maybe
It wouldn't work

The fate lies
In your hands
In your choices
Not mine
Every painful word
Every cutting look
Brings me on the edge
Trying me too far
Pushing me too hard
Somehow, I am hoping
You don't mean
Everything you're doing

I am praying
You are just showing me
Your true identity
But I am me
No amount of pain
Could change me
The way I am
Because I am unique

Sometimes, just sometimes
I am thinking
That it is absurd
To expect too much
From you
Who are you anyway?
I don't even know
What's going on
You would just give me
Your deadly looks
And I die deep inside
You don't know
Because you don't care
You don't give a damn
About me

I see you with others
You are very careful
And your friendship
Is rather sustainable
But why is it
That your treatment
Of me is not fair?
What have I done
Against you?

One moment, one time
You are happy and gay
Too many countless times
You would rather
Kill me in silence
I cannot take it
I cannot stand it
I don't deserve it
But I bid you the best

Simply forget-me-not.

Author: Miam Medrano

The Girl Who Led Me Astray

2008-12-29T16:34:00.000-08:00

It's been a long time since I last came to Hong Kong. About 30 years, if the truth be known. In those days there was no MTR, no plethora of kitschy souvenir shops at the Peak, no hoards of Filipinos at virtually every street corner.

Filipinos – now that's something I simply wasn't expecting in such vast quantities. And yet I suddenly felt all at home after spending the last ten years in the Gulf where there seem to be more Filipinos per square inch than any other nationality. And just as in the UAE and Saudi, all the Filipinos I have met here are the friendliest, most caring people I know. And top of the list – for me at least – has to be my guide and mentor for the past week, Miam Medrano.

"Meet me under the large screen at the airport," she commanded when I told her I was on my way over to HK. And being one who (nearly) always does what he is told, I (almost) sat under the giant screen – in practice, about three metres away – and paid the price when poor Miam walked round and round for half an hour looking for the only guy on the airport concourse wearing a brick-red jacket. But it seems that those three metres was her undoing, and I felt suitably chastised when finally we met up.

I was taken to a barbeque at Stanley where I was introduced to nine of her friends and was fed the most wonderful delicacies (and it's no use telling me that anything tastes wonderful after the muck they serve you on Cathay Pacific – this was really good, believe me!). Daisy amused us all with her wit and banter, while Anne rolled her hips and fluttered her eyelashes in a way that would put any sexy pole dancer to shame, and all the while the food kept on coming and coming.

Now, I wonder what the opposite of a homing pigeon is? Because that would be a perfect description for the lovely Miam. We get to an MTR station and you can guarantee that if we should be going out one exit, she would instinctively lead me to one on totally the opposite side of the building; until, that is, I learned the rules of the game after which if she pointed in one direction, I would lead her the opposite way and all would be OK. Yet, thinking of it, I shouldn't be surprised, given the confusing signs there are all over HK. "Stand on the right, hold the handrail, walk on the left” reads one confusing sign at Central MTR. Well how, I ask myself? Or "In case of fire do not use the lift" I am told at my hotel (but as my room is on the 16th floor I decided to take the risk and use the lift anyway). "Beware trucks" I am admonished in a pedestrian only zone at Tsim Sha Tsui (falling from above, perhaps?).

Miam took me to see the Giant Buddha at Ngong Ping on Lantau. Just as well I had skipped breakfast as the entrance fee includes lunch (whether you want it or not). We sat down at a table and a huge tureen of soup was brought over to us. We were just starting on our second bowl when the rest arrived – a pot of rice and plate-loads of vegetables of every description – literally enough for five people. How Miam must have wished she had brought plastic containers with her!

She took me to see the Symphony of Lights – not once, but twice – the first time from the Avenue of Stars and the second night from Wan Chai, from where you can see the show on both sides of the harbour. We went to see not one museum, but four on the same day – a Wednesday – and discovered that museums are free to get into on Wednesdays.

We went to the beautiful Nan Lian Garden (no, Miam, let's try going in through the entrance!) and the not-so-beautiful Peak from where we were able to peer down through the mist to the harbour below. And everywhere we went there would be Filipinas that would drift in and out of conversation with us as we passed on our merry way. Yes, HK is a beautiful city, full of surprises, and full of lovely people. And a word to the wise: if you want a cheap date, ask your beloved if they would like to see the Giant Buddha anytime around lunchtime, and follow that with a tour of the museums – just so long as it is a Wednesday.

Oh yes, and if you accept an invitation from Miam to act as your guide, just remember to take along your GPS with you.

Author: Brian Salter

Casualties Of War

2008-12-14T23:08:00.000-08:00

Reading the story of Angela (Cover Story, skillfully narrated by Amy Gunnacao) reminded me of many distant tales of people I know. One is about my wife’s nephew who is a good and hard-working young man. He worked for 3 years in Saudi Arabia in his teens and after his vacation, for some reason, he could not come back. For several years he couldn’t find the luck to land for another overseas job. And so finally, when the chance came for an opening in Israel 5 years ago, he grabbed it. Before his departure, he brought his young family together with his wife, who is a teacher, to our house for a visit. I asked him why, of all places abroad, he chose to work in Israel – a country always at war. Without any hesitation his reply was short and straightforward, “Uncle, mas mahirap ang giyera sa sikmura dito – gutom!”

I was baffled by his determination to leave knowing that he is fully aware of the dangers that lie ahead in his place of destination and also of the tragic fate that befell his older brother in a not-so-recent past. The brother I am referring to worked in South Korea for 5 straight years without a single chance to go home for a vacation – the reason is because he was an undocumented worker. When he finally came home, in a matter of just few months, he got terribly sick. And so after a long battle with illness that saw his savings all wiped out he succumbed and died of cancer, obviously contracted from the harmful chemicals of the garment factory where he worked without proper protective and safety gears in a remote town in South Korea. He left behind a son and a grieving young wife who endured 5 years dreaming for his return.

I am sure that you have heard similar stories even before you started your own journey. Yet, these sad tales do not deter our spirit from seeking our destiny from all the four corners of the world – all in the name of our dream for a better life for our family and for ourselves. Our country is at war and fighting a formidable enemy – poverty! And most of us might not know it yet, but as OFWs, we are our country’s Salvation Army. This “war” has no geographical boundaries. It has no visible weapon of destruction, no deafening explosions yet its damage can be heard through the cries of our love ones left behind. This fight is for them and for the sake of our country. The irony though is that while many of our brothers-and-sisters-in-arms, especially those who are ill-equipped to face danger, are dying in the battlefield of survival our “generals” back home are basking with all the luxuries in life. And so stories such as those I mentioned above abound and will always be heard. What hurts me though is the fact that the numbers of these incidents will continuously grow as life gets harder each day in our country, but what pains me more is to know that our “generals” believe that the sad fate of Angela, the dangers faced by my wife’s nephew in Israel, the exploitation of the many undocumented OFWs, and the many more untold tragedies that I’m sure many of you are aware of, are just to them – Casualties Of War. That is probably the reason why they labeled the OFWs “Bagong Bayani“… for us to bleed in the battlefield while they hide in the comforts of their war rooms!

Author: Tony Bartolome, Editor, True Friends Newsmag

*Published in True Friends Newsmag (November 2008 issue)

A First

2008-12-14T23:04:00.000-08:00

There’s nothing like acknowledging a first time and savor its uniqueness. Most often than not, I take for granted a thing or a word that I have seen or heard for the first time. A ‘new experience’, in all the sense of that word, needs to be savored and cherished since it would no longer be a ‘first’ the next time you encounter that experience. It would be a completely new story.

Another shebang.

Another ballpark.

And in circumstances that you’ll keep on encountering that experience, it became ordinary and just a part of the background.

Ignored.

Neglected.

But when it’s suddenly gone, you’ll begin to wonder why. You’ll be literally taken aback of what’s amiss.

Author: Maia Noval

*Published in True Friends Newsmag (November 2008 issue)

Engkwentro

2008-12-14T23:00:00.000-08:00

Nanginginig sa takot. Butil-butil na pawis ang tumatagaktak mula sa noo, nanlalamig sa nerbiyos at nauutal. Anong nakikita ko? Sa may bukana ng pintuan, isang matandang babaeng nakaitim ng sumbrero at my hawak na nangingintab na parang palakol. Nakayuko sya’t hindi ko maaninag ang itsura. “Si… sino ka?”, pilit kong hinagilap ang aking boses. Unti-unting tumingala at tumingin sa dako ng aking kinaroroonan. Nakita ko ang kulubot niyang pisngi.

Ang kulay suka niyang balat at ang inaagnas niyang mukha. Ngumiti siya sa akin. Ngiti ng kamatayan. Lalo akong kinalibutan. Nanindig ang aking balahibo. Pinilit kong tumakas. Kumaripas ako ng takbo hanggang sa hindi na niya ako maabutan. Ngunit mabilis niyang hinaklot ang aking braso. Sobrang higpit na kahit anong gawin kong pagprotesta ay hindi pa rin ako makawala. Pinilit kong sumigaw upang humingi ng saklolo pero walang lumabas na boses sa aking bibig. Inipon ko ang aking lakas, tinibayan ang aking dibdib at buong pwersa kong isinigaw, “Pakawalan mo ako!” Subalit mistulang walang nakakarinig. Walang sasaklolo. Alam kong katapusan ko na.

Kasabay ng pagpatak ng aking luha, ipinikit ko nalang ang aking mata. Mabilis akong nagbalik tanaw sa nakaraan. Inalala ang mga mahal sa buhay, mga taong naging bahagi ng aking pighati at ligaya. At kung bibigyan man ako ng pagkakataon ni kamatayan na gumawa ng 3 kahilingan bago ako tulayang maging isang kasaysayan na lamang, hihilingin kong…
1. Bigyan ako ng isang araw na makasama ang aking pamilya.
2. Makita at makausap ang sinumang nasaktan ko o nakapanakit sa akin.
3. Ikasal ako sa dambana.

At sa puntong ito inihanda ko na ang aking sarili mula sa sugo ni kamatayan. Tanggap ko na ang aking katapusan… Hanggang sa maramdaman kong my malamig na kamay sa aking balikat. Niyuyugyog ako… “Hey,wake up! You’re having a bad dream! It’s time for work and yet you’re sleeping. Better stand up and start working before I terminate you!” Habol ang hininga, iminulat ko ang aking mata. Whoa! Anong nakikita ko? Hindi ko maipinta ang mukha at nanlilisik ang matang nakatunghay sa akin.Ayyy… ang amo ko pala! Lagot, parusa na naman ‘to! Pero salamat, Diyos ko, at buhay pa pala ako. Happy halloween!

Author: Amy Gunnacao

*Published in True Friends Newsmag (November 2008 issue)

The Departed

2008-12-14T22:58:00.000-08:00

The loving support of family and friends helped but the ache of loss could not be assuaged. In a birthday party 5 weeks after the burial of one that has been called to heaven, Kongkong (grandpa), my lady boss’ father is still sorrowing over the death of a brother, his best friend for 72 years.

While writers and philosophers have given their best to provide weighty arguments in favor of life after death, they have not succeeded in bringing comfort to the aching, anxious, questioning hearts. What does grieving mean to OFW families whose love ones have died? Just recently a town-mate flew home to arrange the funeral of her husband who died in a painful road accident. A few months ago, an 8 years old child was reunited with her mother after 5 long years of separation only not in a garden of joy but in an ocean of grief…the OFW mom committed suicide. And this year also, a friend working in Singapore lost the last member of her immediate family, her father, leaving her an orphan.

Every 2 long-agonizing years most OFWs take vacation anticipating a happy family reunion. However, deep frustrations and despair arise when the time comes that the people we look forward to be with are no longer available… gone to rest or somewhere not within our reach. The pain of missing or of grieving loved ones isn’t in their absence but it’s when we think of the best times we shared with them.

28 years ago when both of my grandparents died, I thought all the rest of my world were buried dead with them. But I discovered that their presence never departed me. In my long journey, their love enfolds me as though they stand beside me. With time, their thoughts served as steps, my inspiration, my redeemer when days are dull, difficult, or seemingly dying. Along with them there are beautiful souls whose presence had gone but remain forever as part of my existence. They were the people who gave me greater worth and purpose of living – a life of discovery, of teachings and treasures. Ms. Linda Layosa, a wonderful writer, mentor, and friend, my first believer of the gift of writing, who said: “When you have passion, your pen will be restless ’til inkless, by then still you are not thoughtless”. Elvie Oriente, a soul connection, a sisterhood bond that mutually gave us strength and devotion to family responsibility. Unconditional friendship and more from Suzette Cangayda, a brave cancer patient, blackbelt martial artist who influenced me and others the enthusiasm in sports, making our spirits soar like olympic champions, as twice basketball and volleyball team winners. Bro. Jhun Tindaan, Sis.flor Cristal,Sis. Meling Labo, Sis.Mareng Mea, lovable people who shared to me not just the gift of faith likewise - generosity, humility and servanthood.

Late afternoon one weekend, I was sitting by the window of the First Ferry churning its way from Hong Kong Pier across the Victoria Harbour to Discovery Bay. As towering buildings in Central receded in sight, I pondered that everything in the world around us is subject to decline. Plants wither and die, concrete century-old buildings are gradually being eaten away by the gnawing tooth of time. Daily, our bodies grow old and lose youth and vitality. Everything changes, nothing is permanent, just as time shifts from sunrise to sunset, and we from birth to death.

If things don’t last and life is full of uncertainties, what is left for us? November commemorates All Souls and All Saints Day. We honor our departed families and friends by offering gifts, graveyard visitation or prayers. Within the bounds of our acquaintances, we remember individuals with thankfulness while we think negatively of others whose lives were spent in selfish pursuits. While our minds are flooded with recollection of them, we realize that time will come and each of us will also pass away – be a memory. What would others recall when they think of us? Are we happy and productive? Or physically healthy but spiritually dead?

In between sacrifice and waiting comes the biggest challenge that we OFWs face — time. But we can make this opportunity of time to right our wrong, to honor our family commitments, to dream as if there are no limits, to explore in spite of discouragements, to achieve even when we face many obstacles.

Dr. King said: To die is gain if we live and leave a trail of greatness”. Death is like a thief of the night, we never know when our time is up until it’s over. With good spirit, we can use the moment to live, share, ponder, enjoy God’s Blessings for every 60 seconds we spend is a minute of life gone we can never get back.

Early dawn today, I am mesmerized by an alarming message. It reads, “When I die, I wish marami ang makikipaglibing sa akin…” My thoughts gone wild as the words sink to me wondering if he’s sober, sleepless or undergoing difficult situation contemplating into something uncheerful — like suicide. Knowing him as a kind teacher, a fair businessman, an honest-charitable public servant, a person of great virtues, funeral attendance is out of the question. Unsure what to say I replied ”Make sure you die dignified, otherwise baka pati ako hindi makikipaglibing kung sakaling buhay pa ako…” He texted back, “Additional challenge? Life isn’t fun without them. So far I’m enjoying the tides and season. Happy All Souls Day Sis!”

Wow! Sounds glorious on November 1st, and oh ya!!! It’s his big day too, so it was a weird birthday wish after all. Well, I sent wishes and prayers before good thoughts, and time passes by. Can’t go back to sleep, so I lit candles for my beloved departed, reminiscing the old times, wondering how they are out there in heaven!

Author: Annabelle Libao

*Published in True Friends Newsmag (November 2008 issue)

Nakaw Na Pag-ibig

2008-12-14T22:55:00.001-08:00

Mga kababayan nandito na naman tayo. Sama-sama nating harapin ang mga problemang dumarating sa atin lalo na sa ating mga mahal sa buhay. At ating pag-usapan ang karamihan ng mga nangyayari sa atin na kadalasan, kung hindi pera ay ang ating mga asawa.

Marami diyan na nananabik sa yakap ni Misis o ni Mister. Kaya ang iba sa ating mga kababayan naghahanap ng substitute para maibsan ang kalungkutan at upang mapunan ang panganga-ilangan ng katawan. Mayroon namang iba diyan na katabi na nga ang kanilang asawa pero hindi pa rin makuntento at ang hanap pa ay ibang papa na magbibigay sa kanya ng pangangailangan lalo na sa pera.

Yung mga iba diyan na ganito ang gawain ‘di ba kayo nakukonsensiya lalo na kung pareho kayong may mga anak. Oo nga at wala dito ang asawa mo at dito mo lang siya kasintahan ngunit ‘di mo ba naaalala ang asawa mo tuwing ibang lalaki o babae ang katabi mo? Alalahanin mo na lang ang mga anak mo na nagmamahal sa iyo. They know that you’re working here for them. Umaasa silang hindi mo ipagpapalit ang tungkulin mo bilang isang ina, sa kanilang pamilya mo. How could you tell them one day na may iba ka nang pamilya; masakit iyan para sa mga bata. Ang mga bata ang unang-unang naapektuhan ng gulo na pinasok mo. Dapat sana bago mo ipinagpalit ang asawa mo ay pinag-isipan mo munang mabuti kung makakabuti ba o hindi ang gagawin mo. Pero kung tawag lang ng laman at kamunduhan iyan kaya ka nakikabit o dahil wala kang katabi, aba, piliin mo naman ang taong kakasamahin mo! Hindi iyong may masisira kang pamilya. Mas lalo na nga kung ikaw ay may asawa na at anak tapos ganon din iyong sasamahan mo eh mahiya ka naman sa sarili mo. ‘Di lang pamilya mo ang sinira mo kundi pati pamilya ng kinakasama mo. Pag ikaw pinagsabihan na kabit di ba nakakahiya or sabihin na kaya mo siya kinasama dahil siya ay may pera o wala kang masandalan. May mukha ka pa kaya na ihaharap sa mga anak mo, o kung dalaga ka mahiya ka naman sa magulang mo. Hindi tayo laging tama sa inaakala. Dahil kung minsan masyado tayo mapangarap o ambisyosa at padalos-dalos sa ginagawa. Hindi na tayo nag-iisip kung ito ba ay tama o mali. Patawarin ka man ng asawa mo sa ginawa mo, may mantsa na rin ang inyong pagsasama. At doon na mawawala ang respeto sa isa’t isa. Baka gayahin ka pa ng anak mo pagdating ng araw, dahil kung ano nakikita ng mga bata sa mga magulang iyon ang ginagaya nila; parents are the first teacher of their kids kaya dapat tayo ang magsilbing magandang simbolo sa kanila, sa halip na maging bad influence sa kanila.

Iyong iba naman diyan na sila pa nga ang kabit, aba, sila pa ang may ganang magtaray at sila pa ang may lakas ng loob na tumawag sa original na asawa at hindi lang iyon, sa madaling araw pa tatawag para awayin iyong original tapos sasabihin ‘di ka na mahal ng iyong asawa, ako na, kasi mas magaling ako sa iyo. Mahiya ka naman sa balat mo you’re not the original spouse so you don’t have the right to act like the original one. Kung baga nakikitikim ka lang o nanghihiram lang kaya dapat manahimik ka. Makosensiya ka naman. We are here to work and not to seduce the partner of others. Ang asawa ng may asawa ay dapat sa kanya lang, not unless they are legally separated or widow.

There’s only one happiness in life. That is, to love and to be loved. And not to share with the partner of your neighbor. As written in the bible –- “Thou shall not covet thy neighbor’s wife.”

Author: Ed Roquel, True Friends Newsmag

*Published in True Friends Newsmag (November 2008 issue)

The Angela In Our Lives

2008-12-14T22:36:00.000-08:00

What’s with the pinoy label of the mother being “ilaw ng tahanan” and the father being “haligi ng tahanan”? In the absence of either one, it’s hard to keep a balance in the home. In the absence of both, much harder still… or no balance at all. There may be caregivers for our kids left back home (lolo and lola, tito and tita) to take over our responsibilities in our absence but they can never take our place as parents. Substitute, yes. The substitute ilaw ng tahanan may not radiate light as bright as the real mom, like candle in place of a light bulb. The substitute haligi ng tahanan may not be as sturdy as the real dad, like a substitute wooden post for bricks. Never the same. There’s always a void, a vacuum waiting to be filled up in the longing child… hungry for paternal care, aching for maternal care. The child’s emotional imbalance remains undetected… until it’s too late.

Amy Gunnacao’s “In Memory of Angela” in our cover story on TF Newsmag for November nudges us to re-examine our choices and redefine our goals. “To provide a better future for our family” — isn’t that every overseas Filipino workers’ (OFWs) purpose in braving foreign lands? A better future in terms of what? A better education for an OFW child than that of the undergraduate OFW parent. A better and comfortable lifestyle for an OFW child compared with that of the OFW mom/dad who grew up lacking in the basic necessities of life. A better job for the OFW child than that of the OFW who scrubs toilet bowls and foreign butts, who chauffeurs night owl bosses, who operates dangerous machineries and toils on backbreaking jobs. A better future for the Angela in our lives. We stuff Angela’s pocket with cash and gadgets. What about the deposits of faith we’re supposed to place in her heart? Do we reach out far enough to make her feel she’s deeply loved despite our physical absence and geographical gap? Are we certain we’re not drilling large holes in our child’s heart?

OFW parents tend to overcompensate and spoil the child with material things. We fail to realize that other things may be more important — like showing a genuine interest in what concerns our kid and giving our focused, undivided attention. And that is possible through the wires, through letters, and other various ways of getting in touch. Not all OFW children live in comfort the way Angela was provided for by her OFW parents. Financial needs are still not being met in many OFW families and the child has to deal with this as he has to with the emotional needs of being separated from the OFW parent. The psychological impact on an OFW child leaves the deepest mark… It either builds or breaks a character. How we deal with our child now would greatly influence her future. The “better future” we’re so keen on preparing for the family may not come if our parenting system is flawed. We’d wonder if something is wrong with our ways when we see signs of rebellion or when our child’s being withdrawn. We don’t ignore the signs and dismiss it as growing pains. We try our darnedest to communicate – really communicate – and delve deep into the kid’s issues. We connect.

While a light overhead can illuminate every nook and cranny of the room, a candle’s blaze only brightens a corner of it, leaving sore, dark spots. We need not dump the bulk of the responsibility of raising our child in the hands of the caregivers back home. Showing that we’re very involved and so much a part of his/her everyday life will do a great deal of good, a better future is at hand.

Author: Joy Marqueses

In Memory Of Angela

2008-12-14T20:50:00.000-08:00

Her name is Angela. A happy and energetic girl at six. People call her “Angel” because of her solemn face with rosy cheeks that make her seem a heaven-sent. She’s the ideal baby of every couple; an obedient child. She goes running to Lola after her class at the preparatory school to hear her favorite fairy tales. Her parents left her with her Lola when they work abroad, in preparation for her future.

Years went by, the little cute darling turned into a gorgeous, conservative lady. She had so many admirers. With the financial support from her parents, she goes to college at a private school in the city, kilometers away from her Lola. She rents an apartment to minimize her commuting. Lack of money was never a problem. Her friends tell her she’s very fortunate for having parents like hers. They can give all she wanted. Yes it is true, she can have all her wishes but there’s something she can’t achieve despite the luxury. She misses something. And this is what she hides from her friends. They never knew, she wasn’t really that fortunate. She rarely saw her parents. The last time with them was when she was still in high school. They weren’t present in her graduation from primary and secondary school, wherein she received high honors. She wasn’t given importance. This is Angela’s thought whenever she’s alone. She really longs for her parents’ care and love. It’s good that she has her loving Lola, who took her parents’ place, acted as her mother and father since childhood. No doubt she love her Lola so much. And even in the smallest difficulty she has, her Lola is always there to guide and tell her what to do.

One day, her friends were so worried with the many absences she incurred. Three days stretched to more than a week away from class. They paid her a visit at her Lola’s place but didn’t find Angela there. According to her Lola, she left on Sunday but failed to come back home for the week-end to get her allowance. Lola was terribly worried. Soon, they decided to look for Angela.

They searched the places that she possibly could have gone to but they found no Angela. Afternoon, Lola’s losing heart. But there’s one more thing she’s afraid of — Angela’s parents. What will they do upon knowing that Angela is missing? Ah! she doesn’t really know what to do anymore. After sometime, a knock on the door startled her. Instantly, she thought it was Angela. She rushed to the door and opened it immediately. Her excitement turned into disappointment after seeing the postman, who handed her a letter. It was from Angela’s parents. She opened it quickly. The old woman grew more tense. This is what she’s been afraid of. Angela’s parents are coming home for a vacation. She cried out Angela’s name. She looked up and uttered a prayer. Yes, she can’t do anything more but pray. Lola looked pitiful, seated at the window, hoping that Angela would come home.

As she was expecting, Angela emerged from the door. She was taken by surprise. She doesn’t know what to say, whom to thank but she found herself hugging her granddaughter. Angela cried. “Apo…” Lola began, “what is it? What happened? Why?” This time, Angela cried more deafeningly. Her Lola caress her back trying to calm her. After sometime, Angela stopped crying. Her Lola gave her a glass of water to calm her. Lola looked at Angela. She noticed that Angela’s face is etched with pain. She’s so pale, her face a picture of no hope, her shoulders down and seems to be out her mind. Her Lola asked Angela again. And finally, Angela began to relate what happened, “L-Lola, they tried to… to kill me… but I promised them not to report to the authorities… so, they set me free… and alive.” Her Lola’s confused with Angela’s story. She asked more questions and Angela made it clearer. The old woman wanted to report to the police what happened but Angela doesn’t want to bring the incident out. She just wanted a silent and peaceful living. Soon, they decided to keep it untold.

It is really good that she has her Lola who comforts her every time she has problems. She’s grateful to the Lord for having her. Every time she remembers the tragic encounter, her LolaApo, you’re thinking about it again… don’t let this be your hindrance in achieving any goal you have, leave it that way. Don’t be stuck with the past, I love you and you will never be alone as I am here.” This is the most inspiring thought of her Lola she’ll never forget. would tell her, “

One morning, she heard murmurs from the sala that woke her up. Lola called her then, “Angela, come… your Mama and Papa have just arrived.” There was excitement in Lola’s voice and so in Angela. This is the best news she ever heard. After hearing that, she jumped from bed and run downstairs. She was so eager to see her parents once more. And she found herself hugging her parents. There were tears — tears of joy, seeing her parents once more. They fill every corner of their home with joy and laughter, which wasn’t so years ago. And once more, smile in Angela’s face is evident, a picture of happiness — longed for, for so long.

Weeks passed. Angela’s parents’ vacation is almost over. They’re so worried of telling this to their daughter because they know she’d cry again. As they’re having breakfast one morning, they have decided to inform Angela about the trip. And as usual, since they arrived, Angela got to the table with a smile on her face for she’s really happy to have them again. But as they began to speak, Angela threw up. She hurriedly went to the kitchen. They were left puzzled and worried about her. Lola grew worried, because she made a conclusion, and so sure that Angela’s having morning sickness — the result of the bad incident. They heard a noise from the kitchen. They found her body lying on the floor. They immediately brought her to the hospital. After some diagnosis the doctor inform them that Angela’s pregnant. They were shocked except for Lola. And they went rushing to her room. They found Angela sitting on bed, hopelessly staring outside the window where she witness a scene of a happy family — a couple with their cute little girl. This is what Angela long most during her childhood that she didn’t experience.

A slap on her face brought her back to the present, she was shocked. She saw her mother looking at her, like a beast ready to eat its prey. She was so confused, she didn’t know what the matter was. “Ma-a.., what is it?”, she asked innocently. “You’re 1 month pregnant according to the doctor,” her father started. “How could this be? Do you already have your boyfriend and had sex with him? Is that what you learned?” She can’t find a word to utter. Yet her tears started to flow. Once again her mother asked her but this time it is more terrifying. “What happened, Angela?!” With this, is another slap on her face. Angela can’t find a word to say. She doesn’t know how to start because of the scene she’d never expected to happen. This time, the mother had convinced her daughter to speak. “Ma,” Angela started but there’s still fear in her. “I am a victim of rape, kept for days by men who used me,” she tearfully said. Her parents were shocked, “I… I tried to escape but I failed. It’s good I was able to convince them to set me free, alive. At first I wanted to be dead, yet I think of all of you whom I shall be leaving, I just wanted to see you once more and be with you.” After hearing her, her Mama and Papa look at each other. Angela’s right. “Yes, I always wanted to be at your side since you left me with Lola,” Angela continued, “I envy the other children before, for they enjoy their childhood life with their mothers and fathers beside them. They love them so much. But me? I long for what they have. It’s good I have Lola who’s always with me and took care of me until now. She’s the only person whom I poured my sentiments with, in all those times..and now you’re leaving me again? Go on! Make your life the best with all you have. I can manage… I did it for years. I can do it… with Lola.” The couple were speechless, knowing Angela’s right. On their way home, his father’s still eager to know who did this to her. “Angela, who did this to you, do you know them?”, her father asked her. “As I have said, it is no more important. What is important now is my baby whom I shall be giving birth and take good care of. I will never make the same mistakes you did… I will love my baby with the best way I can.” Her father was quite hurt of what he heard from Angela. It’s true. They let her live her life alone without them.

Years passed, Angela’s baby’s now a cute little darling like her when she’s just a li’l kid. She’s happy playing with the other children near them, while her Lolo and Lola are so happy watching her. “If only Angela’s here, she’d know the feeling of being a mother of an angel, like Angeline.” It’s Angeline’s Lolo, “Uh! Sure, with this kind of baby she would probably enjoy her life as a parent… if only she didn’t die…” Angeline’s Lola started to cry again after remembering Angela, who died after giving birth with Angeline. “Stop crying. That’s God’s will, we will all end there. What we shall do now is to give Angeline, our apo, the best we can do and never leave her as what we’ve done with Angela,” Lolo ended.

Author: Amy Gunnacao

*Published in True Friends Newsmag (October 2008 issue)

Ikaw Ang Aking Buhay

2008-12-14T20:47:00.000-08:00

Nang maramdaman ko ang iyong pagpintig,
Napuno ng sigla ang aking daigdig
Ipinangako sa sarili na sa iyo iaalay,
Lahat ng makakaya, kahit ang aking buhay.

Habang ikaw nga ay nasa aking sinapupunan,
Bawat paggalaw mo’y sadyang hinihintay
Kaligayahan ang hatid sa puso’t isipan
Ang ngiti sa labi ko ay hindi napaparam

Ang iyong pagsilang ay pinananabikan
Hindi ko mahintay na ikaw ay mahawakan
At nang makita ka wala akong masambit
Isa kang munting anghel na kaloob ng langit

Dumaloy sa mata ko luha ng kaligayahan
Habang yakap kita sa aking kandungan
Ika’y ligaya ko at inspirasyon sa buhay
Tanging ang maghihiwalay sa atin ay ang kamatayan

Binantayan ko ang iyong paglaki
Wala akong hinangad, kundi iyong ikabubuti
Lahat ng hirap ko at mga pighati
Ay naiibsang lahat, kapag ikaw ay ngumiti

Iniwan nga kita noong ika’y musmos pa
Walang katiyakan kung muling magkikita
Ngunit sa puso ko’y laging andito ka
Hindi ka nawala sa aking alaala

Anak ikaw ang buhay ko at wala ng iba
Lagi kong dalangin na muli kang makasama
Muling maramdaman yakap mo sa twina,
Ang makapiling ka, tunay na ligaya.

Author: Zyrel

*Published in True Friends Newsmag (October 2008 issue)

Taiwan... Mei Yo Nama Wan

2008-12-14T20:28:00.000-08:00

The last couple of months I lived in Taipei in 1999 was spent on night joy-rides during week-ends. Xiao Shuang and Chiu Lien would sneak me out of the building whenever they come on Friday nights just to spend time with and cheer me up. They live and work in Taichung City, a four-hour drive from Taipei. Xiao Shuang drives a black Nissan Verita, which Shirley — my broker’s fiancee said was too small a car for Shuang’s big size. That little car took us to high places in the mountains where the three of us would sit on its hood for hours just admiring and taking in the breathtaking view of the city at night. When we weren’t high on nature’s beauty, we were caffeine-high from the cuploads of Mc Donald’s brewed coffee we consume in the streets of Taipei. The McDo store near Mitsukoshi (Top View’s awesome!) was one of our hang-outs.

We once parked the car in the middle of a long bridge after midnight and snoozed, only driving off at dawn. We would roam the streets; eat ‘tempura’ (starch-coated meat, fish, vegetables); feast on too sweet ‘ti gua’ (sweet potato) and noodles with eels (hmmm!); and buy knick knacks in the night markets. Lung Shan Shi Temple (a famous ‘miao‘ in Taiwan) was just three blocks from where I lived, its brightness clearly viewed from my window at night. There was a night market nearby. That street’s always too busy, crowded, and noisy. It’s real fun though, so much alive, in deep contrast to Ilan City in the high mountains where I first had a job before coming to Taichung and then finally Taipei.

I worked for six households during those times I was ‘working’ for the agency. I was risking my neck, going along with my broker’s orders. I ran the risk of being deported when found out…but I prayed for it to happen then when my hands were bleeding from dishwashing, when my teeth were chattering from having my feet soaked too long while doing the laundry by hand, when I was hosing up a four-storey school building in winter. I was a modern day slave in Taiwan.

I wasn’t alone. I heard the same suffering voices on the phone when I was on-duty at the agency. I did paperwork, set up meetings for my broker and prospective partners for agency tie-ups in the Philippines — making overseas calls to all the agencies listed in the Council of Labour and Affairs (CLA); and receiving calls from workers placed by the agency who was having trouble at work. That was when I got to hear the others’ stories. There were times I get to see these workers in their worksite when one of the Taiwanese agents brought me so the worker would easily open up to me, being her own kind. Communication between employee and employer or between employee and agent was always the greatest problem encountered. I was there to ease things a little.

Everything changed when my broker kicked me out of Taichung City and sent me to his fiancee’s sister’s family in Taipei. That was after we had a shouting match after he refused to let me terminate the contract and go back home. He wanted me to stay and work for him permanently just like all the other employers I previously worked for who offered to make all things legal if I choose to stay. He sent me to Taipei to think things over after the big fight and after telling me he never will forget the only Filipino who ever dared to shout back at him.

Oh sweet! Things were a lot lighter and easier in Taipei. When he tried to pull me out more than a couple of months later, I asked to have the earliest possible flight back home. He finally relented and I bid my Taiwanese friends goodbye.

Author: Joy Marqueses, TF Newsmag

*Published in True Friends Newsmag (October 2008 issue)

note: above is a re-post from joyzjourney

Are You Raising A Good Kid?

2008-12-14T20:23:00.000-08:00

As our country celebrates October as the National Children’s Month, I can’t help but wonder what future our country holds for our children. The organizers of this annual observance has in mind the noble intention of raising awareness on the welfare of our country’s youth – which has steadily and alarmingly becoming more delinquent according to some NGO’s such as the Catholic Bishops Conference of the Philippines.

This is a serious matter especially sa ating mga OFWs because one key reason they cited as the cause of this problem is due to the large number of OFW-parents being away from their children — thus weakening the values of our youth. Dito sa Hong Kong, pamilyar na sa ating mga manggagawa ang makarinig ng mga masasaklap na k’wento gaya ng ‘di pagtatapos ng pinapag-aral na anak, teen-pregnancies, pagkalulong sa drugs at mga anak na ‘di makuhang magpahalaga sa hirap ng magulang na OFW. Another ominous problem that I see is, sa sobrang subsob natin sa pagkayod para sa kanilang ikabubuhay, we forget to ask ourselves: How big is this social problem? Saan kaya ito hahantong? For now, I don’t think we have immediate and specific answers except to be on guard — each family on its own!

I have few unsolicited tips that may somehow be useful to worried parents out there. I have lived similar uncertainties in the past but was rather fortunate to be able to sustain my eldest to become a practicing medical doctor today and so with my youngest who is graduating in college this year. Allow me to share some of my secrets in sustaining the enthusiasm in their pursuit for premium education.

When my eldest was in her elementary years, I brainwashed her that she would become a doctor when she grew up. I have no stable job at that time but my commitment to that brainwashing turned out to be as strong as hers which means I have to work extra harder para hindi ako mapahiya sa aking anak. Kaya, my advice to our parent-readers is to start early sa pagpa-plano ng career ng kanilang anak because it will not only make them more determined, but this commitment will also give you that extra strength to work harder.

Continuously improve your skills so that your kids will not belittle you when they get more education and become smarter. ‘Pag tawag mo, ‘di ka makakantiyawan ‘pag tungkol sa new gadgets ang nababanggit nila tulad ng mga types of computer games na “in” or mga “hot” topics nila. One way is to upgrade or educate yourself sa computer technology, because you can find almost everything they are crazy about in the internet. That way, you can still give them some sort of advice as to what is best for them, knowing what kind of games and stuff they are up to. This process will not only prepare your children towards a brighter future but will also equip you with the competitive skills when you finally rejoin your family. We should maintain a mas-informed, mas-smart image to our children to keep winning their respect.

Maintain constant but quality communication with your family. Tawag ka nga ng tawag puro away at sermon naman! When I say quality communication, I mean you must feel that your mind and your kids’ mind are one and online on the things I mentioned above. Talk BIG things and they will aspire for greatness.

Of course there are many more but lastly and most importantly, pray a lot! There are thousands of unforeseen events that could derail our dreams for our kids. Our country as a whole is now faced with a disintegrating moral values on a daily basis. Morally offensive materials abound in our local movies, TV shows, newsprints and the Board of Censors seems to be helpless or useless. Our noon-time shows are filled with indecent and sexually-charged contents, and most celebrities are not of help by leading lives that are not conducive to our traditional values, the same could be said to many of our local and national leaders. Consider Malacanang’s recent appointment of Gov. Chavit Singson as Deputy for National Security Adviser. It is common knowledge that Gov. Singson’s political history in Ilocos Sur is marred with violence as he vied for political supremacy against his cousins. His national prominence came about from his role in ousting the then Pres. Joseph Estrada. All peace-loving Filipinos know that his “role” is not borne out of patriotism but rather to protect his own life. And now, the government “rewarded” the Governor from Ilocos Sur, whose history of violence is a common knowledge, to be an adviser for our country’s national security. Unbelievable!

And so to my fellow parent-OFWs, we are faced with a seemingly insurmountable task of not only ensuring that we can afford our children’s tuition fees but must carry on the extra burden of constantly reminding our kids that decency in government exist in other countries and many of our political celebrities should not be their “role-models”. Given these scenarios, the more reason we should be vigilant and resolved to guide our children and let us not surrender “our innocent sheep to the folds of the hungry wolves in our land”.

Author: Tony Bartolome, Editor, True Friends Newsmag

*Published in True Friends Newsmag (October 2008 issue)

Rumors And Gossips... Why It Hurts? How Does It Destroy Friendships?

2008-12-14T20:18:00.000-08:00

We face it, people gossip and we enjoy rumors that we are hearing especially when we are bored. Rumor and gossip are slightly different. A “rumor” is unclear information that we heard from unknown source but we have no proof whether that piece of story is true or false. A “gossip” is an idle talk, usually a “private and delicate thing” that people don’t talk openly about but revealed by someone and spread it out from one person to another behind the person’s back. That is gossip. Rumor on the other side is just an occasional story which might be true, partially true –- partially made up, or maybe totally made up but also passed on from one person to another. The receiver usually don’t care if the story is true or not and how it is delivered to another person.

Here, is one example of how rumor changes:
1) Maria: “Hoy Kulasa iyong manok namin nangitlog ng labindalawa, pero nakakapagtaka, kasi iyong anim na itlog parang itlog ng itik. Iniisip ko, baka napagawi ang isa sa alagang itik nang kapitbahay namin na nagkataong doon nangitlog mismo sa “nest” nong manok ko? Di kaya?
2) Kulasa: Hoy Petra alam mo ba yung manok ni Maria nangitlog ng itik, may duda daw siya sa itik nong kapitbayhay niya … sus, pwede palang mangyari yon?
3) Petra: Hoy, Pedro nabalitaan mo ba na iyong manok ni Maria at itik nong kapitbahay nila ay may relasyon pala? Ayun… nangitlog tuloy ng itik iyong manok ni Maria at nangitlog naman ng manok yung itik ng kapitbahay niya!

This may be an exaggerated example, but one piece of story can really change seriously if the listener heard it incorrectly and inadvertently delivered the story with slight changes. Even if these slight changes were made unintentionally, a new version of the story is born and the story becomes more exaggerated as people passed it on. Sometimes, the result….” the new version” maybe hurting to both you (as the victim), and the people close to you. When rumors already spread like virus, it becomes difficult to defend yourself. Some keep quiet, sat on it until rumor dies. For some, they reacted but as they do it, the more they got trapped. It’s like a nail that you hammered deeply into a wood, even if you pull it out again, the hole remains. So whatever you do, once you are the victim, you lose. It’s nice if you have friends around consoling you, but if nobody… just try to console yourself, ha ha ha. What else can you do? Ang mahalaga, you do not harm anybody and you have tried to be friendly with others. Pero sabi nga, you can’t please everybody. Hindi pwede talaga lahat ay matuwa sa iyo! Basta isipin mo na lang, for friends who really loves you, they don’t care about the rumor they heard. Rumour is another thing and the truth on your friendships is a separate matter. How to protect your friendship against rumor? SIMPLE – Be deft against rumor. Whether a rumor is true, false, partially true, decorated, or made up…. ignore it. Measure your closeness with your friends and think of the good old days. All people make mistakes but rumors worsen it. If your friend become a victim of this, ask yourself, do I care for my friend or I care for the carrier of this rumor? If you allow yourself to be influenced by this, you are extending a big favor to the rumor-maker. In short, protect your friend first by not making the “rumor-maker” happy!

Author: Rose Cruto Ho, TF Newsmag

*Published in True Friends Newsmag (October 2008 issue)

Panloloko

2008-12-14T20:09:00.000-08:00

Dito sa Hong Kong, karamihan sa atin ay dito nakikilala ang mga kaibigan. Dito na tayo nagkakaroon ng mga new friends, bestfriend or circle of friends. Nagtitiwala na tayo agad-agad sa mga taong nakilala natin. Kasi naman unang araw pa lang nagpapakita na sa atin ng kabaitan. Nililibre ka na niya agad ng lunch or dinner kasi kesyo wala ka pang sahod kasi baguhan ka pa lang. Ikaw naman na bago pa lang akala mo totoo siya sa ginagawa niya at maluwag sa kalooban niya na bigyan ka. Hindi mo alam na hinuhuli lang pala niya ang iyong loob, na oras na mag-tiwala ka sa kanya BINGO na siya sa iyo. Mag sisimula na yan magsasabi ng mga financial problems niya. Hindi masama ang tumulong pero dapat may limit tayo, kasi naman may kapwa tayo OFW diyan na sa tagal ng pamamasukan niya wala pa ring ipon, puro utang na lang. Pag hindi pa nag-kasya ang inuutang, aba pati mga bagong salta na kababayan bibiktimahin. Mag-mamakaawa na i-pangutang sila sa bangko kahit konti lang, sila daw ang bahala sa monthly fee pero huwag ka, hanggang umpisa lang yan, pag naka dalawang hulog na iyan mag-tatago na at hindi mo na mahahagilap. Pag tinakot mo naman sila pa ang nag-mamalaki. Sila na ang tinulungan sila pa ang may ganang magalit.

Sa mga kababayan natin na bagong dating lang. Hindi masama ang makipag-kaibigan pero dapat maging mautak ka rin hindi iyong ikaw ang uutakan. Kayo naman diyan na nang-raraket ng mga kapwa, makonsensya naman kayo. Pare-pareho tayo na naghihirap sa pag-tatrabaho; pare-pareho tayong dayuhan dito dapat tayo ‘yung nag-kakaisa, nag- tutulungan at nag-mamalasakitan sa isa’t-isa. Masaya ka ba sa ginagawa mo na panloloko sa kapwa mo? Nakakatulog ka pa ba sa masamang gawain mo? Nagka-pera ka nga pero galing naman sa masamang paraan. Kaibigan ito ang iyong tandaan, ang pera na hindi mo pinaghirapan wala iyang patutunguhan, hindi gaya ng pera na pinagsikapan mo, galing sa hirap at pawis mo malayo ang mararating mo kabayan.

Ang mga iba naman diyan na mautak din, nag-papautang pero grabe naman ang taas ng mga interest talo pa ang bangko dito.Tutulong ka nga ‘di mo pa lubusang tulungan ang ating kaibigan. Business nga lang naman walang masama pero hindi mo ba iniisip na sa halip na makatulong ka lalo mo pang pinabagsak ‘yung pinautang mo dahil sa taas mong magpatong. Nag-hihirap na nga ‘yung umuutang sa’yo, mas lalo mo pang pinahirapan. Ang kayamanan natin dito sa ibabaw ng mundo ay hindi natin ‘yan madadala sa kabilang buhay.

Whoever puts God first in his life will be the first in His kingdom but whoever puts God last in his life will be the last in God's kingdom. Thank you sa lahat ng mga readers na nag-send ng comments, sama-sama uli tayo next month sa November issue.

Author: Ed Roquel, True Friends Newsmag

*Published in True Friends Newsmag (October 2008 issue)

Connections

2008-12-14T19:57:00.000-08:00

"Blood is thicker than water", an old cliche na masyado ng gasgas, so to speak, but will always hold true among every family. A few days ago, I posted on public what to me can be considered a very private journal entry. It was written few years back for my father. For some reason, I just felt like posting it and so I did without giving it much thought. I bared my heart and soul in that piece and it did evoke different comments and views from friends and loved ones alike. All of them were taken in good spirit, he he!

My dad has been an OFW for as long as I can remember. When I was young and I think of him, all I can see is a plane taking off or the jewelries I will be receiving in a few more months. Everything was superficial back then. Suki na sya ng mga airlines bound to Saudi Arabia. That was the second country I remember I was able to write when I was in Kinder, after learning to write Philippines syempre. Then I grew up with my Lola and Lolo who think the world of me (spoiled brat? nah! I'm not).

Needless to say, being an OFW is never and I guess will never be an easy job, either for those who will be working overseas and to the families they will be leaving behind. Our local church pastor is even vocal in saying those jobs post a big threat on our family as a unit. You never see your children grow and so you end up not knowing them at all, some marital responsibility will be overlooked and so the risk on being cheated is on and will highly be there, the physical and emotional distance he said will test every part of the family and if you're not strong enough...you might lose it.

Is it worth it?" I once asked my dad. Then he would say, "May choice ba tayo?" and I'd fell silent. Oo nga naman, our country is rich with talented and brilliant people but it's the resources or the opportunity of a good job that we are lacking. As a result, some people pack their things and with eyes half-closed they go to a different land and seek a "greener pasture" like what my dad did. Not because he wanted to but more because he needed to. On our end naman, we tried to have our presence felt by him. Snail mail pa lang ang uso noon and of course a few calls every once in a while. Maybe that developed my love for writing, and the burning desire for PLDT to install a phone in our house had influenced me, too, in a way, so ngayon Call Center agent ako, ha! ha!

Physical distance from your family, especially your kids, can be a good faith-testing-exercise. Your strength and patience being developed whenever there's a bad news about the country lalo na pag sa pamilya, nakakaloka talaga! But like what dad once said, "We don't have much choice, daughter". Because there are people who rely and depend on us and we love them too much to let them down. So the new label for OFW "Bagong Bayani" fits them well. Hopefully, more than just the label, there will also be added benefits for the unsung heroes.

My dad was not an exclusion in those pain and so am I, being his child. His constantly being away and the diminishing communication with him made the love somehow withered and insecurity slowly crawled in. Communication, just like in any relationship, be it short, medium or long distance is very important like water to plants, oxygen to humans, fertilizer to soil. We just can't live without it. Buti nga ngayon there are so many ways to communicate. There's internet that allows you to even see the person on your screen, cellphones to call and 'text' to the point that our thumb gets stiff, and snail mail of course (I find it sweeter pa nga to receive one). There are so many medium now to communicate to somehow lessen the pain of missing one another.

Two days after posting that painful journal entry out of the chest I received a call from my stepmom, telling me my dad is in the hospital and in not so good of a condition. Without doubts and hesitation I went to see him. He look pleased in seeing me though he was in the ICU. He opened his eyes three times to look and smiled at me. I stayed with him everyday at the hospital and realized how fragile life is. I could have lost him without telling him I love him. Well, that will be water under the bridge now.

I wonder why did I post that online journal? Is it because I've been thinking about my dad lately and pains me to realize how did we end up to? Or is it because he's been thinking about me too or could it be because he was in the hospital at that time? And just what a coincidence, after posting it we finally have both the courage to face the ugly truth that we lost each other somewhere along the tracks? But that's okay, we learn from our mistakes. No matter how painful it is, it's still a lesson well learned.

"Relationships, not achievements or the acquisition of things, are what matters most in life". In my experience, I allowed too much pain and insecurity along with self pity to see beyond my father's motives in working abroad. It was hard for me but must be hell for him too! In my deepest understanding of what a family is, I came to realize that no matter what you've been through, where you've been at and how different you seem to be, connection will always be there in different forms and different meanings. For almost every bad fall or bad thing that happens to us, our family will always be the last to leave us. After all, as an old cliche says, "Blood is thicker than water".

Author: Crizel De Leon

*Published in True Friends Newsmag (September 2008 issue)

Legacy Of Hope

2008-12-13T15:40:00.000-08:00

”Choices people make and circumstances in life sometimes conspire to teach us lessons, direct our steps even in the most difficult ways.”

My story begins in 1970, the year I was born. My parents were married not out of romantic love but parental arrangement. To say that my childhood was not-so-happy is an understatement. Tragedies of misfortune abound. For one, four successive newborn siblings died with no found reasons. Second, I’m a girl — the first born. In their belief to cut a curse, I was given to my mother’s married barren brother. My stay with them, however, was short, his wife preferred a child from her family line for permanent adoption. So my paternal grandparents had me instead. I was six when a healthy, handsome baby brother came, the sole pride and joy of my parents.

I grew up in a small village of less than 200 people. Seasonal farming was the main source of income. Daily consumption includes gathering wild ferns, turnips, mushrooms in the woods; shells, fish and frogs from nearby creeks. Additional recreations were chasing chickens and hunting spiders. Most of the time, I felt, looked, acted, and smelt like a ranger. I was a loner, madalas umuuwing luhaan kapag nangangapit-bahay. There’s nobody I can play with. Kids just ignored me, teased me at lagi wala din kakampi. From home, school was a 59-minute walk through the rice fields, I wasn’t discouraged. My grandparents inspired me with hopes and dreams that someday I will enjoy a better life, ride a bus in the city instead of kariton, watch real life movie not just old folk tales from a transistor radio, and live one day in a house that could shade me from moonlight and raindrops. They taught me how to live with nature, enjoy abundance in simplicity but also to dream big. With them I was the happiest kid. They were my greatest source of love, comfort and encouragement but I lost them both when I was 10. Sabay ibinurol, sabay din inilibing (grandma died of a disease, grandpa of cardiac arrest, 2 days later). That was the saddest point of my life. Grieving tears flooded me with emotions, it dampened not only my face but my soul for many days, months and years after. I attended secondary at age 12, living independently at the school’s dormitory. Money was tight, it’s not even enough for daily necessities and projects. School breaks meant not rest but a time for me to help in the farm, pasture animals, do household chores or babysit my brother. With no comfort or luxury, I persevered. I poured out efforts capitalizing on my pains, hopes, and longings maintaining grades as an honor student, consistently. Every March, school’s annual recognition day was considered a reward-giving-new-things day for me as substitute of the usual-relatives-hands-me-down stuffs of Christmas.

I studied college but my parents can’t continue to support me so I stopped. Frustrated, bored and helpless, I went to Manila. With some luck, I was employed in a garment export company. Under 18 I’ve been working since then. As a young adult trying to find a place in the world, I have lots of questions in mind. Early memories of fear, rejection and despair reminded me of the missing pieces of life… fine things, home, and the love of family. I have been told more than once that I was born jinx (unlucky). Though I wanted to believe that they were wrong, I carried a secret fear that perhaps they were right. I continued sacrificing things of youth in order to be matured, self-sufficient, and responsible. I landed in Hong Kong in 1991. I brought with me a great dream and a great responsibility. Out of kindness and obedience I freely share my blessings to my family. With hope things will improve and my brother will not be deprived of privileges and experience the hardships I’ve been through, I was dismayed to find generosity and sacrifice have no value for him. He married young, twice, with degree unfinished.

I decided to go home in 2001. For 5 years I was blessed with a wonderful husband and 2 great kids. Blissful to my hope, my relationship with my parents improved. We talked, worked out things that matter most in life.They acknowledged my hardships and sacrifices as well as their mistakes and shortcomings. Slowly, I began to retake my rightful place as their daughter and gained more respect, trust and love that I so long deserved. Together for 40 years, I’m sure that between my parents, love is shared and still lives. Same time, I saw what my brother’s life has become. His days revolved in alcohol, violence and other irresponsible acts. His wife left to work overseas, with no reforms, she didn’t come back. She found a better man, taking with her their daughter. Abandoned and depressed, drinking gave my brother refuge to grieve and his grieving gave him refuge to drink, the perfect cycle of doom. He was lost, on and off a psychiatric patient. It wrenched my heart seeing him and my parents tormented as he suffers. Sometimes I wonder how could someone who grew up lavishly with love, comfort and freedom could end up miserable and broken. He, who was unconditionally sheltered and nurtured chose rebellion and defeats.

In life, I lived and learned the hard way but somehow I managed to grow, I struggled yet victorious in the process. Looking back, I have losses and gains, sorrows and joys and found life’s worth overcoming most of my fears. For many years, I’ve been sharing hope, faith and friendship through community service. I became a worker of God’s vineyard, an advocate of fellow OFW’s, a founding leader of small organization, a marketing director in financial service (side career). And still, I continue to equip myself with skills, to explore other possibilities. I discovered too many beautiful places not just riding a city bus but planes. For entertainment, sure I’m enjoying more than a good movie and I now have a better home to stay… as my grandparents hoped for me. Good choices and hard works deserve corresponding rewards. I’m a believer. Failures, I have many, and also simple accomplishments that fulfill. I say “I’m full of blessings”, not curses. I thank God for helping me rise through life’s difficult challenges, for giving me wisdom learning to traverse those valleys of wrong and right choices, for blessing me with grace to accept and forgive rather than holding grudges, trying to change people nor expecting something in return. I thank God for providing me helps; opportunities and chances, wonderful friends and mentors that blessed my path at times I’ve no place and no one to turn to. Above all, in memory of my loving grandparents to whom I’m indebted and forever grateful, I honor them for what I have become, for their pride and confidence in me, for installing in me hopes that carry me all through. For now I don’t have a vast fortune nor high prestige to pass on as legacy but I do have a lasting gift of hope that continuously flicker. Faith to hold, courage to empower, enduring sacrifice with love deeply sown to keep it nourished, my parents and brother, my husband and children fit into my journey of hope. They are, so far, my great living motivators.

Author: Annabelle Libao

*Published in True Friends Newsmag (October 2008 issue)

Si Pango At Si Pangit

2008-12-13T15:31:00.000-08:00

“Ano na naman ba iniiyak-iyak mo dyan, pangit? Kung tutuusin mani-mani (peanuts!) na lang yang ganyang problema sa ‘yo,” sabi ng abest buddy kong si Jayz. “Tumigil ka na’t lalo kang pumapangit pag umiiyak ka,” dagdag ng kumag. Aminin ko ba naman kasi na broken-hearted ako, hayun, sermon at pang-aapi tuloy inabot ko. Sinisi ko nga sya, “Ikaw kasi, kahirap ng matawagan, out of reach palagi, kaya noong may dumating sa buhay ko na walang kwentang kausap na kagaya mo, hayun, nahulog tuloy loob ko sa loko at ngayon out-of-my-life na sya!” (sabay singhot…) Tinawanan ba naman ako ng Jayz. Dagdag ko, “Ganyan! ‘ala ka talaga kwentang pinsan at kaibigan. Sa halip na samahan mo ko sa pag-iyak, ini-engganyo mo pa akong tumawa. ‘ala ka talaga kwenta!” Sagot nya pagkarinig sa tono ng boses ko, “oh, ano tinatawa-tawa mo dyan ngayon? Akala ko ba umiiyak ka kanina?” Sus! Makakilala ka ba naman ng mas baliw pa sa ‘yo?! Kadugo ko nga ‘tong kenkoy na ‘to.

Ganyan lang naman ang takbo ng usapan namin ng kung sino mang nilalang na nakakakilala na sa good-crazy-bad sides ng pagkatao ko. Katulad na lang ng isang Mr B na abot hanggang langit ang respeto ko, kapag na-sense sa email o text message ko na tinutopak ako, sasabihin nyan, “Depressed ka na naman, ano? Hah hah hah, ha!” Kantahan ka ba naman ng halakhak, hai ya! Hindi kailangan ng maraming salita o kaek-ekan na pangungumbinsi na wag na ‘ko mag-emote, just tickle my funny bone at ayos na ayos na ‘ko. At hindi rin kailangan ng maraming salita para malaman ng tunay na kaibigan na wala ka sa “katinuan” (bad-crazy;) –malimit akong atakihin nyan, nya ha ha! Malungkot at masaya ka man, mararamdaman ng kausap mo sa kabilang linya ng telepono, o sa tono ng sulat mo, ‘dinig’ ka, ‘day. Itong klase ng mga nilalang ang bumabalanse sa katinuan ng pag-iisip ko… Hindi ka nga nila dadamayan sa pagluha (”umiyak kang mag-isa, pangit,” sabihin pa sa ‘yo), pakakabagin ka naman sa pagtawa at pagagaanin ang pakiramdam mo sa pang-aasar hanggang sa mawala na sa isip mo ang iyong kadramahan.

Kamakailan lang, sabi ko sa mahal kong dakilang kaibigan, “Thanks for letting me get away with my craziness.” Laking biyaya talaga sya sa mundo ko. Mangilan-ngilan lang ang mga taong marunong ‘bumasa’ sa ‘yo. Sa kanila, di ka matatakot magtanggal ng maskara at nakakasiguro ka na di ka nila tatalikuran malaman man nila ang tunay na ikaw — kung gaano ka masaktan, lumaban, magsaya, humilik, magalit, humagalpak sa tawa, magmura, kumanta ng wala sa tono, maglupasay sa iyak at inis, maglaro… Sa harap nila, tunay na tunay ka — perpektong halimbawa ng napaka-imperpektong pagkatao– taong-tao. Sa kabila ng lahat ng ka-imperpektuhan at kakulangan mo, andyan lang sila sa tabi mo palagi. Hindi man kayo magkita at mag-usap ng madalas, panatag ang loob mo dahil alam mo at nakakasiguro ka na may nagmamahal sa ‘yo at nagtitiwala sa kakayahan mo… na sakyan ang anumang alon na sasalpok sa yo… Ikaw ‘yong surfboard, sila ‘yong malakas na hangin na mag-iihip sa ‘yo sa dalampasigan (sus! sa seashore na tayo ngayon!). Teka, balik tayo sa alon, dapat pagitna sa laot papuntang kabilang ibayo, hindi pabalik sa pinanggalingan. Ano pa man, ang mga kaibigan na ‘to ang nagsisilbing hangin at driving force na magtutulak sa ‘yo para makatawid ka sa destinasyon mo. Ikaw na ‘yong barko, hindi na surfboard, noh!

Ganyan ang malaking silbi at importansya ng best buddies ko kaya kahit tawagin man nila akong ‘pangit’ at ’sira’ palagi, at peace ako dahil ang alam ko… ako lang ang supercute sa life nila. Ayaw lang nila aminin baka lumaki ang ulo ko’t ipagmayabang ko, hek hek hek! Alaskahin man ako ni Jayz, ok lang din kasi alam namin pareho na mas pango ilong nya kesa sa ‘kin.

Author: Joy Marqueses

*Published in TF Newsmag (September 2008 issue)

Best of Bests

2008-12-13T15:27:00.000-08:00

“Ganda, halika huhulaan kita!”, ang sabi ng isang nakasalubong ko habang ako ay naglalakad sa Robinson’s Galleria at nag-wiwindow shopping. Ang kanyang mukha ay tila alanganing babae at lalake. Ang kanyang pangangatawan naman at pati na ang mga bisig ay hitsurang lalake. Feminine siyang kumilos, in fact, medyo pakendeng-kendeng pa nga siyang maglakad. Malantik ang kanyang artipisyal na pilik-mata na obvious na idinugtong lang. Dahil ang kanyang ilong ay matangos, ito ay nakapagpadagdag ng animo’y tunay na anyong babaeng sa kanyang makutim na kulay ng mukha. Halata ang mga wrinkles niya. Ang kanyang edad kung iyong susuriin ay mga 48 pataas. Ang kanyang mga daliring medyo matigas na malantik ay may manicure na kulay pula. Makikita mong medyo burado na ang kyutiks ng mga ilan dito. Makapal ang kanyang eye-liner at eyebrows. May lipstick siya na higit na mapula kaysa karaniwan. Sunog sa araw ang kulay ng balat. Nakasuot siya ng sandals na pambabae at pantalong kulay lumot na tila uniporme ng army; pink ang kanyang t-shirt na may kwelyo; “lacoste” ang tatak nito - ‘yung tipong imitation na “lacoste”.

“Halika na, mura lang,” masuyong anyaya niya.” Marahil ay mas na-enganyo ako sa katangi-tanging hitsura ng nilalang na nasa aking harapan. Para sa akin ay may isa siyang kakatwang katangian. Isang binalake. Kakaiba ngunit may kayumian ang kanyang hitsura hindi kagaya ng mga ibang matataray na baklita. Bihira akong may makausap na ganitong anyo. Kung titingnan mo siyang mabuti ay mapapansin mong hindi siya isang manlolokong tao, nais lang na matulungan ka niya kung ano man ang gusto mong malaman. Kung baga, wala siyang pangingimi at walang halong panlililo. Nababasa kaya niya ang nasasaloob ko ngayo? Alam kaya niya ang aking dinaramdam?” Ito’y isang palaisipan sa akin. Tapat ang kanyang pag-anyaya. Para tuloy akong naging curious, gusto kong subukan kung paano siya manghula.

“Sige, magkano?” Tanong ko. “Mura lang”, sagot niya. Sa totoo lang ayaw kong masyadong magpaimpluwensya sa hula. Naalala ko noong panahon ng aking kabataan, kasama ko ang mga katandaan at halos malibot na naming lahat ng mga magagaling at balitang manghuhula sa kapuluan. Kaya hayun, minsan may mga natutuklasang mga nakakatawa na kagaya ng ang anak niyang ampon ay anak daw ng kanyang Mister sa ibang babae. At ang isa naman ay hindi daw ‘yung boyfriend niya sa kasalukuyan ang makakatuluyan kundi iba…siya nga namang nangyari. Bagama’t para sa akin naman ay gusto ko lang magbakasakali, parang katuwaan lang. ‘Di pa naman ako nabibigo nung mga panahon na ‘yun, at kung may mga manliligaw man, hindi ko pa naman sila pinag-uukulan ng pansin… kaya lang ako sumasama sa kanila ay upang malaman ko ang aking kapalaran tungkol sa aking pangarap na makapag-abroad. Positive naman kung tutuusin ang mga basa sa palad at baraha. Maganda lahat, tungo lahat iyon sa pag-unlad. Ngunit nang ako ay napaanib sa isang relihiyon na kahit ang paglalaro ng baraha ay hindi tinatanggap, pinilit ko ng umiwas sa mga ganito, gaano man kabisa at katotoo ang kanilang mga hula. Mayroon pa nga akong iniwasan na Psychic, na close friend ng aking mga relatives, subalit bukod tanging ako lang ang hindi nagbigay ng pagkakataon upang matingnan ako.Ngunit, ngayon gusto kong subukan ito just for fun. Isa pa malungkot ako ngayon. Para ba akong naging excited sa sasabihin niya.

Iginiya niya ako patungo sa isang simpleng restawran na tipong style ng Mc Donald’s. Habang nakasunod ako sa kanya alam kong siya ay naghahanap ng isang maayos na puwestong walang masyadong tao. Halatang siya ay madalas gumawi dito. Umupo kami sa may bandang sulok. Nagpalinga-linga ako sa paligid. May mga tao ring mangilan-ngilan na kumakain sa loob. Na tila wala naman ding pakialam dahil may kanya-kanya ring pinagkakaabalahan. Ang iba naman ay nagkwekwentuhan lang. May ibang nagpupukol ng tingin sa amin, pero wala lang. Ilang sandali ang makalipas pagkaraan naming makaupo ay inilabas niya ang isang salansan ng baraha. “Binalasa sa tatlo. “Bumunot ka ng tatlo.Kahit saan.” “Naku, yayaman ka!” ang sabi nya pagkakita niya sa diamond na pula. At pagkaraang ilapag ang pusong pula, “Tapat kang magmahal.” At pagkaraan pa ng isa ay: “Masama kang magalit,” bulalas na sabi niya. Ouch! Pagkaraan nito ay isa-isa niyang inihelera ang mga baraha. “Alam mo napakabuti mong kaibigan. Mapagbigay ka. Tumutulong ka sa nangangailangan. Hindi mo matitiis basta’t may lumapit at humingi ng tulong sa iyo. Kapag iniisip mo nagkakatutuo. Pero masama kang magalit, ganda. Iwasan mo yan. Kasi kapag nagalit ka may masamang nangyayari sa tao. Totoo ka kasing tao at napakabuti mong kaibigan. Kaya iwasan mong magalit, ganda ha?” Binalasa na naman niya, “Kuha ka uli ng tatlo….naku hayan, masama ka talagang magalit!” “Pero may nagmamahal sa iyong lapitin ng babae. Nakikinig naman siya sa iyo. Basta’t sinabi mo ginagawa naman niya. Kamuntik na tuloy akong maiyak sa sinabi niya. Dahil ilang araw na akong nagmumukmok dahil sa sama ng loob. Nag-away kami. Love-hate friendship namin ng best of bests ko. Close kasi kami. As far as I know, super special din ako sa kanya the way he treats me….and we treat each other that way. Extra-ordinary and especial nga actually… Whatever. Nakakatuwa nga…close na close kami, pero para kaming aso’t-pusa. “O malapit na tayong matapos,” aniya.

“P’wede ba akong magtanong,” ang sabi ko. “Pero magdadagdag ka ng bayad,” sabi niya. Nagbago ang isip ko, “Ay hindi nalang!” Pero bigla niyang sinabi, “Sige pero isang tanong lang ha?” Ay, isa lang? No choice. Pero sige na nga,” isip ko. “O sige… nababasa mo ba ang nasa isip ko ngayon?” pabirong tanong ko. Binala-balasa niya kunwari ang baraha. At saka niya inihilera ng pataob. Pagkaraan pumipili siya ng barahang inilalapag niya ng nakatihaya. Naghilera siya ng lima. “H’wag kang malungkot, dahil ang mahalaga ay nagkakaunawaan kayo. Kung ano ang nararandaman mo ngayon ay ganon din siya. Gaya ng kung mahal mo siya mahal ka rin niya. Iisa ang damdamin n’yo. Mahalaga ka pa rin sa kanya. Ganon din siya sa iyo. At kung mas sobra pa ang pagtingin mo sa kanya, ganon din siya sa iyo. Marami ang nagkakagusto duon. Pero nakikinig din siya sa iyo.”

Di ko alam kung matatawa o maiiyak ako sa nadinig ko. Kung ‘di lang sulky ang present moment ko, tiyak na mapapahagikgik ako o kaya ay kikiligin to the bones ako. Pero iisa lang ang masasabi ko, manghuhula talaga siya. But at this time, ang tawag ko sa kanya ay soul comforter. Binayaran ko siya ng isang daan, at naghiwalay na kami. Pero isa lang ang nasa isip ko, totoo man o hindi ang kanyang hula, ang importante ay napaglubag niya ang loob ko. At least ngayon, medyo nakakangiti na ako. Sumaya ako sa mga sinabi ni sister-brother - whatever his name was. Dahil ako pa rin pala ang best of bests ng best of bests ko.

Author: Cherrie Mon

*Published in TF Newsmag (September 2008 issue)

Quit Pulling Me Down, Crab!

2008-12-13T15:16:00.000-08:00

I was barely a year in Hong Kong when I met a fellow ‘pinay’ on board a bus. On a twenty-minute ride to Central, she lamented her four-month ordeal on the job. The biggest thorn on the side? Another ’pinay’ co-worker. My heart went out to her. We were on the same boat then. I wondered what happened to her. I hope she got through as I did. It happened six years ago. I stayed on the same job, with the same co-worker, but on a much better situation than the first couple of years. My co-worker and I got along pretty well. We gained each other’s trust and respect. We understood each other’s idiosyncracies. When she snapped, I backed out. When I snapped, she backed out. Sometimes we just knew when to shut up or speak up. Yet, there were times we don’t. But we always get through.

Why is it that instead of supporting our own kind, some of us end up being an additional burden? Being older and longer in the job doesn’t give one the right to demean and boss-around a new worker. Instead of lifting someone up, we choose to put her down. It holds true with the way we treat other people we know. Instead of being happy and proud of someone’s accomplishment, we spit negative criticisms. If a congratulatory remark is ever given, it’s laced with sarcasm. The sort of people who practice these things may be eaten up with envy and jealousy, the green-eyed monsters. It drag down someone’s ascent on the ladder of success. The mentality of a crab…

Co-workers not getting along well is a common problem in Hong Kong. There are employers who tend to take sides– usually the older worker’s or the one who speaks Chinese better since she can defend and explain herself in the employer’s dialect. Premature termination of contract due to workers’ quarrel is not unusual here. Others have the patience and tolerance to work through the duration of the contract or even longer.

How do we deal with a difficult co-worker? My big boss’ advice was: Ignore her. Focus on your work. The advice worked, but not all the time. You cannot just ignore an elephant in a room, especially when it’s shoving its trunk on your face. Apparent and constant rudeness is something you just cannot let go easily. We’re only human, angered by such treatment. It takes a lot of sheer willpower to keep your emotions under control and not blow up.

Confrontation won’t work on someone whose mind and heart are closed. No amount of talking-to can change an old cow’s attitude or penetrate a one-track mind. It’s futile to communicate with one too proud. Cease talk is my way.

When you’re forced to dine together, faces just inches apart, and the loudmouth’s on the phone while eating with you– sprinkling saliva on the food, eat as fast and as much as you can before she realize there’s almost nothing left for her. Bad for digestion but you’ll be teaching her a lesson. If she’s too dense, she won’t get the message.

Just when you think you have peace and quiet after a hard day’s work, there goes the loud mouth on the phone again, talking non-sense to her friends. Plug that earphone into your pretty little ears and listen to a lively music– something to muffle the irritating voice you’re hearing. Or do something constructive– read, write, hum to yourself– just to quieten the fast drumming of your agitated heart brought about by the annoying blabbermouth.

There’s a perfect ingredient to ruin a beautiful morning– a sour-faced housemate. When you’re subjected to it, make it a point not to look at her face. Don’t look at her at all. Back view, side view, which ever angle– don’t! Otherwise, you’re doomed the rest of the day. It’ll put you in a black mood, too.

Being angry is enervating. It will sap you out of energy, crumple your pretty face, add lines on your forehead, inflate your nostrils… make you look like a gorilla, alienating everyone whom you cross paths with. Leave the sour-faced mammal alone. It’s just a moment, it will pass. Everyone goes through a black mood. Give her space, keep your distance for a while. It won’t ever do any good if you join her in that state and be angry, too. If we all subscribe to the philosophy of “an eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth”, the whole world will be blind and toothless… that was what Mahatma Gandhi said. What we all need is empathy and understanding. You can sweeten the mood. If the cranky fellow loves to eat smelly tofu dipped in chili powder (that’s yummy!), include that in your menu for the day; if she loves durian, buy for her; if she loves yellow mini-skirt, find her one. The thing is, you’re reaching out, regardless of how you’re being treated. I’m not asking you to be a doormat, and let someone trample all over you, insult you, and throw dirt on your face. Oh no, that’s a far different thing. Well, you know when you should stand up for yourself. If you have faith in yourself, nobody– not even a darn crab, can ever put you down. But if it does happen and you find yourself at the bottom, just like a cork in the ocean, you will certainly find your way to the surface again.

Author: Joy Marqueses

*Published in The Filipino Now International magazine (March 2007 issue)

Bayaning Luhaan

2008-12-13T14:39:00.000-08:00

Tulala sa isang tabi, walang sinasabi
Hindi maipahayag, damdaming nakakubli
Kung pagmamasdan, walang dinaramdam
Ngunit sa kaibuturan, labis s’yang nasasaktan.

Kung tawagin nga’y bayani, isang katanyagan
Ngunit ang puso ay sadyang sugatan
Bayaning nagtataglay ng kalungkutan
Isa ngang bayani, subalit luhaan.

Sabik sa pamilya, kulang sa pagmamahal
Walang masandalan sa oras ng kalumbayan
Hinahanap na atensyon, di naman makamtan
Dahil mahal sa buhay, ay may kalayuan.

Katanungan sa isip ito ba ang kapalaran?
Ang maging malayo sa mga mahal sa buhay
Hanggang kailan magtitiis ng ibayong kalungkutan
Ang paghihirap ba ay may katapusan?

Lumuluha sa karimlan, tumititig sa kawalan
Nakatingala sa langit, at laging umaasam
Sana’y malampasan ang mga kahirapan
Upang makapiling na ang mga minamahal

Author: Zyrel

*Published in True Friends Newsmag (September 2008 issue)

Could You Be Lorie

2008-12-13T14:35:00.000-08:00

Inflation? Discrimination? A not so hard-knock-down power, we can still hang on lifting the lever. One giant family problem, however, is enough to crush an OFW’s spirit. In Hong Kong today, there are 120,000 working Filipinos. Daily, more than 240,000 stories are told. We hear endless with shades of pink, black, and blue, from Sunny Bay to Tai Tam Hills, from Wanchai bars to St. Alfred’s church.

I love the wisdom of this person when she told me, “What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.” A very inspiring lady with a very inspiring life. Allow me to share to you…

Lorie ran away from home when she was 17 years old. Home was 10 brothers and sisters. She’s the 7th. Their father, a soldier, left them for a call of mission and for a younger wife. Life was hard, a hand to mouth existence. Their mother a market vendor, overburdened with responsibilities, didn’t survive long enough. Tormented, she died of disease.

Lorie was desperate of affection, for a dream of what she is to be, for a place where she feels safe. A 24 year old man found her. They lived together and born 2 sons. Simple and content but not until years later when her refuge, pride and sense of belonging dwindled. The man who promised love and security learned to appreciate smoke, alcohol and other women. A young mother, a domesticated partner, again in a much greater pain and isolation. She headed abroad for redemption-purpose and freedom. Though she missed her beloved sons deeply, hope gave her endurance to hold on, knowing she could provide them a better future. She worked in Dubai for 4 years then bounded to Hong Kong. Her partner remained unchanged, never reciprocates generosity and sacrifice. Vices, distance, silence and the truth of his non-stop affairs (of 2 he made pregnant) pushed Lorie to disclaim hopes and resistance. She’s responsible but also young (32), vulnerable, unloved.

She discovered new friends and new places. For comfort, she became a week-end barfly. She had many failed relationships at varying degree of attachment, casual-deep, platonic-sexual, at different times, with different races. Worst of all doings, she twice had an abortion. Lorie lost confidence and worth. So consumed with guilt and misery that many times she contemplated to simply just vanish on the face of the earth. Having 2 children, reminded unfulfilled dreams, the blessing of chances and choices, realized she has bigger reasons to fight and live.

That was 19 years ago. Currently, her first son is an engineer, the second a nurse. Both thriving, wonderful and the lights of her life. Reconciled to a totally changed man who fathered her children, she finally married him in 2000.

Her reunion with her father released her from prolonged hurts and unforgiveness. At his grave, heart opened, said farewell, prayed, and thankful of the circumstances at young age that brought out the new person that she is. Now, a committed servant of God, straightened, strengthened, grateful, and proud.

Some of you out there will probably say, “Hey, Belle! That’s a good story with a glorious ending, what about us under the dark clouds?” Well, read again, stop at the middle. But I don’t wish you do for as much as I want you to feel the emptiness, guilt, despair, bitterness, I hope you could focus, partake in the hard-fought triumph of selfless sacrifice, perseverance, forgiveness and God’s love.

And I can also tell you stories with sorrowful end. Tales of failed dreams, of broken relationships, of abused sacrifice, of tragic events. Each of us has different stories to tell, struggles to cope. Down, dispirited, yung iba tumigil nang magsaya, umasa at mangarap. Harsh realities can pierce human heart and soul. Choices we do make, to dwell in the alley of darkness or to walk up and follow the path to light.

Like Lorie, I also believe in God. Just as when my grandmother always reminds me, “Troubles are God’s opportunities of calling us to Him.” And that if we face them with a humble heart, place our faith in God, and take the next right action, we will come through them better and stronger.

I have my own share of struggles yet thankful that I have help, and light when I needed. We might be crushed but not broken, struck down but not buried, abandoned but will never be forsaken. I do believe that there is good to be found even in the worst of situations if only we can gather the strength to look for it… the silver linings are always there.

Author: Annabelle Libao

*Published in TF Newsmag (September 2008 issue)

On Mentors And Fathers

2008-12-13T13:26:00.000-08:00

We honor the fathers who played important roles in our births — biological, social, psychological, intellectual, emotional, spiritual or national… and all throughout our growths. The fathers: biological fathers who’ve gone beyond being mere sperm donors; adopted fathers whose hearts we’ve grown into; social fathers who’ve induced us to give birth to our creative, intellectual selves and watch closely the very first steps as we trod along our chosen fields; fathers who’ve taken us under their wings and let us grow our own while egging us on to fly, and fly high — our mentors.

When we’re being acknowledged for the roles we play, it fuels us to give more and accomplish more. Being appreciated gives tremendous inspiration. Nothing beats the feeling of being held significant in someone’s life. Knowing that we matter makes a huge difference. We feel loved and honored. When I greeted my friend earlier a “happy father’s day”, I got an unexpected reply… “Thanks. Same to you.”

“Same to you.” Three simple touching words. I love words and these three top my best-list right now. My friend acknowledges my role as a dad. Ain’t that sweet? I’m proud to be a mom-dad to my son. Anyway, I have more balls and em>chutzpah than the spineless ‘Dads’. ;)

Let’s go back to my dearest friend, the unsung hero — OFW dad. My mentor. He held the print media door open and shoved me right in; taught me the literary walk; coached me the literary talk; tapped me gently to sprout my wings… all the while I’m under his wings. When I couldn’t tie the pieces together; words a jumble or a whole darn article lack luster, the man pushes me to probe, ponder, tinker and liven it up more. Awww! I could’ve wrung his neck :) He wanted me to make the impossible possible, man! But he’s sweet, undemanding and non-bossy so I perkily obliged and write-it-away. Bring hope where there’s none. It’s no easy task to talk full of life when you’re dying inside. It’s lighting up a cave by striking two stones together to create a spark. When Mr B instructs me to turn a negative-sounding article to a positive one, he’s not just helping in my writing but more so on my mental and emotional well-being… from hopeless to awe-inspiring. He guides me to the start line and directs me to the right finish line…

Boy, am I ever so lucky? What with an editorial assistant role in my mentor’s editorship?! I recently asked his permission to let me test my wings on Canadian air. His reply, “The higher, the better…” But I don’t have sturdy wings just yet, I guess. I can get through anything. Mr B sees me. He hears me. And Jus just greeted his poppymom “Happy father’s day, Mommy!” Hah! I’m flying high!

Author: Joy Marqueses

*Published in True Friends Newsmag (August 2008 issue)

Life Is Goodbye, Life Is Hello

2008-12-13T12:28:00.000-08:00

Have you ever sat and cried– disturbed and lonely — in a strange place in a strange city, longing for your family, your dog, your own bed? Did you ever have to leave home for good to earn a living, but it didn’t feel good at all? Have you ever watched a house you used to live in get torn down? Or painted an ugly color by the new owners? Have you ever moved into a brand new office much better than your old one and felt out of place and uneasy? Have you moved the furniture in your living room and felt confused for days not knowing why, because you really like the new arrangement much better than it was before. Have you finally taken the trip to Las Vegas, Europe or Asia, delighted with everything you see but counting days until you can look at your own front door again?

People are so mobile for their own reasons: adventure, education, better living, exploration and so many more. I, myself did it to escape the life that I didn’t like. To find myself where I belong and be more comfortable. But being here for all these years, I must say that I’m not really there yet. There are things in this life that I am still searching. Where?… I don’t know. I still feel that sometimes I don’t belong here and longing to be back to where I came from. Or be in a place that I feel a real HOME. *Places are important. Place is how you define your sense of space - of what is your space. You know how you feel in your own space.* Life is secure. Your own responses are predictable. I lost the space that I thought I have. I am suffocated in my own space… No ventilation…Vanishing sign of life like a fog disappearing as the clearance of a day. Lose a space that means “home” to you and your whole psychological system may be askew, sometimes much to your surprise or shame. Is this something to be ashamed of? No… I am like every other creature of nature. I like to know my own territory, proclaim my own boundaries - if not to the world, at least to myself that I am independent.

A lot of moving around can upset the system. Your body might let you know how little you like physical changes, even intellectually you pride yourself on being easy-going and persuasive. Think of all the little secret griefs that accompany every exciting move or trip. Subtle griefs, not ones that you would call out loud by name. You might think of them as stresses or difficulties in adjustment. But something quietly important to you has been left behind. If it’s true that you are feeling some unspecific and illogical sadness, find out what it is about the old place that holds meaning for you.

Recognition makes letting go much easier. The new places, after all, might be better, in their own ways, given a chance - given new meaning. Things change. No one stays the same. You were once young, grown-up and in a spur of a moment, aged. Life moves. We move with it or die. But there are natural resistances within us; even organisms born to change - fight it. From the safety of sameness, we confront the possibility of change, with fear, tension, then yielding—–letting be. We grieve for change, yet we grow through change.

Author: Precy Pilorin

A Message From The Guild

2008-12-13T12:18:00.000-08:00

In the absence of our President Ms. Cathy Montano, who is currently in London, I was given the privilege of writing this column to keep you informed and share my feelings. I am grateful for the opportunity to be its External Vice President for External Affairs. I find my position more of a challenge than a responsibility as I am enjoying it. Since I joined the group, it has given me the chance to explore myself in the world of writing. With the encouragement and motivation brought by The Guild, my thoughts, ideas and opinions are now expressed and heard. It also opened doors of opportunity to meet new people, gain new friends and try new things.

Last July 13, I represented The Guild during Passi City Iloilo Association of Hongkong’s Quest For Pretty Boyz King 2008. It was a first official function for me and the experience was so great. It made me decide to explore more of our bjectives. The group, under the leadership of Ms Wilma Padura and Secretary General Ms. Noemi Paniza, is indeed a true picture of unity. Our congratulations to all of you for a truly well done job! I hope that it was the first of many. To be given the chance to learn new skills is a chance that I will cherish forever. Working for The Guild, I see it as a giving and receiving process. It wishes to help, improve our lives and also give an opportunity to share our skills and talents to interested individuals. Skills that we may not even know we have. On behalf of The Guild, I want you to know that we welcome you to join our group. We are not only in writing and services but we also try to include everyone with different interests as much as possible. Thus said, we are in the process of organizing our very own dancing and singing group! Be part of our journey, keep in touch and we will be glad to hear from you.

My special thanks to our patron, Mrs. Anne Marden; our publisher, Ms. Catherine Kaldy and our editor Mr. Tony Bartolome. Likewise to our advisers Mr. Shaun Kelly, Mr.Marc Hansford, Mr. Mernie Weeks, Ms. Christine Fong . Thank you also to our editorial assistant, Ms. Joy Marqueses, who is now one of my idols in this new-found world. It’s a pleasure to meet people like you. Many thanks too, to my employer, Mrs Clara Lee and her family for all their support and understanding. And to all of you, thank you very much for all your support and for believing in us. Mabuhay po tayong lahat.

Author: Malyn Galicia

*Published in True Friends Newsmag (August 2008 issue)

Ang Bestfriend Kong Kikay

2008-12-13T12:13:00.000-08:00

Naniniwala ba kayo sa kasabihang “bestfriends are best enemies?” Hindi ako naniniwala sa kasabihang ito … nasa nagdadala yan, di ba? Si Condessa Guerrero ang bestfriend ko. Long-legged siya kaya siyempre siya ay matangkad. Hindi siya kagandahan pero ang mahalaga ay maganda ang kalooban niya kumpara sa kanyang panlabas na anyo. (Sana hindi siya masasaktan pag nabasa niya ito.) Pwede sana siyang pang model kasi matangkad sa karaniwang Pinay (5′6). Kaya lang korte kwatro-kantos ang katawan niya, plus iyong 5 kilos na bilbil niya at may tig-ilang barya rin sa legs niya. Sa unang tingin mo pa lang sa kanya o first time na nakasalamuha ay agad kang mangingimi na batiin siya at sasabihin mo ring super suplada siya kasi ang expression ng mukha siya ay napaka-istrikto talaga. Pero sa totoo lang kikay pala siya. Daig pa niya si Ai-Ai delas Alas kung magpatawa dahil komikera at medyo magkahawig pa yata sila dahil pareho silang kamag-anak ng yumaong si Babalu. Nagtataka nga kaming mga friends niya kung bakit wala man lang talent scout na nakatuklas sa pagiging kikay at komedyante siya. Sayang nga, eh, dahil malapit na siyang mag-golden anniversary sa ibabaw ng lupang hinirang pero imbes na mapabilang sana siya sa mga iniidolong komedyante at kontrabida sa TV man o sa pelikula ay kung saan-saang lupalop na ng mundo siya napadpad para magpaalila. Tatlong barako ang mga anak ni bestfriend pero kung umasta ay parang dalaga kahit kuwarenta y siete na siya.

Si bestfriend ay tapos ng kursong Edukasyon at may walong taong nagturo ng elementarya sa Pilipinas subalit mas pinili niyang magtrabaho sa ibang bansa sa akalang madaling makaipon sa abroad dahil mas mataas ang sahod; akala niya ay gaganda at puputi siya pag nag abroad; at buong akala niya ay ito ang napakadaling daan para makapunta sa Canada. Ayun nga at dala-dala niya pati ang nakalaminate niyang high school diploma. At pati ang gutay-gutay at inaamag na niyang birth certificate na pinahalungkat niya sa kapatid niyang duling — na siya na lang naiwan sa family house nila dahil sa kasamaang-palad ay nag-iisa pa rin sa buhay kahit 59 ½ years old na siya dahil walang lalaking naduling sa angkin niyang ganda — ay dala-dala rin niya saan mang bansa siya mapadpad para magpaalila.

Isang araw ng Linggo ay sinadya niyang pumuntang mag-isa sa Kowloon Park dala ang ilang pocketbooks na kunwari ay babasahin niya habang naka-upo sa isang bench doon. Pero ang talagang pakay niya ay mamingwit ng lalaki – puti man o itim, para lang alamin kung may karisma pa siya. Walang anu-ano ay may tumabi sa kanyang black man — matangkad, guwapo, superkinky ang maiksing buhok, maganda ang katawan kaya lang makapal daw ang labi. (Sabagay medyo makapal din ang labi ng bestfriend ko kaya bagay sila.) Nagkakilala, nagkwentuhan at naging magkaibigan. Then niyaya raw siya ni blackie sa kanyang pad the next Sunday para ipakilala sa mga relatives and friends nito na, of course, ay mga black din.

Dumating ang araw ng Linggo at noong alam kong nandoon na siya ay tinawagan ko siya. Hayun at tuwang-tuwa ang bruha dahil sa lahat ng mga naroon ay siya raw ang pinaka-maputi. Ngipin lang daw ng mga blacks ang mas maputi kaysa sa kanya. Pero ang masaklap imbes na siya ang pakainin, dahil siya ang buwisita, ay siya naman daw ang niyayang maglibre sa kanila dahil nga sa mas maputi siya kaysa sa kanila. Imbes na maimbiyerna ay pinagbigyan daw niya sila kaya ang mga blackies ay natuwa sa kanya. Pero nangako siya na iyon na ang una at huling punta niya doon baka maubos lang ang pera niya sa kalilibre sa kanila.

Ito ang kwento ng bestfriend kong kikay. Marami pa sanang karugtong kaya lang di ko naman sure kung mapipiling mai-publish… sayang lang ink ko.

Author: Noralin Madriaga

*Published in TF Newsmag (August 2008 issue)

So Far And Yet So Close

2008-12-13T11:35:00.000-08:00

I met him on a hot summer day in April 2005 in Baguio City. He is such a good man, talented, good-looking, smart and oh, let me tell you this, I love his sense of humor…a lot! For me, nothing is more tiresome than a humorless person. I always burst out laughing every time we talk, goodness! He’s always got something nice to say. He’s always up for a laugh-not least at himself- he can surely ruminate amusingly about any subject you care to bring up. He is a clown in times of milk and honey and everyone’s counsel in times of distress. I came to admire him as a person. I admire his kindness, dedication to his job, fortitude and strength.

Eventually, we became good friends. “Hi, She, kumusta? You are so pretty!”, he used to say. I would say, “Ows? Are you talking to me? D’you say that to all the girls?” He will smile and say..”Errr…errr…what…nooo naman, sa’yo lang, promise!” “Hmp! Bola!” I’d snort back and walk away. He never forgets to call every time he gets a chance. “Hello She, na miss ko boses mo ah, are you okay?” he would ask. “Ha ha! Talaga lang? I’m doing great, thank you,” goes my usual answer. He always initiate a topic at ‘di namin namamalayan isang oras na kaming nagbobolahan. We talked about our younger days, about our work, experiences, current events, movies, well, everything. Name them, napag-usapan na namin! At this point we have developed our friendship in a deeper sense. There is trust and respect for each other. He is the only person with whom I can share my dreams - what I’m going through - about my feelings, fears and frustrations. Talking to him lifts up my spirit. During that time, I was still on the process of picking up my shattered self and fixing my broken heart caused by someone na walang ginawa kundi manakit. For a year, absolutely nothing, no one, no words or expression could repair what was broken in my heart or could bring back what I believed was taken from me. But there he was. He made me smile again. He’s always there whenever I need someone to talk and turn to. He always listens without judging what he heard. He encouraged and comforted me and helped me see life in a renewed perspective. And then it’s time for me to go back to Hong Kong. There were those times when he tried to express his feelings. He would send me text messages like “what I admire most in a woman are beauty, brain and principles, you’ve got them all”. Or some forwarded sweet messages but I just laugh at them and took them as a joke. Sometimes he will invite me to attend special events etc. well, I just ignored everything and then I started avoiding him. We are good friends and I don’t want our friendship to be ruined because I feel that we are better friends than lovers? I dunno! feel ko lang… I’ve tried to avoid him for months and months and months and he kept on calling and sending me text messages - “bakit ‘di ka na nagpaparamdam, She? Galit ka ba? I miss you!”.

After sometime, I cut my number off, went back to the Philippines for a vacation without informing him. I stayed in Manila most of the time so as to avoid seeing him for we are from the same town. But what a small world, of all places, of all people, could you believe that we’ve crossed ways? “She!” he called out. I turned around and saw him. He never changed a bit. He’s still that charming and smart guy I met about 2 years ago. The one who makes me laugh, encourages me, comforts me and loves me as no one else could. We hug each other at kinuha niya ang number ko. Then he called me the following day. We saw each other and he invited me to his place for dinner. There was no further discussion about my long silence, what matters most he said was that, right at that moment I was with him. He gently held my hands and kissed me so passionately and I’ve found myself wholeheartedly kissing him back, surrendering my heart and soul.

“I thought, I will never feel this way again, you bring so much happiness into my life and so much love into my heart, I’m so afraid to love you, I really am. Okay lang ba na kalimutan mo na lang ako?” I told him. But he shot back: Hey, of you think na makakawala ka pa, you are wrong, kay tagal kitang hinintay, umasang makita ka at nangarap na makasama at ngayon sasabihin mo na kalimutan kita? No way! Then right there and then, we started planning for our future…yeah, that fast! We spend the remaining days together before my flight back to HK and he was heading somewhere too. We have so much fun, we laugh at the same thing. We spend the night out, strolling, listening to a live band, we both love music, art, nature and adventures; yeah, we have lots of things in common.

As we lay in bed one night, I told him what I like most in a man. “First of all, dapat may sense of humor, well-experienced, well-traveled, talented, bolero, sinungaling and you know what - you’ve got them all.” He laughed so hard it tickled me to death. Then parting time came. He sent me to the airport and said goodbye. We both knew it’s going to be difficult, we just need to trust and love each other. We agreed that communication is a must. He called me everyday and we sent each other messages through letters, emails, and SMS but the most wonderful thing about our relationship are those sweet memories that we both share while we’re apart. Our hearts are in such a whirl of happy moments and the thought that every day bring us a little closer assures us that this separation won’t last forever. Sometimes two people find that no matter how close they are and how much they love each other, life’s road will take them in different directions… at least for a while.

To you sweetheart, thank you for loving me as I am. I love the way you caress my soul, the way we dream about us. This is it - no turning back! I love the sweetest thing you do and how you are so kind, patient and understanding. Thanks for cheering me up, you always make my day. I miss the way we laugh together with our silly jokes and stories. I appreciate the way you make me feel and the way you make me whole. I like the way you say “I love you” that reaches my heart down to my soul.

Author: Shirley Tamayo

*Published in TF Newsmag (August 2008 issue)

Kunyang

2008-12-13T11:26:00.000-08:00

Kunyang, maid, alila, katulong — magkakaibang bigkas pero iisang kahulugan. Kunyang sa Chinese kung tawagin. Tuwing uuwi tayo sa Pilipinas at may magtanong, “Anong work mo sa HK?” Simpleng sagot mo, “Eh ano pa, di kunyang.“ Medyo okey sa pandinig lalo na’t ang mapagsasabihan mo ay walang karanasan na naging kunyang dito sa Hong Kong. May dating kumbaga. Yan po ang katotohanan, ‘di ba? Pero ano at sino nga ba ang kunyang sa Hongkong?

Ahhh… kami po yung mga Pilipinang nakakalat d’yan sa Central pag araw ng Linggo. Nakaupo sa tabi ng kalye, sa parke, may latag na d’yaryo, may munting tahanan na yari sa karton. Munting tahanan namin, alam mo? Walang bubong, walang pintuan at walang kusina pero masaya kami. Sama-sama ang magkakaibigan, parang iisang pamilya. Parang fiesta sa dami ng pagkaing nakalatag sa aming hapag na semento o kaya’y kartong pinatuwad. Swerte kapag birthday mo, kasi kahit wala kang pangblow-out, engrande ang handa mo. Patak-patak kasi ang miyembro. Paiiyakin ka habang pinahihipan ang cake na regalo nila. ‘Pag may okasyon, Mother’s Day? S’werte mo, Nanay, kasi kahit malayo si Tatay may rose ka galing sa kaibigan at may kiss pa.

Iyakan, tawanan, asaran. Tahanan nami’y punung-puno ng sikreto ng aming mga hinaing sa hirap na dinaranas namin dito. Lahat ng problema sa aming amo, dito namin isinisiwalat. Problema sa pamilya sa Pilipinas, dito rin nalulutas. Ala-sais pa lang, hapunan namin ay ilalatag na dahil bawat isa sa amin ay may curfew. ‘Di doon pup’wedeng lumagpas. Lagot ka kay amo. Kaya ayaw man namin matapos ang masaya naming huntahan, kailangan naming gumayak. Munti naming tahana’y muling aming gigibain upang sa susunod na Linggo kami’y muling may matirhan. Dahil uuwi muna kami sa aming tunay na tahanan. Doon po kami tinatawag na tunay na kunyang.

Author: Maricel Manzanal

*Published in TF Newsmag (August 2008 issue)

Solemn Images

2008-12-13T11:12:00.000-08:00

On Saturday July 24 of the year 1999, God painted the sky soft blue and accented it with billowing clouds. He spiced the air with crispness. While most parts of the country during rainy season are struck by floods, endless typhoons, traffic jams, brownouts… the Bocaue Church in solemn illuminates, its aisle covered with flowers of different shades and scents. After the sponsors were seated, the bride’s march commanded our heads to turn. Nene wears an elegant white-laced chiffon gown adorning her tall body frame and sweet smiling face, eyes locked to the gaze of her groom, Melvin, awaiting at the altar.

Nene honored me as one of her bride’s maids. It was a perfect day to witness and experience happy moments. Right after the exchange of vows, we proceeded at the grandly decorated indoor reception. Lunch was superb and lovely. The tossed bride’s bouquet landed on my lap, one of the groom’s men received the ring garter, he then put the ring garter in one of my legs and had the privilege of a free kiss. The audience roared with cheers and teases as all eyes were set on us and also to my fiancee, blushing seated just on a nearby table. It certainly was a ritual, in Bulacan’s wedding celebration, I can’t forget and most enjoyed.

Nene deserved that special day. She’s a very responsible person, a wonderful friend, a dependable one. We met at the Catholic Renewal in 1992. Together, we grew in the knowledge and service of Christ while striving to find worthiness as OFWs here in Hong Kong. Our friendship’s nourished by countless Fellowships Days; we go to other island to swim, ride bicycle or just have a quiet picnic. She loves to cook, she never failed to bring me samples of culinary works, her version of palabok and custard cake were the best. Some Saturday nights, I would sneak into her room so we could finish or design new projects, passion for handicrafts - an expression of creativity we share and eventually became part of our generous gift-giving. I can’t name an occasion that we missed, exchanging gestures of appreciation and love. We were not loveless but finding greater purpose, many times we joined group of single women in study and prayers searching for contemplative life at St. Paul Convent… dreaming to become a nun. Tough and rough days, we share anguishes, wept, sang, prayed - always there for each other.

I was scheduled to be married a week after her wedding. Away from home, with only limited days of vacation, grand or simple, wedding preparation consumes many months of anxieties and worries. Thankful, generous friends and sponsors gave cash gifts lessening our burden on expenses. While I busy myself working on major details like food, venue and entourage, Nene on her own made my pressured days a little lighter and speedy to bear. She took charge on the printing of invitations, shopped for souvenirs (tokens) and even found a competent seamstress to sew my wedding dress. Her sacrifices didn’t end there. Surprisingly, she arrived with a jeep-full of families in time of our traditional Ilocano pre-wedding dance party - the night before the wedding. From Bulacan to our town Quezon (Isabela) was an enduring back-aching-bumpy-8-hour trip and she obviously spared few of her numbered honeymoon days (she needed to come back to HK that week).

And so on the same Saturday (July 31, 1999), with the Sacrament of Matrimony, Nestor and I received God’s Blessing at St. John Bosco Parish Church. God was so gracious to us. Sunshine and green grasses complemented our outdoor reception creating the day beautiful and memorable, making all the witnesses cheerful, the foods tasteful, and the music perfect in tunes. Pride and joy overwhelmed me, surrounded by loved ones and friends. Equally like and having the presence of Nene, captured photographs and videos stored colorful memories. Her wedding day and mine revered mental images to cherish, that both warm our hearts up to this date.

I came back in Hong Kong a year ago and had a chance to be united with Nene before she went to Spain. Now I have 2 kids, she has one. Miles apart but still glued by love and remembrance. On the occasion of our wedding anniversary, she sent me a postcard with this message:

Belle love,
Buenas Dias! This is the picture of Barcelona Cathedral and it symbolizes a lot about you and me. I miss you and our friendship. The shared joys and pains, of scarcities and abundances, everyday. I want you to know that you are being remembered. I live just nearby and I always come here for prayer. This July, my wishes are the same like 9 years ago - that your marital life be blessed for you are such a wonderful friend
to me and to others. Finest things your heart so desires, may God grant
them according to His riches and glory.
Happy, happy anniversary amiga! Let’s keep counting!
In His witness and love,
Nene San Diego Galang and family

The same value holds true within my heart. The church signifies not only the place where Sacraments are received, prayers are granted, unforgettable memories are created, like Nene and me, it is also a place where the best friendships are made.

Author: Annabelle B. Libao

*Published in TF Newsmag (August 2008 issue)

Tibo Ka Ba?

2008-12-13T11:00:00.000-08:00

Sit down…let’s talk about lesbian prejudice. An issue that concerns us all as parent, brother, sister, friend, teacher, artist, doctor… Okay, let me ask you a very direct question! Do you like lesbians? Well, Shirley Tamayo hates them. Yeah, that’s absolutely right. Aaminin ko, I’m one of those who thinks that they are irresponsible in their social and personal lives.

Hepps! Don’t get mad at me, that was about 5 years ago and don’t worry, not anymore. Peace! You can’t blame me naman eh. Look, I grew up in a very conservative religion. Since I was born and was raised by my grandmother who is sooo conservative and may I add, I lived in a community that considered homosexuals as immoral where, in the representation of their lives, they are invisible. I once belonged to a community where its structures, expectations and divisions has fostered wrong ideas about homosexuality.

In Hong Kong, I came to understand what homosexuality really is all about. (Someday I would like to write more about it, that is, pag pumayag si Editor). Being a lesbian, I’m sure, isn’t madali. It has difficulties straight people may never even understand, the way I do. I am in no way saying that I am an expert on sexual orientation or a psychologist but, for sure, I do know how it feels like to be offended, abandoned and rejected, or worse, to be treated a second class citizen. I understand why you’ll get upset when someone laughs at you because you’re a lesbian and how it hurts you so bad when your loved ones disregard you as a member of the family. And worst, when you feel like as if the whole world is against you (kawawa ka naman).

In fact, that is merely the reason why some lesbians are afraid to make ladlad, especially those who are in the Philippines na mostly are devout Catholics, alam naman natin na against sila sa third sex ‘di ba? And as what I am saying, mas gugustuhin pa nilang magpa-girly look than being condemned. It’s frustrating kasi that people never give up interfering, criticizing and chastising them. I don’t seem to understand why some people couldn’t embrace homosexuality as they do heterosexuality and that being lesbian does not make them
less lovable and unique. So what ba kung ganuon sila? Do they really have to be miserable all their lives?

If you are a lesbian, that’s alright, believe me. Ms. Dorothy Thompson, once recognized as one of the most influential columnist in a 1939, said, “One cannot exist today as a person in full consciousness without having a showdown with one’s self, without having to define what one lives by, without being clear in one’s own mind what matters and what does not”.

Mapalad ang mga lesbians sa Hong Kong because a great number of heterosexuals really understand and accept them. I am glad that many are active members of responsible associations and they’re contributing a lot to the Filipino community.

Let me salute you all, (except for those who are laman ng mga discos and karaoke bars na umiinom, naninigarilyo at nagsusugal during their days off. And watch out, ladies… may mga lesbian na babaero diyan at peperahan ka pa daw huh… kidding!)

In all seriousness, as an OFW and being a lesbian, how much do you want to succeed in life? Do you have enough courage to bare your true self? Do you have the strength to change others’ wrong perception of you? Do you have enough will-power to continue your goals when the rest of the world is telling you it will never work? Well, there is a price tag of misery attached to those. Oooppss! I’m sorry, did I scare you? People are people and if you listen to them, no doubt you will fail but if you listen to yourself, you can’t lose. Sabi nga ni Sir Bill Cosby, “I don’t know the road to success but one sure way to failure is trying to please everybody”. Forget what everybody wants, what your parents want, what people want. Decide for yourself who you are, what you desire to express and experience: what do you want! Whaaat…?

Are you telling me na gusto mo nang maging tunay na babae? Some psychologist said that one’s sexual orientation determined at birth, puberty, marriage, etc. will remain as is or all time. Now, don’t ask me what is the cause of homosexuality or may gamot ba para supilin ito? Honestly, I don’t know the answer because up to now, sa dinami dami ng mga interested scholars that came up from these studies they all ended up with inconsistent and inconcurrent results. So, just keep up the good work, pare, keep doing things you know will improve your life and enhance your status. Remember, you are doing just fine..fine..fine..! And we, at True Friends Newsmag, together with The Writer’s Guild, are here to encourage and support you in all you do and as you celebrate every little thing about yourself. MABUHAY!

Author: Shirley Tamayo

*Published in True Friends Newsmag (Cover story for August 2008 issue)

Once Upon A Time

2008-12-13T10:57:00.000-08:00

We, as Filipinos, grew up with unforgettable “kasabihans” from our elders. Honestly, I still turn around my dinner plate each time our singer, Willy, leaves the table early — kasi baka ‘di na s’ya makapag-asawa! Seriously though, there is one “traditional saying” that endeared me most — “Ang taong hindi marunong lumingon sa kanyang pinaggalingan ay hindi makararating sa kanyang paroroonan!”. Well, contemporarily speaking, this adage refer to our utang-na-loob values. However, as a citizen and the man that I have now become, I see a broader perspective in this “saying”.

As Filipinos, we should learn to dig deep into our past to understand our history as a people and a nation so that we can have a better foresight of things to come. Our ignorance of our glorious past makes us less confident to regain our rightful place in the community of nations.

Once upon a time, our land gave birth to its most famous son — Dr. Jose Rizal — undoubtedly the pride of the Malay race. Rizal, a man whose 35 years of life had been chronicled as packed with varied achievements both in academic and artistic field proved that the Filipino people has the capacity to equal if not excel even those who have oppressed and treated him as a slave. Professor Ferdinand Blumentritt, Rizal’s Austrian friend and rector of the Imperial Atheneum of Leitmeritz, said, “Rizal was the greatest product of the Philippines and his coming to the world was like the appearance of a rare comet, whose rare brilliance appears only every other century.” A German friend, Dr. Adolf B. Meyer, director of the Dresden Museum, remarked, “Rizal’s many-sidedness was stupendous.” Local historians describe Rizal as the “versatile genius.” He was an actor, musician, linguist, sculptor, journalist, archeologist, botanist, ophthalmologist, pharmacologist, physician, etcetera etcetera – all of these in about 15 years of his adult life. That proves that we are capable of greatness! Can you tell me of anybody in this part of the world who have come close to what Rizal has achieved? If we move forward in not so distant past, more specifically in the early 60’s, our country is the envy of our Far East Asian neighbors for its economic and social standing. Even Hong Kong residents send their relatives to pursue higher education in our country hoping for a more secure and brighter career.

So you see, we are not an inferior race nor that can it be said to our people as a nation. But we cannot escape the blame for what our country have become now. We have allowed ourselves to be manipulated by the powers-that-be! Our parents, brothers, sisters, friends and loved ones do not have the chance to see the outside world and so they are unaware that in other parts of the world, efficient government exist; that public officials are accountable and sensitive to scandals that they resign; that public utilities such as electricity, water supply, communication and transportation are functional. As OFWs, we are aware of all these! Therefore, we have the obligation to inform them, to educate them and compel them to choose morally upright people to lead our barangays, our cities, provinces and eventually our beloved country.

My father, whom I admire for his Solomonic wisdom, told me that once upon a time, President Magsaysay deputized not the police, not the military but just the ROTC to watch over the national election of that time and it went down into our history as the cleanest election we ever had. So again, we are capable of being honest! And so, we may be labeled globally as household helpers, copy-cat entertainers, or even prostitutes but that is inherent to our ability to survive (kapit na tayo sa patalim, ‘ika nga). What is incomprehensible to me (nakakasuka talaga) is for Filipinos to be branded as cheaters, liars, forgers and worse yet, violent people in the eyes of the international community — thanks to our leaders who shamelessly display their misconstrued brand of public service while the OFWs suffer the humiliation and insult in our daily struggle to be accepted as a dependable and trustworthy worker.

In1982, after the failed assassination to the life of the then Ambassador Emmanuel Pelaez (ex-Vice President of the Philippines), he asked the famous question to the then QC police chief Tomas Karingal, “General, what is happening to our country?” Ironically, years later, General Karingal died violently in the hands of an assassin. (Remember the song “Time In A Bottle”?) For me, that holds true today, I want to ask the same question to our leaders: What is happening to our country today?

Author: Tony Bartolome, Editor/Art Director, True Friends Newsmag

The Guild

2008-12-13T10:40:00.000-08:00

Our writing mirrors the pain and joy of our experience. In knowing who we are and writing from it, we help the world by giving it understanding. We reach out and let our concerns be known. We speak out against injustices. We fulfill our function… and we can do so, more effectively, not just as individuals but as part of the community.

The Writers’ Guild is one nurturing community. Our own. Within which, you’re accepted, understood, trusted and respected as a valuable being; where one is encouraged to learn and grow. As members, we have a responsibility to write as truthfully as we can, and to live as truthfully as we can. We don’t confine ourselves to works of arts and literature but extend to humanitarian works. We expand our boundaries. We create The Guild’s projects — benefiting not just our small community but the much larger communities as well.

When you’re in The Guild. You know you’re not alone. In times of personal adversity, The Guild is one support system… where friendships deepen, bonds strengthened, and human respect heightened. One other very special thing about The Guild is that, it’s powered and well-supported by wonderful, loving, kind souls — our mentors, advisers, publishers and benefactors. We thank them profusely for making our voices be heard.

As Natalie Goldberg said, “We are important and our lives are important, magnificent really, and their details are worthy to be recorded. This is how writers must think, this is how we must sit down with pen in hand.” Our details are important. Write on… unafraid, uninhibited, uncensored! It’s freedom. It’s the greatest high.

Author: Joy Marqueses, True Friends Newsmag

*Published in True Friends Newsmag (August 2008 issue)

wordsmiths' nook

Call It Greed

Cutting Edge

Pasaway Na Puso

Year Of The Ox

Kaylupit Mo Pag-ibig

The Beauty of New Zealand

Worthwhile Pursuits

Too Much Power Corrupts

Of Vision, Division And Prevention (Rising Above Negative Criticism)

Tsao Mentality Explored

Letting Go

The One

Hidden Value

Konsensiya

Career In Information Technology & Communication (I.C.T.)

Pakialam (Mensahe Sa Tula)

Kalusugan Ay Kayamanan

Away In A Manger

O Ikaw! Tsismosa Ka Ba?

Multi-Tasking -- OFWs' Tool For A Progressive Future

Housing, Scholarship, And Retirement Scheme For Low-Earning OFWs

Laws, Rules, And Codes

10 Batas Para Sa Mga Bayaning OFW

Simply Vergissmeinnicht

The Girl Who Led Me Astray

Casualties Of War

A First

Engkwentro

The Departed

The loving support of family and friends helped but the ache of loss could not be assuaged. In a birthday party 5 weeks after the burial of one that has been called to heaven, Kongkong (grandpa), my lady boss’ father is still sorrowing over the death of a brother, his best friend for 72 years.

Author: Annabelle Libao

*Published in True Friends Newsmag (November 2008 issue)

Nakaw Na Pag-ibig

Mga kababayan nandito na naman tayo. Sama-sama nating harapin ang mga problemang dumarating sa atin lalo na sa ating mga mahal sa buhay. At ating pag-usapan ang karamihan ng mga nangyayari sa atin na kadalasan, kung hindi pera ay ang ating mga asawa.

There’s only one happiness in life. That is, to love and to be loved. And not to share with the partner of your neighbor. As written in the bible –- “Thou shall not covet thy neighbor’s wife.”

Author: Ed Roquel, True Friends Newsmag

The Angela In Our Lives

In Memory Of Angela

Author: Amy Gunnacao

Ikaw Ang Aking Buhay

Nang maramdaman ko ang iyong pagpintig,Napuno ng sigla ang aking daigdigIpinangako sa sarili na sa iyo iaalay,Lahat ng makakaya, kahit ang aking buhay.

Habang ikaw nga ay nasa aking sinapupunan,Bawat paggalaw mo’y sadyang hinihintayKaligayahan ang hatid sa puso’t isipanAng ngiti sa labi ko ay hindi napaparam

Ang iyong pagsilang ay pinananabikanHindi ko mahintay na ikaw ay mahawakanAt nang makita ka wala akong masambitIsa kang munting anghel na kaloob ng langit

Dumaloy sa mata ko luha ng kaligayahanHabang yakap kita sa aking kandunganIka’y ligaya ko at inspirasyon sa buhayTanging ang maghihiwalay sa atin ay ang kamatayan

Binantayan ko ang iyong paglakiWala akong hinangad, kundi iyong ikabubutiLahat ng hirap ko at mga pighatiAy naiibsang lahat, kapag ikaw ay ngumiti

Iniwan nga kita noong ika’y musmos paWalang katiyakan kung muling magkikitaNgunit sa puso ko’y laging andito kaHindi ka nawala sa aking alaala

Anak ikaw ang buhay ko at wala ng ibaLagi kong dalangin na muli kang makasamaMuling maramdaman yakap mo sa twina,Ang makapiling ka, tunay na ligaya.

Author: Zyrel

Taiwan... Mei Yo Nama Wan

Are You Raising A Good Kid?

Author: Tony Bartolome, Editor, True Friends Newsmag

*Published in True Friends Newsmag (October 2008 issue)

Rumors And Gossips... Why It Hurts? How Does It Destroy Friendships?

Author: Rose Cruto Ho, TF Newsmag

Panloloko

Whoever puts God first in his life will be the first in His kingdom but whoever puts God last in his life will be the last in God's kingdom. Thank you sa lahat ng mga readers na nag-send ng comments, sama-sama uli tayo next month sa November issue.

Author: Ed Roquel, True Friends Newsmag

Connections

Legacy Of Hope

Si Pango At Si Pangit

Best of Bests

Quit Pulling Me Down, Crab!

Bayaning Luhaan

Could You Be Lorie

I love the wisdom of this person when she told me, “What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.” A very inspiring lady with a very inspiring life. Allow me to share to you…

That was 19 years ago. Currently, her first son is an engineer, the second a nurse. Both thriving, wonderful and the lights of her life. Reconciled to a totally changed man who fathered her children, she finally married him in 2000.

Like Lorie, I also believe in God. Just as when my grandmother always reminds me, “Troubles are God’s opportunities of calling us to Him.” And that if we face them with a humble heart, place our faith in God, and take the next right action, we will come through them better and stronger.

Author: Annabelle Libao

*Published in TF Newsmag (September 2008 issue)

On Mentors And Fathers

Life Is Goodbye, Life Is Hello

A Message From The Guild

Ang Bestfriend Kong Kikay

So Far And Yet So Close

Kunyang

Solemn Images

Tibo Ka Ba?

Once Upon A Time

The Guild

Nang maramdaman ko ang iyong pagpintig,
Napuno ng sigla ang aking daigdig
Ipinangako sa sarili na sa iyo iaalay,
Lahat ng makakaya, kahit ang aking buhay.

Habang ikaw nga ay nasa aking sinapupunan,
Bawat paggalaw mo’y sadyang hinihintay
Kaligayahan ang hatid sa puso’t isipan
Ang ngiti sa labi ko ay hindi napaparam

Ang iyong pagsilang ay pinananabikan
Hindi ko mahintay na ikaw ay mahawakan
At nang makita ka wala akong masambit
Isa kang munting anghel na kaloob ng langit

Dumaloy sa mata ko luha ng kaligayahan
Habang yakap kita sa aking kandungan
Ika’y ligaya ko at inspirasyon sa buhay
Tanging ang maghihiwalay sa atin ay ang kamatayan

Binantayan ko ang iyong paglaki
Wala akong hinangad, kundi iyong ikabubuti
Lahat ng hirap ko at mga pighati
Ay naiibsang lahat, kapag ikaw ay ngumiti

Iniwan nga kita noong ika’y musmos pa
Walang katiyakan kung muling magkikita
Ngunit sa puso ko’y laging andito ka
Hindi ka nawala sa aking alaala

Anak ikaw ang buhay ko at wala ng iba
Lagi kong dalangin na muli kang makasama
Muling maramdaman yakap mo sa twina,
Ang makapiling ka, tunay na ligaya.